Love, Let it Get Lost

I sacrifice for Kara

On the way home, Nicko and I kept quiet and didn't talk. Nicko was serious about the steering wheel and his views on the street, and I just kept looking out the window. I was reluctant to talk to him, and he was reluctant to start arguing back with me.

“Ma” call Kara sitting in the back seat.

“Iya dear” I said while looking back and smiling at him.

“Can Kara play in the park first before going home?” Ask Kara.

The park is a children's playground that he often visited with Gilbran nephew of Keysa.

I glanced at Nicko for a moment, he was still silent.

“Sayang. We go there later, yes, it's late afternoon and tomorrow Kara should go to school”

“But Maa.”

“Kara son well right?” My question cuts Kara's complaint.

“Iya Ma” Kara replied sadly.

“Then Kara has to obey Mama ya” said me sweetly so she can obey me.

Then Kara just kept quiet in disappointment.

“We go to the park now” Nicko said without looking at me.

“No need, it's afternoon. We go home”

“I don't want to see Kara sad like that” Nicko said.

“It's already afternoon.”

“You're a good mother right?” Ask Nicko with a ketus.

She taunted me by quoting my words that were said to Kara.

“Ya” answer me briefly.

“Then don't make Kara disappointed like that, we can play for a while before night”

I was silent at his orders. I don't want to disappoint Kara, but I'm just tired, tired of everything I've just been through, I just want to rest.

We got to the park Kara wanted us to go.

“We arrived at the park” exclaimed Nicko smilingly looking back at the seat.

“We're in the park?” Ask Kara doesn't believe it.

“Iya dong's. Mama is good, so make it possible Kara play here” said Nicko.

“Thanks Ma”

I just kept smiling silently to Kara.

Nicko leads Kara to a playground in the middle of a large field. There are so many people around there who are exercising, taking pictures, there are also just having a picnic eating on green grass,also the children who are so cheerful roam in the children's playground located in the middle of the park.

The playground is just like any other playground. There is a sand game complete with scopes and buckets, there are also seesaws, slides, wooden houses, ivory bridges and many others. Kara was very happy if I brought her here since she was 3 years old until now, because the location is not far from my apartment.

Kara immediately runs to the playground joining the other children she may not recognize. Although they do not know each other but they can look directly familiar when playing together, especially with fellow girls, they will definitely feel one frequency.

Nicko and I stood next to the playground, and watched Kara closely, afraid that something might happen to her.

“You can go home Nick, let Kara I take care of myself” said I still want Nicko to go.

He looked at me with annoyance.

“Why do you want me to go?” Ask Nicko.

“I just asked you to go home, and rest”

“Iya why? You feel uncomfortable with my presence?”

“Not so, I just feel like I can take care of Kara myself!”

“Until when?!” Nicko asked in annoyance, making me flinch and fall silent at him.

“Until when do you think you can take care of Kara yourself?” Ask her again.

I started to look confused by a question that was so hard for me to answer.

“Do not because you think you have managed to raise Kara yourself until now, making you feel able to continue re-raising her own”

“That way won't be forever small Fawnia. He will grow up, one day he will ask me where I am, he will also find out about me, he will continue to wonder why I was not there to accompany him all his life. You think I'll let all that happen to Kara?”

I turned my face away.

“No Faw. I would never make Kara like that. I will continue to accompany him from now until later. And I will continue to play my role as Dad for her, even though Kara still calls me with a poignant ‘Om’” call to hear Nicko say that.

I also felt how in his position, could know about his son, but his son did not know the truth.

I don't want Kara to know about Nicko, because he's still vulnerable plain, and of course I don't want to be the subject of his oma opa questions.

“I never forbid you to tell the truth to Kara” I said sadly to him.

“I don't want to. If it wasn't you who told Kara” yourself Nicko made me so heavy.

The day is starting to get late. The sun was almost gone, all the little children who played around there one by one went out of the park with their parents, Kara saw her other friends coming home, she said, and he came home too.

Kara ran towards me, and I bowed to welcome her.

“It's done?” Ask me sweetly.

“Already Ma. Thank you Ma” sweet Kara then kissed my cheek.

I smiled at his romance.

Kara looked at Om Nicko who was standing next to me. Nicko looked at Kara with his lips together. Then Kara pulls Nicko's arm saying that he asked Nicko to crouch down to compensate for his height. Nicko obeyed the wishes of his little daughter.

Kara kissed Nicko's cheek. It made me wonder how sweet this kid is.

“Thanks Yes Om Nicko” said Kara by still calling Nicko as her ‘Om’.

Nicko kissed Kara's cheek.

“Sama-sama Kara” reply Nicko adorable.

“Let's go home” invite Nicko to hold Kara's tiny hand.

And I held Kara's hand on the other side. We walked three of us to the car park. Kara was the reason we laughed, and she was the reason we were able to stay together. We love her.

Arriving in the basement. Nicko carried Kara to our room, while I carried Nciko's bags and belongings to the room.

“Om Nicko not staying?” Ask Kara who's in her sling.

I raised both my halis hearing Kara's question.

Nicko smiled at Kara. Then I held Kara so she would keep up with Nicko's height.

“Om Nicko should go home first Darling. Om Nicko still no work”

“When Om sleeps again with Kara?”

Nicko glanced at me coldly, I glanced at him in confusion.

“Later if Mama has allowed ya Nak”

“Mama is definitely permission, right Ma?” Ask Kara to me.

“Iya darling. But today Om Nicko must go home first, later he will definitely nemenin again Kara bobo”

“Appointment?” Kara asked, pointing her index finger.

“Janji”

“Janji” answered me and Nicko simultaneously and wrapped our index finger in Kara's tiny index finger.

I was surprised that we accidentally wrapped our index fingers together, so that the three of us were related. I looked at Nicko reflexively and Nicko looked at me coldly.

“Yee appointment threesome” exclaim Kara with pleasure.

Then we both let go of our index finger.

“Om go home first, and Om promises to return”

“Iya Om,How to wait ya”

Nicko kissed Kara on the cheek again, and then she kissed my lips sweetly. She was so sweet towards me and Kara, she also did not hesitate to always kiss my lips like this in front of Kara.