The Untouched Heart

Chapter 89 - My Friend Forever

~Za~

I woke up this morning feeling very strange. Why do I always feel that I didn't sleep alone last night? The bed next to me was cold. Am I starting to hallucinate? If lying down with Hendra on this bed is just a dream, why does it feel so real?

“Mama, Mama!” The door to my room opened immediately and the children entered with happy faces. They always wake up faster than me. It's like their papa. I was always the last person to wake up between the three of us.

“You can shower yourself, Hadi. Why do you still wake up like this?” I yawned slowly while getting out of bed. Dira stretched out both hands asking to be carried. I obey. She laughed as I clamped her plump cheeks in a frenzy with my lips.

“Bow, Ma. I promise, tomorrow I'll shower myself.” He pulled my hand towards the bathroom. Yuyun stood in the doorway of the room. I handed my daughter to her, then headed to the bathroom with my son.

After Hadi finished the bath, I took a bath with Dira. Yuyun helped me by taking Hadi to her room so that she would wear her school uniform. Even though they were small, I never bathed them together.

They had breakfast with greed, then me and Dira drove Hadi up to the front porch of the house. I always told Liando to be careful when driving. My time today is not much, but I took the time to write on my blog.

I added another theme to my blog about children. I share with my readers the knowledge I gained while raising children since they were born. I didn't share any of their photos, just my experience. Hendra can protest if he finds out that I'm spreading photos of our two children.

Tired of playing alone on the floor, Dira came up to me and asked to sit on my lap. I obey. She hugged her doll while looking at what I typed on my laptop screen. Not long after that he fell asleep. I kissed her hair and looked at the open door.

Yuyun came in, then took my daughter from my arms. I have two hours until she wakes up and her sister comes home from school. But today will be different from the usual day. I have a surprise for my son.

I was already in his room when Dira woke up. He immediately asked to be hugged seeing me sitting on the edge of his bed. “Dira want to come pick up Brother at school?” askaku.

“Mau!” he answered quickly with a face.

“Then, change clothes and join Bu Yuyun, yes. Mama's not coming, so you have to be nice. Can you be nice, baby?”

“Can. Change clothes.” He pointed towards his clothing room impatiently. She was so affectionate towards her brother that whenever he could spend time with her, he was instantly happy.

She wanted to wear one of the dresses, so I complied with her request. I explained to him that I would not go. At first he was confused and intended to cancel coming with Yuyun to pick up Hadi. But after I tried to persuade her, she was finally willing to leave without me.

“We waited a long time. Dira definitely wouldn't want to go without her mom.” He shook his head slowly. I hugged and kissed both of her cheeks. “I told you, you come out with them, let us take care of everything. You've always been stubborn.”

“I won't let you bother yourself. This is my son's show,” I said insist.

“You already know she won't listen to you, you still want to advise her,” said Qiana who took turns hugging and kissing me. “Oh. Charlotte darling!” He approached the approaching Lindsey while holding his granddaughter.

“Don't put that face on, Zahara. Had enough. I don't want to cry anymore.” Lindsey looked at me sharply.

How can I not sympathize with him? His son, son-in-law, and first grandchild died in an accident. Charlotte was a baby, so she was left at home and Lindsey was looking after her. The condition of his son and son-in-law is very sad, but their daughter is not known where the storm is. Two years after the accident, Lindsey and Edu agree to stop the search. Clarissa was eventually presumed dead.

Claudia is almost crazy for losing her only daughter. Mason avenged his pain by suing the bus driver who hit their daughter's car with the maximum penalty. I can't imagine the pain they felt when they lost three loved ones at once.

Hadi and Clarissa were very close. We really hope to strengthen our relationship through their marriage. When Clarissa never came home again or was no longer at Lindsey's house every time we visited, she kept looking for her. I don't know how to explain that to him. So, I always said that Clarissa only left for a little while and they would meet again someday. Then he felt calm.

Claudia and I have no intention of bringing Hadi closer to Charlotte. We release them to determine their own partner. She and Mason are so grieving that they are unsure they will be able to help raise Charlotte. Therefore his custody was given entirely to Lindsey and Edu.

All my life, I've never witnessed some of my closest friends getting heartbroken at the same time. Lindsey and Claudia are strong women who are still able to stand up after their great loss. As a mother, I don't want to imagine it. I'm not sure I'll be able to lose Hadi or Dira.

“No one will forbid you to cry.” I hugged Lindsey who was looking at me with watery eyes. “I am still saddened by their departure. You must be sadder again.” Then I heard him sobbing. We hugged together. My best friend was present when I was in a bad state. I also want to be present when they are in a state of mourning.

“Come, come, we don't have much time.” Darla who first loosened her embrace. “Hadi and Dira will be home, the guests will also come. We haven't even got ready.”

Today is my son's fifth birthday. It was her first birthday that I wanted to celebrate. I remember the agreement between me and Hendra. He only gave me five years to be with the kids. I don't know about Dira, but if this is the last birthday I can celebrate with my son, then I want to make it very memorable and unforgettable.

As a guilty person in our marriage, I realized that I had no rights whatsoever. I don't want to extend the matter in court because I know that Hendra will get full custody of our children. How long will I pay for my past mistakes? Was it my whole life in this world?