The Untouched Heart

Chapter 109 - Happening Again

~Za~

I am a mother and I cannot be blamed for my instincts to save my son's life far above my own. No one can say that I broke a promise because my first promise was to take care of my children as best I could.

Seeing the help coming earlier, I thought things were safe and victory was on our side. I had no idea that anyone had suddenly opened the front door when I was trying to catch Hendra and the puppy towards the side of the house.

He immediately made my body a shield, even pointing at the cold thing in my head. My body shook violently when I knew it was a gun. I'm about to die silly in his hands. I regret not listening to Hendra, but I do not regret following my motherly instincts who impatiently wanted to know the state of my daughter.

I would never have guessed that the little creature I hated so much because of its name would come biting off the man's leg with all its might. The sound of the shot I thought was directed at me gave me a half-dead yelling reflex. It turned out that one of the police officers shot the hand of the criminal who was holding the gun.

The little creature who was somehow so angry was unwilling to let go of the man's ankle even though the police had already come to detain him. A police officer approached me and took me to Hendra. He immediately hugged me. I let out a sigh of relief when I felt Dira was also near me. But I haven't had a chance to check it, Hendra looked at my face carefully.

He was so worried about me. Hugging and unwilling to let go of his hand, then now he was angry just because of the little thing I had done? And just like his bad habits all along, I'm not allowed to explain anything. I tried to run, he moved faster by catching my hand.

My heart was pounding hard because he was holding me with his other hand. I don't know if it's a beating out of fear or hope he'll give me a nice punishment. When her lips touched mine, hm, she gave me the punishment I expected.

I pretended I didn't want him to stop him. He could have wanted to repay me for what I did to him yesterday. Realizing that she wasn't playing around with her kiss, I replied to her. Suddenly he lifted my body. I looked at him confused. Before I could think, he kissed me again.

He put my body on the bed. My heart is pounding faster. Is this what I think it is? I almost cried when he didn't stop until we touched the skin with the skin. I miss this. He's not drunk, so he'll remember everything we did this morning.

We were ready to pull ourselves together and I quietly said goodbye to the waiting of my banner. He's stopped. I felt him stop moving above me. We have come this far but he stopped. I opened my eyes to scold him.

But the pained face I saw in front of me, the tightly closed eyes, and the sweat pouring down his face made me feel full. His entire body trembled violently. I touched his cheek.

“It's okay, Hendra,” I said slowly.

“I'm sorry. I can't do it,” he sobbed. “I think I'm ready. But I can't do it yet.” Is he still angry with me? Is the reason he stopped this morning the same as the reason five years ago? What made him unable to make love to me? Is it because he thinks that my body no longer belongs to him?

I tried to sit down, she shifted to my left side. Although this position was uncomfortable for me, I still hugged her. Hendra doesn't like it when anyone sees him crying. So I try to ignore that. I kissed her shoulders, her neck, her jaw, to help calm her down. He just sat tight without touching me at all.

“I have to clean myself,” he said slowly. I looked at his face. He avoided my eyes.

“It is better not,” reject it. I gave up by letting go of my embrace. “Close your eyes.”

“Why? I've seen your body often without being covered by anything,” I said teasingly.

“Close your eyes or I will stay seated here and let Hadi or Dira into the room ...” threatened. I immediately closed my eyes with both hands. I won't let either or any of my kids see scenes for adults. I smiled as I felt her kiss on my forehead.

Zahara is not the name if one hundred percent obey orders. I put a little distance between my fingers in order to see his body from behind. The man I love is perfect in every way. His body, his nature, his head, even his wallet. I have gone mad to release a man worth a hundred to be the target of another woman.

Just sec. Is that the problem? He's not divorcing me because he doesn't love me anymore. Did she let me go because she couldn't fuck with me anymore? Is that why he freed me to be with a man who could make me happy? Why does he think that being happy means being satisfied in bed? Did he really rate me that low?

But what can I do to help him? I didn't know very well how a man's body works when, ah, yes! Why would I have a younger brother if I couldn't use it? I'm so stupid. Talking to Papa was not a good choice because it was certain that Papa would not want to see me again for an entire month if I dared to ask a very intimate question. Papa's too colossal. So too with Mama.

Talking to my friends won't help much either. They've all gone mad and will only insult and ridicule this poor me. They were the right choice because their experience in bed was clearly more than mine.

Alright. I'm just talking about this with Zach. He knows Hendra well. Who knows, my beloved man once discussed this with my sister.

“Are you not cold to the point of letting your body not be covered by anything from earlier?” asked Hendra who had just come out of the bathroom. Hm. He who was in a fresh state could make any woman willing to kneel at his feet. Oh, my gosh, Za. What are you thinking? I immediately shook my head. “Make sure you are thinking dirty.”

“Not my head wrong. You who give free spectacle.” I felt cold, so I covered my body with a blanket. “I've decided it.”

“Decide what?” hendra asked while keeping a distance from me. His attitude even made me more challenged to approach him. I just stopped when he was cornered on the wall.

“I'll help you with the little Hendra dysfunction problem.” I looked towards the towel. He looked in the same direction. “He will be able to act again later.”

“You think I can't do it because there's a problem with my reproductive organs?” I asked with a face of disbelief. I nodded quickly. His face turned red as he held back a laugh. What's so funny? Not long after, he did not hold himself back anymore and laughed out loud. So loud that I was upset.

“Why are you laughing?” I'm a little angry.

“Honey, no problem with me.” He tried to control himself and stopped laughing. Then he brought his face closer to me. “I only need to drink enough whiskey, then the little Hendra will act all night without problems. Dira is the proof.”