Be aground

Unconcerned

Everything made me feel claustrophobic, the theatrics even the games they did to me made me like a fool who was easily played by them. I followed the lines they played. I let them play on the wounds they give, and then end with an apology and a lie.

*****

I waited for the night, hoping that everything he said was the truth, because I hoped that everything that happened was just a misunderstanding that we could resolve. I can't say anything right now, but it all makes me think but not know where it's going. The night had come, I came back to the place where they were together.

At that moment I looked back at how the two of them were in this place. Pain well really really hurt, even my tears couldn't represent my heart back then. The tears that were supposed to calm my heart, did not drip at all. Eventually, the woman contacted Dika

“Phone”

“Where, later come to kost gak ?” said the woman with ease

“Yes I came kok” said Dika gently

When I heard that, my heartache deepened, even they were joking with each other laughs. The woman proudly showed off their affection in front of me, I who could no longer properly digest the situation was just smiling sweetly at their behavior. When Dika came, the door knocked gently and Dika called out her name gently.

Ah, am I wrong to come to this place?” I said in the inner

At that moment the woman opened the door and let Dika in

“You ya” said Dika who immediately saw me right behind the door

“Why silence, what do you want to say ?” say

When she saw the woman, she was silent to see me

“By sister out, I want to talk to her?” say

“Why should I go out” said the woman

“Can sister come out no ?” say

“Wah, I live here, but I came out ya” said the woman while out

“Are you happy ?” say

Dika remained silent and did not want to say anything

“Why, shouldn't you explain to me. But why do I have to pursue explanations from you Dika” said I submit

Dika remained silent

“I'm the one who got hurt here, I'm the one you betrayed, I'm the one you lied to, but I have to endure it all by pursuing your explanation, why? What's wrong with me Dika, why are you doing all this to me?” I said while crying down

Dika just look at me, without saying anything even let me cry alone

“I hope for you, but you destroy that hope” I said.

At that moment the woman came back in and saw us

“I hope everything you do is felt by adekmu” I said

Dika quickly looked at me and wanted to hit me, and then the woman said

“Don't Dika, hold your emotions” said the woman

“Hahahaha, it turns out that you guys have been together for a long time, even you listen more to him talk than I did from earlier talk” I said while sitting away from Dika

They were silent then and there and the silence made me tired

“Alright, if this is what you want. I won't bother you, I already know that you do like it while I mean nothing to you. Thank you Dika, you made me low in the eyes of you and that woman. I say” I said who immediately stood up and went from that place.

On that trip, I was like a fool who cried and did not know the direction. I stepped foot hoping that everything was just a dream. But it turns out that the more I put my foot on the dark path, the more I felt crushed. Even the pain I could not describe clearly, pain, tightness, disappointment, crumbling united in my dark night. Like wanting to end everything and get hurt alone in a sickening relationship