Forever Love

Impossibly

Qania drove the speed of his motorbike slowly as soon as he got out of the campus area, then he turned his motorbike into a cafe near the campus that he used to go with Lala when he was off college. Qania parked his bike and then he got off and went inside the cafe.

“Hahh sucks, today it really sucks” grumbled Qania then without asking or excuse me he immediately sat on the piano bench and opened the piano.

Wrenggp

Qania pressed the piano hard to vent her frustration.

Meanwhile, in the room of the cafe owner who was checking the financial statements immediately shocked and furious because again someone touched his favorite piano.

“Ridwan should I intervene to drive away people who dare to touch my piano” he said with annoyance when Ridwan picked up the phone that was on the table in his room.

“Sorry sir, I really do not know if any visitor touched your piano Pak” said Ridwan nervously.

“Don't just apologize, if I intervene myself then you are no longer useful to work here” threatened.

Ridwan, who was about twenty-five years old, understood very well with the word useless leading to the word dismissal so quickly he came out of his room looking for someone who was presumptuously playing his favorite piano that boss.

Even if you are not mine

Nam…

“Please lady stop playing this piano”,.

Just as Qania was singing, she was stopped by a frightened looking man walking over to her.

“What's up?” tanya Qania turned the body.

“Sorry miss but the owner of this cafe strictly prohibits anyone from touching this piano” replied Ridwan.

“Haha then what is this piano for here? As displays? Or to attract the attention of visitors?” Qania chuckled at Ridwan's reply.

“Sorry miss once again I apologize and please do not touch the piano because my work is at stake Miss” said Ridwan asked for mercy.

“Yes I've become no longer interested, just touching the piano alone can not. Basic stingy” grumbled Qania while standing up leaving Ridwan who finally breathed a sigh of relief.

Qania walked to the parking lot to pick up his bike, he who had wanted to eliminate the annoyance was even more upset. Finally Qania decided to look for a roadside stall to find his favorite menu, roasted chicken.

 

Qania parked his muscles on the edge of a quiet tent stall, there was only the salesman sitting waiting for the buyer. Qania rushed into the tent after ordering two servings of grilled chicken and immediately sat down to wait for the food to be cooked.

Qania reached into her bag to grab her phone and pressed the video call button on her mother's contact number.

“Assalamu’alaikum ma” greet Qania as soon as see the face of his mother.

“Wa’alaikum salam son, how are you? Where are you again?” ask her mother who looks to be sitting on Arqasa's seat.

“Qania good news ma, I'm again in this tent stall want lunch”,.

“Hallo mommy's son, it's big huh son. Don't miss mommy?” qania asked Arqasa who looked more and more beautiful, Qania tried to hold back her tears that wanted to spill.

“Arqasa kangen very same mommy, so mommy study diligently so that her lecture can be quickly finished and go home to play the same Arqasa” said her mother imitated the voice of a child.

Qania chuckled, he continued to invite his son to talk via video call until finally two servings of roasted chicken came and he decided to end his call.

“Okay darling, mommy wants to eat first huh. Later when it reaches the kost mommy will call again” said Qania ended his call.

“Oke mommy, bye”,.

After saying her greeting Qania kept her phone back in her bag then stared at the food in front of her. Qania did not expect her tears to drip out just looking at her lunch menu this time.

“I miss you baby, I really miss you. I hope God will give you back to me. I know I'm crazy, I'm not sane, but I still demand that God give you back to me so that we can eat grilled chicken together again” lirih Qania then wipe her tears and directly devour her food.

The father of the grilled chicken seller felt sorry to see Qania who was sad while eating her food, she overhears Qania's conversation on the phone, and from there she learns that Qania is a wife who was left for dead by her husband and has one child who is away from her.

After nearly half an hour, Qania finally finished two portions of the grilled chicken and gave thanks to the Creator.

“Thank you sir, the change is for you only because the roasted chicken is very tasty” said Qania while handing over one hundred thousand bills.

“Wah thanks a lot mbak. Oh yes mbak new people are here?” asked the father while keeping the money in his waist bag.

“Oh yes sir, I'm new here and I'm spending it at Nilam's house. Oh yes, father every day selling here?” ask Qania.

“Iya mbak, from ten o'clock in the morning to ten o'clock in the evening” he replied.

“Wah then I will return again sir. I say goodbye said Qania happy so with the seller.

“Thank you mbak, be careful” the thrill of which was answered a nod by Qania.

 

*

*

 

Qania smiled to see her mom sitting in the living room alone with her papa.

“Which atmosphere is ma?” ask Qania.

“Udah bobo him, this afternoon invited his two grandfather to walk-” replied his mother.

“Pa, he said he wanted to come but why not come anyway?” qania asked with a sullen face.

“There is still no time off son, especially now entering the end of papa's term. Where papa wants to nominate regent as well, papa is busy nak sorry” replied his father sadly.

“Iya deh pa, the important thing is we can still communicate” said Qania sighing long.

“Oh yes dear, actually there are people who want to ask but papa always forget” said his papa looked seriously at the mobile screen.

“What pa?”,.

“It was on campus emang no guy who has a crush on you” said his papa then chuckled.

“Hm kirain apa” ketus Qania.

“Jawab dong babe” pinta papa baring laughter.

“Yes there is a pa, even I have rejected more than ten guys pa” replied Qania lethargic.

“You still can't open your heart son?” ask her mother.

“Ma, Arkana is not even two years old Qania Ma. Wherever possible Qania can forget it and open the heart as soon as this and even Qania has decided not to open the heart of Qania to anyone”.

“Mama knows baby, but you are still very young and you also need a companion son, do not stop because Arkana is gone, because your world is still spinning and running. Don't fall into your grief nak” advice mama.

“Ma, Qania has said that Qania does not want to marry again ma. Arkana was love with Qania to death, the time of Qania could have betrayed him” refuted Qania.

“Nak is different position Arka with your position, do not make a decision that you will regret someday” he said.

“Qania is sure Pa, Ma. If you are only going to discuss this we should just finish our conversation because Qania remains in the decision of Qania Ma, Pa. Forgive Qania, Assalamu’alaikum”,.

Exasperated, Qania immediately disconnected the video call and threw her phone at the pillow next to her.

Qania POV

 

My heart ached when my mom and dad asked me like that. I actually know they love me and worry about my future. But I couldn't hold back my anger because I still couldn't forget Arkana and I was asked to find a replacement.

I also just realized that the words of my parents are the same as Julius said last afternoon, I actually did justify their words but really my heart rejected all that.

Was I wrong to have behaved this way because I wanted to be loyal to my husband?

Am I being selfish to both my parents and to the men I have rejected?

But again sorry, my heart totally rejects all of this. I simply could not accept the feelings of others entering my heart. Especially on Julius who I know how much he cares about me.

It is impossible for me to share my feelings and change the world I am currently forming with only me, my son and Arkana in it. I was reluctant to turn away because this feeling was so deep for her that I could not see and feel the affection of others.

I don't want Arkana's treasure to fall into my own hands, nor to secure my son's future. My dad has a company and I already have a college degree, it's not hard for me to get a job to support my son and myself.

It's purely because I can't open my heart. I was scared, I was so scared to open my heart and feel disappointment again. I don't want to change them like my Arkan because it hurts them because I love them just because I see my husband in them.

I'm afraid of remarrying because I don't want my love for my son to be divided if I have a child later and of course my husband will love his biological son more and I will see my son left aside, I don't want that to happen.

I just want to live alone with my son and the memories of Arkana in our lives. I don't want my son to be the victim of injustice if I get married and I'm required to love my second child later and leave my son with Arkana if that's my husband's request. Because it does not rule out the possibility that later I married my husband did not love my son as we knew each other.

Well, he loves my son, but it must be different from the affection he will give his own son and I guarantee it will happen.

And one more thing that was afraid of me getting married again, I was afraid to share my body with others. I just want to be touched by Arkana and just one person. I can't imagine what it would be like if a different man touched my body, touching every inch of it. I'm not willing and I don't want to let my body belong to someone else.

Yes maybe this is what makes me reluctant to accept every man who tries to approach me.

 

The Qania POV End.

 

Long Qania dissolved in his daydreams until finally he could no longer endure his drowsiness.

 

...🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀...