Dear, Soul!!

Follows

It's still hard for me to accept the fact that Fauzi ended our relationship. Every time I remember her words, her behavior and her cold gaze my heart becomes more and more sick. Yes, this is the punishment I received for what I did, I should have prepared myself to take this kind of risk. I tried to let go of everything and make this a lesson for me, but it still hurts. As hard as I tried to sincerely, I still did not want my relationship with Fauzi to end.

What Mom said was true, only regret I got when Fauzi left me. I was crying but nothing changed. Mom tried to calm me down but it was all in vain when I realized, Fauzi is no longer someone I have.

I tried over and over again to contact Fauzi, but none of my calls were made. Dozens or maybe hundreds of messages I sent to Fauzi but none got a reply. I don't know what else to do.

I kept calling Fauzi until the end.. What I heard from across the phone was no longer the tone waiting for the call but the voice of the operator telling me that I could no longer call Fauzi's number, Fauzi blocked my call. My feelings were getting broken, I tried to contact him again to confirm it once again and all I met was my feeling of getting crushed knowing Fauzi had actually blocked the incoming call from my phone number.

I sent Fauzi a message.

"Ozi forgive me.."

"Ozi I won't be like this anymore, I won't repeat it.."

"I promise Ozi.."

My message was sent but there was absolutely no response from Fauzi. Never mind responding, I haven't even seen a blue double check mark that indicates a message is read on my message.

I still keep texting, hoping to get a response from Fauzi even if it's just once. But once again I felt a tremendous pain in my heart. The message I sent was still sent though not read but this time the message I sent was only getting a tick one which means my message did not arrive. Did Fauzi block my message too?

I'm still trying until some of the same messages and results I'm still seeing, my message doesn't reach Fauzi.

I kept crying, I didn't know how to explain everything to Fauzi. I don't know what else I can do to improve my relationship with Fauzi.

"No. I can't just keep quiet like this.." I grabbed my jacket and my phone, I had to catch up with Fauzi at her house, I had to be stronger and more apologetic, I had to convince Fauzi once again.

I rushed down.

"Where are you, baby?" Ask the mother who saw me hurry out.

"Fauzi Bu's house, I'm sure Fauzi is still in his house.."

"Fauzi's house? Don't you realize it's late now.."

"But Ma'am.."

"Now it's ten o'clock at night Salwa, how can you get there this late.."

"Mom, Fauzi blocked my phone number.. I can't call Fauzi anymore.." I said sobbing crying.

"But it's late at night, son, what Fauzi's parents said when they saw you there so late at night.."

I didn't think there because my mind was filled with Fauzi. What would Fauzi's parents say when late at night like this I went there with my situation like this.

"Momuu..." My crying is getting worse.

"Dear, try to explain to Fauzi again tomorrow and rest tonight first.." My mother hugged me trying to calm me down.

I was crying in my arms, Mom was trying to calm me down.

.

.

.

My eyes are heavy and my head feels dizzy. I don't know how long I cried after returning to my room last night, I felt so helpless.

I rushed to get ready, I'm going to Fauzi's house this morning I'm sure Fauzi is still at home and hasn't returned to college. I compressed my eyes with the spoon I had put in the refrigerator so that the swelling subsided a little.

"Good morning, ma'am.." My greeting to Mother Fauzi while falling open the door when my front doorbell presses.

"Oh Salwa's.. Good morning son, tumben early in the morning here? Come on in, son.."

"Hehe yes Ma'am sorry to interrupt early in the morning.."

"Hem.. Disturbing what I'm happy about you coming, so come here often to see me.." Mother Fauzi said kindly

"Yes Mom.." Answer smiled.

"Eh, don't bother Ma'am, Salwa's just for a second.."

"Well, what is it? I haven't played at home in a long time.."

"Hehe yes Ma'am, Salwa yesterday was busy preparing for the test"

"Oiya, I forgot that Fauzi had come home yesterday to congratulate me"

"I am, Mom.." I answered with a thin smile. Hearing Mother Fauzi say that was like reminding me of what happened yesterday.

"How was yesterday? What surprise did he give you?" Ask her mother excitedly.

"Ah I it.." I hesitated a little.

"Udah has not been told, Salwa must be ashamed.. Hehe young people today know a more romantic way than we used to.." Mother Fauzi said teasing me, I only responded with a smile. From the question it seems like his mother doesn't know about what happened yesterday.

"Np.. Ma'am, where's Fauzi? How is it not visible?" I was trying to figure out Fauzi's whereabouts.

"Lohs.. Fauzi didn't tell you?"

"Say what Mom?"

"Fauzi came back this morning, son, I thought he told you.."

Fauzi is back.

"Ah.. Fa Fauzi didn't say, maybe he called me this morning but since my phone wasn't active he didn't have time to say ma'am.." I said lying, Her mother could have suspected that she knew Fauzi had not told me.

"It seems so, son, because he went early in the morning he said there was a lecture this morning"

"Oh yes, ma'am.."

"Mother initially forbade him to return first, it seemed like he was not well.."

"Less healthy?"

"Yes, after yesterday afternoon Fauzi continued in her room, I asked her why she said she was tired. Hem could be tired but I'm worried he's sick too but I don't want to say because I don't want to worry.."

If only Ms. Fauzi knew the cause of her son who seemed to be unwell because of yesterday's incident, I might not be sitting sweet with him now.

It turns out that Fauzi is back, how can I apologize, how can I improve my relationship with Fauzi.

Ah yeah..

"Mom, can I have an address for Fauzi's house there?"

"What's the son for?"

"I want to follow Fauzi there, Mom?"

"You sure?"

"Yes ma'am, all to make sure that Fauzi's condition is fine, that he's in good health"

"I'll write down the address for a minute.."

"But Ma'am, don't tell Fauzi I want to give Fauzi a surprise" I said, telling Fauzi's mother not to tell Fauzi and to make Fauzi avoid me again.

"But you get there later nobody picks you up"

"What's wrong Mom, I can go there directly find Fauzi's address, later it's not a surprise if he already knows first if I want to go there"

"Well then, son, I'm just worried that you're going there and Fauzi isn't showing you off.."

"What's wrong Mom.." Answer smiled.

Fauzi's mother gave me Fauzi's address there, I'll catch up with Fauzi there.