Sharing Love: Loving Myself And Herself
Abizar.
Abizar could only sit limp while waiting for Khanza's surgery to be completed, he felt very sorry for what he had done. Why he had to turn off the tone of his phone just because he didn't want to be disturbed. Why did he not take his cell phone anywhere while he knew that his wife was pregnant and that this might happen. All of that just kept smothering his chest. However, regret is still regret, regret will not change something that has happened, can only be made valuable learning so as not to repeat the same mistakes.
Only this time Abizar felt completely useless, he could not do anything just sit back waiting for the open operating room door.
No matter how much money he had it would be useful in the current situation.
"What if something happens to Khanza, Mas" said Farah who sat next to Abizar.
"Never say that, I'm sure Khanza will be fine, if anything happens to him I won't forgive myself for the rest of my life."
"They're the reason, Mom. Mas did not pick up our call, did Mas know how anxious we were at that time," said Farah began to get upset.
"I was just gonna turn it off for a little while, but because it's too late in my job, I forgot about it."
"Mas, Mas knows that Khanza is pregnant should be Mas It's on alert, always monitor the condition of Khanza."
"Yes, I know it's all my fault" Abizar said frustratedly, He could only massage his head tugging at his hair, a sense of regret continuing to lash out at his chest cursing at himself, that's what he's doing right now.
"Where's the baby?" asked Abizar who had just remembered their baby.
"Our baby is in the baby's room, I've left it to the nurse" replied Farah.
"How is he doing?" ask Abizar.
"He's fine, Mas. There's nothing to worry about about the baby" Farah replied.
Abizar breathed a sigh of relief, "Thank God. I'm not a good husband and Papa to them."
Farah answered nothing, for she was right in what she said. Farah was still upset with her husband - he could not activate the tone of his phone in this situation.
"I'll call Mama" said Farah who remembered her in-laws.
Abizar just nodded, continuing to hide his face behind his palm.
Farah called her in-laws, Wardah's mom.
"What ... giving birth? It's not that this isn't the time yet" Wardah's mother panicked.
"Yes, it's not Mah's time yet, but the baby is out and now Khanza's condition is very critical. Khanza is in the operating room" Farah explained.
"Yes, Mama's back now" said Warda turned off his phone and immediately called the driver to prepare the car.
"What's wrong?" santi asked to see that Warda was very panicked .
"Khanza has given birth" she said then hurriedly left quickly leaving Santi who still did not understand the situation.
"I how?" Shouted Santi.
"If you want to come, please go home now" said Warda.
Santi who saw Warda in a hurry also followed the iron.
"Why the hell have to rush, we can see his grandson anytime," Santi's mind does not know if the condition if now is precarious.
*****
After a while the operating room light went off marked the operation was completed.
Abizar went straight to the door when the doctor came out.
"Doctor, how is my wife?" abizar asked looking expectantly at the Doctor.
"My wife had severe bleeding, we stopped the bleeding, but" the doctor said.
"But Why Doctor?" farah asked, hearing the words but somehow immediately made Farah limp to look at the Doctor full of hope.
"But, what Doctor?" abizar asked with a racing heartbeat, staring intently at the Doctor.
"The father's wife fell into a coma" the doctor explained.
"KOMA" said firmly Abizar.
"Doctor'soma?" asked Farah covered her mouth with 2 hands, she could not believe what she had just heard.
"Sorry sir, we've tried our best."
"Do your best, you say, whether my wife's condition can be said to be good. You said if my wife was in a coma, Doctor. You say you have done your best, this is what you say is best," Abizar snapped pulling the collar of the doctor's shirt.
Fahri immediately stopped Abizar, trying to keep him away from the doctor.
Fahri knew, at this time he could see if his boss was in an emotional state.
"Sorry doctor" Fahri said.
"It's okay, sir. We understand" said the doctor. Not only this time he got such treatment, but he understood all that they did out of affection for the person they had just operated on. They do that only in an emotional state.
"Doctor when will Khanza recover?" ask Farah.
"It all depends on the patient, sometimes the patient can be conscious in 3 days, a week, a month, we can not determine the time for sure. We can only help from the outside with drugs and some therapies."
"Thank you Doctor, I beg you to do your best for Khanza."
"Together, Mom! you will continue to try and do your best for the patient" said the doctor and passed away.
"Aahhhhh" cried Abizar, spilling his frustration, he even punched the hospital wall until his hands dripped with red liquid.
Not just once, he punched the hospital wall to vent all his emotions.
Abizar sat on the floor, leaning his head against the wall of the hospital while constantly bumping his head. Once again he has hurt his loved ones, he has hurt Khanza without him knowing.
"Mas, stop. What with this attitude will solve the problem, will make Khanza recover," said Farah who saw Abizar again standing and punching the hospital wall.
"This whole thing is my fault. I'm an irresponsible husband, I'm a jerk, I can't protect Khanza."
"Yes Mas, you're such a jerk and irresponsible," said Farah, wanting to curse her husband. However, seeing her husband's current extremely frustrated condition it was impossible for her to add to her burden, adding to her husband's guilt. He should have tried to calm her down.
Long they sat speechless with their own thoughts, Abizar with thoughts of what Khanza's current condition is, how to explain it to his grandparents who are coming tomorrow, and how to explain it to his grandparents, farah continued to think about how the new baby was born by Khanza.
Khanza has been transferred to the treatment room, Abizar walked in slowly, seeing the condition of his wife who was lying in the patient's bed with several medical devices attached to her body.
Abizar clasped Khanza's hand tightly.
"Darling, wake up can you hear me?" abizar said, closing his lips to Khanza's ear, whispering so that his wife could hear him and be aware.
Doctors suggested that frequent direct communication with Khanza to encourage him to be quickly aware of his coma.
Abizar kissed the back of Khanza's hand petting him affectionately,
"Khanza get up, wake up baby. Don't you want to see our baby, you gave birth to a very handsome baby very much like me. Thank you for giving me the most beautiful gift for me, wake up we take care of him together" Abizar said in a trembling voice, as much as possible he held the turmoil in his chest wanting it to feel as if he was crying out to release the tightness in his chest. However, he must remain firm.
No response from Khanza, his hands still felt limp in Abizar's grip. Abizar gently stroked Khanza's hair, giving a kiss on her forehead sticking her forehead with Khanza's forehead.
"Honey I please open your eyes, look I see our son, he must really need you at this time" said Abizar who still stuck his forehead on Khanza's forehead.
Without Abizar it is known that there are tears falling from the corner of Khanza's eye with his eyes still closed.
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Will Khanza be aware ????
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