Dear, Soul!!

The 23 Review

There is no pain that can be calmly explained from the betrayal of highly trusted people. What action should be taken?? Can you vent all the emotions that stir in the heart and spill all the disappointments that seemed to slice into the blood vessels, the heart that hurt can no longer be conditioned.

Am I missing two people I trust so much right now?? Can I thrash with my anger, blow away all the pain of my feelings, shower you with harsh words of my disappointment and kill you in my heart in order to throw away everything related to you. Can I take responsibility for my feelings? If you had been in my office, what would you do???

Fauzi turned his gaze away from Farhan and Salwa who were blocked by the door glass although he could still hear the conversation that threw each other's attention. Fauzi's tears trickled back after he had previously wiped them. Fauzi looked down, sobbing and unable to look forward to seeing Farhan and Salwa. "What do I do now??" Thought Fauzi. He tried to calm his mind and think what kind of action he should take.

"Loh, Nak Fauzi? How can you stand in front of the door? How come you're not in??" Ask Salwa's mother while running towards Fauzi with a bag in her hand.

Ms. Salwa's question made Fauzi surprised and immediately wiped her tears before Salwa's mother arrived right in front of her. Fauzi raised his face and tried to smile at his mother Salwa.

"I just got to Mom, took a breath for a while because I ran around looking for Salwa's room.." Answer Fauzi.

"Jaudah, come on in.."

Fauzi steps in with Salwa's mother to meet Salwa and Farhan in Salwa's hospital room. Fauzi was still constantly trying to control his expression while thinking what action he should take next. If you ask about anger, obviously Fauzi is very angry and disappointed at this time only he cannot immediately show his anger because he has to think in the future what it will be like. Fauzi did not want to be rash and again after seeing the response of his mother Salwa who was mediocre with the presence of Farhan there indicates that Salwa's mother did not know about the relationship between Salwa and Farhan.

Conversations in Salwa's room began, Ms. Salwa began to discuss something but nothing could be heard either by Fauzi because of her unruly thoughts. Fauzi who had been worried about Salwa should have scurryed to Salwa to vent his worries but with what he had just seen finally Fauzi just looked at her blankly and did not say much.

Fauzi still answers some questions from Ms. Salwa even though she has not been able to really focus.

"Have you asked your mother if you'd come home?" Ask Salwa's Mother.

"Be not yet ma'am, because I was too worried right up until I was running around here so I forgot to ignore Mom.."

"Hem.. Let your mother know, son.."

"Yes ma'am, I'm sorry to go out for a minute. Salwa, I'm out for a second.." Fauzi said permission without staring at Salwa.

Fauzi walked out of Salwa's room, this was the time for her to think what action she should take next. All the way out Fauzi's tears kept dripping.

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Fauzi arrived at her home with her shabby face and her puffy eyes.

"I'm home, Mom.." Fauzi said to her mother when her mother opened the door for her.

"Mother's accident chimes.." Fauzi said flatly.

"Accident, how could it be? How's she doing now???" Ask his mother surprised.

"He's fine and now he's in the hospital.."

"Later Mom was there with Dad to see him.. Now you go in first, have you eaten, son??"

Fauzi.

"You get changed and wash your face first, Mother of your favorite food.." His mother tried to understand his son's feelings.

Fauzi knew his mother thought that his facial and eye expression was her concern for Salwa, who had just been in an accident, but what caused it all was because of his feelings that were destroyed after seeing Farhan and Salwa earlier. Fauzi let Mother misunderstand because telling her mother the truth will only muddy the atmosphere.

Fauzi sat down behind the door of his room, slowly his tears trickled back but he quickly caressed. "What should I do now??" Fauzi asked himself while covering his eyes. "Arrmg......" Fauzi pulled her hair because she was upset and unable to think clearly. "Am I just hallucinating? Was that true? I don't want to believe that it's real..." Fauzi kept questioning himself even though he knew he had no answer.

Fauzi walked up and sat down at his desk, looking at his picture with Salwa during his high school graduation. Fauzi raised the photo, felt Salwa's face through the photo and again her tears dripped down the glass frame she was holding. Fauzi put his picture frame upside down, he seemed unable to see Salwa's face even though only through photos.

Fauzi grabbed a book that he had been writing things that had to do with Salwa. He was getting used to putting his feelings in books now.

"I wish what I saw today was a dream or just a mistake.."

Fauzi wrote that one sentence and closed the book again. He put his head on the book while constantly thinking what he should do now. Although there was too much pain and disappointment, Fauzi was still unable to let go of Salwa or lose Farhan as his best friend.

"Darling... You still haven't changed???" Ask her mother who came in to see her son. Fauzi's mother was sad to see her son even though all she knew was that Fauzi was injured because of Salwa's accident. "Bring first son, so that your mind can be clearer. I'm waiting for you downstairs, I'm sure your favorite food is.." Her mother said attentively

"I am, Mom.." Fauzi was still trying to smile at his mother.

Fauzi went and headed for the bathroom, hoping that his mind could be clearer after finishing the bath later.

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After a long time of thinking, Fauzi finally chose to pretend not to know about Farhan and Salwa's relationship while seeing how their relationship was also their own relationship with Salwa. Fauzi himself is not ready to lose Salwa as his lover and Farhan as his best friend. He will see how in the future, if Salwa really prefers Farhan later, then he is ready to release Salwa. Fauzi thought, how can he separate Salwa and Farhan if the two love each other, not just because he was early with Salwa until he had to block the feelings of both. Yes Fauzi thought like that even though his heart was very hurt and really not ready to lose Salwa.