MY DESTINY

148.WANTING TO END HIS LIFE

"His name just got to know Ci's love, what people say will not be accepted. What else have you not seen the reality directly."Koko Dion.

"Yes, that's it," Cici Sahita was no longer talking about Anah. Because they have arrived at their destination, the church to do its duty.

While Anah was embarrassed while waiting for Hendra never arrived. It had even been two hours waiting, Anah left that place.

Anah walks to Hendra's workplace, meets Dani. Asked where Hendra was, Dani said that Hendra had come home from 5 pm yesterday. And stated that Hendra came home after receiving his last paycheck.

"Did he no longer work here?"asked Anah with a sad feeling.

Because now he just believes what Edi said. And all the advice of his employers, especially on Cici Sahita.

"No he goes out, he says he'll find work near his house."Dani replied, with an indescribable smile.

Anah looked at the smiles of Dani and the others. Except for Edi, because Edi just looked at him with a flat gaze. Without another word Anah turned back and walked away. But not to go home to work but to go the other way.

Edi did not come close at all, he felt disappointed by Anah's attitude. Who considers himself to have lied to himself, by vilifying Hendra behind him. Though he loved Anah, did not want this to happen. Because you don't want Anah heartache, breakup and heartbreak.

Anah was sitting on the side of the road of the new city, right under a big tree. Anah pondered there, lamenting his ever-sad fate. From he was a child until now, he wanted to live a happy life. He got what he wanted, but everything seemed to be on his side.

Until his head was dizzy thinking about all the things that had happened. In the confusion of his fate, perch up bad thoughts. Strayed in the mind, if he m*ti even no one will care. Bad thoughts a few years ago, when he was betrayed by his father. The more you turn, the crying will not change anything.

Now his eyes looked at the large road even crowded other four-wheeled vehicles. Anah stood up from her seat, then stepped towards the middle of the road. He could no longer endure the pain of heartache.

Which always ends in deep disappointment. Maybe with him hitting himself, on the car. He will never again be hurt, disappointed and miserable. But when Anah wanted to step, her legs felt heavy. It's even hard to move forward. Repeatedly he tried to not be able to, but in motion backwards can.

From that Anah retreated and sat back down, crying out so badly. What is happening to him right now, he is very confused. Even wanting to end his life is not easy to do.

"Oh Allah why am I like this, I'd rather just v. I'm tired of living in endless sadness, disappointment, and suffering."

Brucks

"Dark..." Shouted Anah, when there was a tree branch falling and hit his head.

"Oh Allah has a headache." Anah cried back as she pleased, until anyone passing by saw her crying self. There is also a pity that mocks, through the look of his eyes.

After calming down with her cries, Anah pondered what had happened just now was a reprimand for her. Because it has protested with the decree of God, the destiny of every human being. The destiny of every human being is different.

When Anah did the action b*ruh himself earlier coincided with the Adhan Dzuhur. I don't know what happened to Anah, is this a rebuke from the Supreme One. That the journey of his life is still long and there will be happiness that he expects.

After finishing with her musings, Anah is aware of her whereabouts. Looking around, I don't know where. It can be said rude, because he does not know where at the moment. He just followed the footsteps with a blank look, as he left earlier.

"Yes Allah.... I'm where this is." He never went anywhere, other than the compound where he lived. Anah remembered from which direction he was going. Ten minutes later, after he re-recorded the incident. Now he remembered, he was walking from the left. If you want to return to her employer's house, Anah must walk back.

Anah traced that path with her consciousness. Until he saw the new market of central Jakarta, which Anah memorized the way home. Because Anah often to the new market if the road together with his temen. Who else is Anah's friend, if not the baby sitters who work with Cici Junita.

"Thank God to meet you on your way home, after walking for more than half an hour. Where was I then, huh? I don't know you guys, you fools."Grateful and self-abusing.

Choosing to go to the public toilet first to wash his face, after that he just came home. From the new market to his employer's home in just 20 minutes.

"Where have you been until this hour just got home?"ask Miss Kristine.

"I'm taking a walk first."Answer Anah with a flat face.

Yes Anah tried to cover all the problems that are being faced. Because he did not want to laugh, so he forgot all his problems today. Not that it will be lost from his memory, until the rest of his life this incident will never be forgotten.

"Keep what about your future in-laws? Are they good?"again, his eyes glanced at Sahita. In order not to make a sound, when in front of Anah.

"I didn't go there, because I went somewhere I never forgot. After waiting for Hendra two hours did not come. Excuse me first Yes, the sign has not prayed Dzuhur. I still have time to work." Without waiting for an answer from his mistress directly climbed to the second floor.

And go into the room to get a towel and a change of clothes. Then come back down because the bathroom is just downstairs. Immediately shower lightning because chasing time, which is already mepet.

After the Dzuhur and Ashar Anah prayers, immediately wash the clothes that have been queued. This afternoon Anah, doing all the work of Anah.

From far away there were four eyes that kept paying attention to Anah. Who else if not Edi and Dani. From different directions there are also those who observe Anah. She was astonished since morning not to see Anah, as soon as she saw Anah again washing clothes.

Anah washing not with total hands, but use a 2-tube washing machine. Then Anah can while casually looking at the view from above. But that's usually, not for now. Anah while waiting for the laundry Anah washes her own clothes. After finishing watering the plants above then the ones below.

So that makes the person on the other side surprised, because not usually Anah too focused on work.

*****Connected....