The Untouched Heart

Chapter 118 - Learning from Mistakes

~Za~

I think I'm dreaming. Hendra and I were lying together after making love and confessing to each other our feelings. I don't know what made him kiss me in the corridor, but I'm grateful that I managed to put my annoyance aside and return the kiss.

The call from Qiana earlier completely ruined my mood. These few days since she had been living with us, I found her coming into the room and lying down with me. I don't know when he's been doing that, but it made me realize one thing. All I thought was a dream was reality. He really came to sleep here with me.

Hendra must not this time just quietly go into the room when I was comfortable, then lie down with me. Since he was already out of the room when I woke up in the morning, then I never caught his habit wet. He once said that I was like a dead man when I was sleeping. Whatever happens, I don't wake up. He must have used it.

Then he met a young girl and had dinner in a special room where there were only two of them in it? What else would he do if he wasn't making out with her? He's been home long enough, so time's enough for dinner. But he came home and said he had not eaten. I can't help myself not feeling jealous.

“So, what are you doing with that woman in the restaurant?” I ask you to remember the incident. He's laughing a little. I immediately pinched her hand that was in front of my chest. The sound of laughter immediately turned into a hissing sound of pain.

“We didn't do anything, okay? Mama invited me to dinner together, and I was surprised that there was only that woman in the room. I left immediately because I never liked the way he used my parents to meet me.”

“After this old age there are still women who want to approach you out there?” manya tease him.

“I'm not that old. I'm still thirty-seven years old,” protest. He tightened his embrace. “We should sleep. There are many things we need to do tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow is Saturday. What business do you have?” many confused. Instead of answering, he just told me to sleep.

He did what he said last night. That morning he woke me up and forced me to exercise with him. Children who are accustomed to waking up early, are actually very happy to be able to move so early. They were trying to catch up to the speed of their papa legs that ran faster than the rest of us.

“I beg you, I'm not strong anymore.” Just once around the house, I was out of breath. Hendra and the kids are still running. They are far ahead of me. Ara also followed them cheerfully. I'm the only one who's exhausted by myself.

Relieved no one forced me to keep running with them, I sat on the side porch and enjoyed the drinks Yuyun provided. Just sitting with eyes closed enjoying the wind, someone touched both of my hands and pulled me to stand up.

“Not yet to stop.” Hendra kept pulling me until I got back to the yard. The children and Ara did not stop running.

“I beg you, Hendra. My leg feels like it's coming off.” I put on a face. He smiled while shaking his head. “I hate you so much.”

“I love you more, baby.” I opened my mouth to hear him imitate my words last night. Luckily he only asked me to run one more round and then get some rest.

We had breakfast together on the terrace, then took a shower. I am grateful that Hendra will accompany Dira to play because I am very sleepy. I chose to lie in bed. I don't know how long I slept, the house felt so quiet when I woke up.

The digital clock shows at ten in the morning. I got out of the room and headed downstairs. The house is completely deserted. No sound of children or dog salakan. Where's everybody going? I checked the living room and saw Hendra sitting alone watching a movie from one of the television stations.

“Hey, are you awake?” He patted the surface of the sofa nearby. I followed and sat down beside him. I look around us.

“Kids to where?” many confused.

“What do you want to do?” I smiled at him.

“Our date. Watch while talking or occasionally kiss and cuddle.” He kissed my cheek. “I love you, baby. I'm happy we can be together again like this.”

“I love you too. But I'm still mad at you for jogging this morning made my feet hurt.” I massaged my thighs to dramatize.

“It won't hurt again once you get used to it later.” He took off his embrace and kept his distance from me. I was confused when he raised my leg to his lap. But when his hands started massaging my feet, I understood.

“I'm sorry,” I said slowly.

“We won't discuss him again.” Hendra looked at me seriously.

“I want to say this to dispose of all misunderstandings between us.” I begged him. He lowered his head and continued massaging my legs. “I've hurt you so deeply. It took me a long time to realize how I felt about you. I beg you to forgive me for the hell I gave you for six years, Hendra.”

He shook his head slowly. “You didn't always give me hell. We had a bad start. I'm guilty here too. I shouldn't be in a hurry to marry you while you're still hurt after breaking up with your ex. If I wanted to be a little patient, things would have been different. That's why I don't want to talk about this. We learn from mistakes. That's enough.”

“You're right.” I smiled at him.

“Now, tell me. Since when do you love me?” He smiled happily.

“I don't know. Maybe on my thirtyth birthday? But I only realized it when we came home from a trip to Bali on the wedding day of Princess Darla,” I answered honestly.

“Why don't you want to tell me?” tanyanya wants to know.

“I don't know. I'm looking for the right time. Then you found out that me and Aldo .. and it all fell apart. You no longer say love, I doubt that my feelings will be able to improve things. So I chose to be quiet.”

“You think that I don't love you anymore, therefore you don't want to be honest with me?” I nodded slowly. “I understand. I also decided to split up because I doubt that you really love me. Do you remember the day I went to London after learning of your pregnancy?”

“Iya. You do not want to go but are forced due to business dealings with Xavier.” I'm laughing a little.

“The day I arrived in London, you couldn't write anything on your blog. You remember?” asked Hendra who I immediately greeted with a nod. “We slept together without breaking the phone. When I almost fell asleep, I heard you say love.”

“I was so happy that I was in a hurry to get home soon. But when I came home, your attitude was still the same. A few days later, the man came and said that you guys are back together.” He looks sad.

“And you think, that word of love I addressed to Aldo, not to you,” I said concluding. He nodded his head. “Our life is really messy because of our own mistakes.”

“Do not hide anything from me anymore. When you do something that will break my heart though, tell me. I will try to find a way to forgive you. I would too. Because it's the secret that has ruined our marriage, Za.”