Sharing Love: Loving Myself And Herself

You're just for me.

During the day Abizar invited grandfather to walk around the village and they stopped by his grandfather's garden, saw his grandfather's vegetable plants. 

"The majority in this village are farmers huh, Kek? tanya Abizar saw the expanse of rice that stretched so wide as far as the eye could see, the green expanse of freshly planted rice was very refreshing to the eye.

"Yes, Grandpa also has a rice field, but the feet are not able to take care of it, just plant some vegetables that Grandpa can do. The crops can be sold to neighbors as well as fruit crops."

"Is that enough to fund grandfather's day-to-day?" ask Abizar.

Grandfather laughed, "Of course it's not enough, it's just so that grandfather doesn't stay at home. Grandpa wants to keep working while he can, even if the results are a little bit that is enough. At least grandfather has income and does not burden children. Working even though not much, but grandfather lucky grandfather has good children and grandchildren who always send grandfather money even though not how much. Many grandfather friends who have successful children in the city, they live with a jungle of treasure, but they forget their parents in the village. Let's look at that father over there," pointed the grandfather at an old man who was seen squatting cleaning the grass in his rice field. "His daughter lives in the city, she has 2 children.  He sold all his possessions to send his children to school, but look what they did. After success and marriage they forget their parents. They leave and never come back, let alone send money, when they never come to visit their parents for work," said grandfather was concerned to see one of his friends who often complained to him.

"Grandfather is lucky, has children and grandchildren who love him grandfather," continued grandfather.

"What Khanza often sends grandfather money, yes," inner Abizar who feels guilty. As long as they were married he never once remembered that Khanza still had grandparents, substitutes for his parents and never sent a penny to them.

Grandfather and Abizar continued to walk around the plantation picking some ripe fruit to take home while continuing to talk. Grandpa also picked some vegetables for their side dishes later tonight.

Abizar little by little helped grandfather, although he had little trouble walking on the muddy, muddy road.

At home, while Abizar was going to the garden, Khanza chose to rest in his room, he saw a photo album of his late parents. Khanza rubbed the picture slowly where his parents smiled sweetly while holding him who was three or four years old. He looks so very happy in his Papa's fist.

So many photos of Khanza together with his father and mother when he was a child.

"Whether I can raise my own baby, I can feel what it's like to not have the affection of both parents even though they left me when I was an adult.

Khanza still remembers how the figure of papa who was so valuable in his life as a child, Khanza is closer to his Papa than his mother. Khanza was so spoiled by his Papa, suddenly he felt afraid that the baby would not get the love of Abizar, his father. What if his son would ask him why he separated him from his father, what answer should I give.  The questions made it more difficult for him to part from Abizar's sidekick.

Khanza flinched when he heard the door of the room open with, quickly he turned around and saw Who was coming.

"Sister, Abi" said Khanza, who saw Abizar in a very dirty dress.

"I want to take a shower, give me my clothes" Abizar said.

"Where's my brother from?" khanza asked who saw Abizar's condition.

"I went for a walk with my grandfather" Abizar replied, taking his clothes given by Khanza.

"Do I need some water?" tanyakanya.

"No need, rest I can alone," Abizar said then passed out.

Khanza took the picture he had seen.

Abizar who had taken a bath approached him.

"I made you coffee, brother," said Khanza to come out. But Abizar clasped his arm and asked him to sit next to her..

Abizar looked closely at Khanza.

"What do you mean this morning, answer grandma's question if we're gonna stay here longer."

Khanza was silent and lowered.

Abizar lifted Khanza's chin so that he could look back at her, "Tell me, what do you mean earlier, are you planning to stay here?"

"Yes, Brother. I want to stay here" he answered briefly.

"What do you mean you want to stay here and what about me?"

"No, I can go back!"

"Back, it's that easy you said I could come back?"

"Sister has Brother Farah who will take care of brother, brother can come at any time if you want to visit me" said Khanza with a trembling voice. 

"Do you think I can part with you, with you. Khanza, do you realize what you're saying? Soon you will give birth to my son, our son. Don't tell me you're going to give birth here and that baby clothes you're under are clothes for our baby?!"

Khanza started sobbing,

"Sorry Kak, Khanza can no longer live at home with Mbak Farah. Sister Farah is a good person, she always does good to me, pay attention to me. I've taken it like my own brother, but Sangt is sick knowing that Farah's mother is also Brother's wife, I can't help it, Brother. I beg you to relieve me of this suffering, all this has really hurt me" Khanza said, pleading with tears.

"Khanza believe me, I love you so much. I'm not gonna let you get away from me."

"Sister, I love you a lot, too, but I can't help it, brother," Khanza said.

"Khanza, don't be like this. I'll do what you ask, well we'll stay here" Abizar said, clutching Khanza's hand.

Khanza smiled bitterly. "Aren't you sure you can stay here forever?" khanza looked at Abizar.

Abizar.

"Sister, I know my sister loves me and also that Farah, I believe you can share love fairly. But my heart is not as strong as Farah's who can accept this reality."

"Khanza, good thoughts, think of our son. He needs both of us."

"I'm really sick, brother. Why didn't you be honest in the first place if you were married. Do you know, I love my sister very much, my heart is broken hearing this bitter reality, my heart feels sliced when my sister sleeps with Farah's mother. If you think I'm selfish, I'm selfish. I don't want you to be in touch with Farah, I want you to be mine, your heart and body are mine" Khanza said, no longer able to contain her cries. 

Abizar brought Khanza to his arms,

"Don't be like this," he said, further strengthening his embrace.

"You're bad, brother. You're evil. My heart aches, I don't want to be separated from you, but I don't want to feel this pain all my life, every pain every time I see you and Farah together. Imagining what I'm going through is also Farah's experience." Khanza's body trembled letting out all the tightness in his chest.   

Abizar doesn't know what to say.

The sound of knocking on the door blew away their pain. Khanza forgot that his grandmother and grandfather could hear his cries.

"Khanza what's wrong, you're fine" said the grandmother from behind the door.

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Greetings from me Author m anha 😘

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