Be aground

A loud voice

During my time at Maktuo's house, Arjun and I didn't call each other. Usually Arjun calls me if I don't tell him. His heart must have been very hurt. It's not her habit to ignore me like this.

I also feel pain. My heart felt like it was being forced out of its sockets. Leave a very empty space. My heart suddenly quiet. Just this time I felt the absence of Arjun this sick. Being used to being with her always makes me never feel alone. Maybe all this time, not only did Arjun need me, I needed his presence as well.

It's a good thing that my mother's presence made me a little bit able to shake off all thoughts about Arjun. This morning, my mom took me to the park where Vienna used to take me. Mother really tries to maintain a healthier lifestyle. Every morning routine exercise, diet changes. Mother chose to be vegan, to suppress the growth of her cancer cells.

If the condition is stable for the next three months, the mother will be scheduled for surgical removal of cancer that has currently spread to the abdominal organs. He was really excited to be able to undergo the operation, although doctors have stated that the success of the operation is only thirty percent.

"Thirty pesen is big, Run. I'm gonna keep fighting even if mom's only one percent." Mother said firmly. "You help with the do'a so we can get out of this problem" said the mother then gently.

"Yes, Mom. I always pray for my mother. I want to be back with Mom in Bandung like I used to." I was stuck when I said it.

"There is no need to be sad. God gave us this ordeal, for we are able to receive it," comforted mother stroked me gently.

I tried hard to hold back so as not to cry so that mother also did not have to be sad. I tightly embraced my mother's body. Feeling the comfort of the body of the woman who had fought for my life from the first I breathed into the world.

"Kok cry?" Mom pushed my body slowly from her embrace. Smiling at me who was no longer able to hold back the dam of tears.

"In the meantime, Runa will join KKN, will not be able to see mother for a long time." I gave you an excuse.

"Can't still call."

"Hopefully Runa is placed in a village where there is still a signal hpnya, Mom. Listen, there's also a placement in a village that's hard to signal." Suddenly I remembered the experience of a level brother who had undergone a Real Work Lecture in a village far from adequate facilities, let alone cellular signals, electricity was not there.

"No need to worry about what hasn't happened. The fear can poison the mind, unhealthy thoughts affect the health of the body" said the mother.

My admiration for my mother increased. Not the slightest trial given by God made him discouraged. Always think positive in any situation.

I hugged my mother tighter, not wanting to let go. If allowed, I want to be with Mom like this forever. Spend the rest of the time together without worrying about anything.

"Mother also prayed, Runa the same Arjun can keep on good terms after this, huh. Hopefully you can find a partner who is equally loving as now." the sentence conveyed by the mother suddenly makes the empty space again present.

"Yes, Mom," I muttered in my mother's arms. I don't want this sadness to get worse. It doesn't matter to some park visitors who occasionally steal a glance at us. It might seem strange two people hugging in the middle of the park.

"Why aren't you here anymore?"

I let go of my embrace. Think for a moment to explain it to my mom.

"She hasn't seen her dad in a long time, maybe they're spending time together." I forced a smile, to remove the doubt from the sentence I said myself.

"Oh, so? Hopefully not because of yesterday." Mother returned my smile, pulled me back into her arms, gently rubbed my back.

No one else spoke between us. The sun is starting to rise. Visitors to the park, which was once crowded, began to look lonely. Only a few continued to run around the park.

"Go home, yuk!" take mom after a brief pause.

We left the park.

***

This is my last day in Jakarta, I should have called Arjun from yesterday to ask about our return to Bandung. But until now, there has been no incoming message from Arjun. Trying to budge, I took my phone to contact Arjun.

Just now I'm going to press the contact icon, the call from Arjun comes in. I took a deep breath before shifting the sign of receiving the call. Trying to ease feelings that feel chaotic.

"Hello, Juni." I greeted him, trying to sound ordinary.

"Yes, so. What time do you want to leave?" I glanced at the clock on the wall. At ten.

"I'm picking up, huh?"

"If before zuhur come here, may? Nanyain Lo's mother. I don't know when I'll see you again, right? At least help me make your heart happy, this time." I delivered my request, more like a plea.

I don't want to make you worry about thinking about my problems with Arjun, at least you can see we're going to be okay through this.

"Alright," he said, sounding heavy. "Yes, I'm walking now then," he continued.

"Okay, I'm cleaning up first."

Arjun ended the call. I was stunned for a moment. After this, what else will I do. Is it true that everything will be fine, or Arjun will disappear from my life. Make it an obsolete record that was once in my story. Just remembering it makes me sick.

"Why, Run?" My mother was suddenly beside me.

"Eh ... Just called Arjun, want to walk here." back forced smiles adorned my lips.

"Will you come back this afternoon?" My new mother takes a shower, sits next to me. The fruity aroma of the shampoo his mother wore was soothing.

"Yes, fear is too late as well until the bandung, ma'am." Actually I still want to linger with mom. But right now my mind feels split. I want to talk about how I'm going to continue my relationship with Arjun.

"Oh, yes. Also true. Yes already. There's been cleaning up."

***

At eleven, Arjun has arrived. Bi Sumi opened the door. When I went down to see him, he was talking to my mother. His face looked ordinary, responding to mother's jokes as usual. Nothing seems to have changed from the way she talked to her mother. Maybe he was able to accept the truth.

We left the maktuo house after lunch, forcing us to eat before we left. Although the atmosphere when eating feels awkward, but it seems that Arjun is trying to behave normally.

I was still looking at the mother who took me off in front of the fence until the figure of the mother was no longer visible when the car turned out of the maktuo housing complex. I leaned my back, trying to sit as comfortably as possible next to Arjun.

"Run, we don't have to break up. Let's just keep this relationship going." I gasped to hear Arjun speak, I turned my gaze from the outside, looking at him.

"That's, Jun?" I was trying to digest what Arjun said.

"Gue can't separate. If it must be removed from custom, justin. After all, all this time we also do not know our ancestral land. We have lived in Sundanese soil for a long time, why else should we think about the issue of our ancestral vows first" he said without looking at me.

"Gue can't, Jun. The Nyokap family still holds firm to the customs of our village. I can't break what's clearly forbidden."

"Run, while we're not violating the rules of religion, it doesn't matter, does it? How could I immediately erase the feelings that have existed for years." Arjun's voice began to rise.

"Certain .. Lo doesn't mean it matters if I become hostile to my family because I maintain this relationship?" ask me to clarify the proposal.

She's quiet. Seemed thinking. His jaw hardened, then snorted.

"We're just trying to go back to having a day like before, Jun. We go back to the beginning, when we were friends." It was easy for me to say that sentence, but my heart was unable to accept it.

"Can you?" His voice sounded cynical.

"Gue doesn't know yet, let's just try."

Arjun bit his lip. No more answering what I said. The wound was clearly imprinted on his net. I'm sorry, Jun. It's not easy to get through all this. I can't even imagine how my life will be going after this. Obviously, everything will no longer be the same.