My Love is Wrong

Fix you

It's the third day I have a fever. I still feel powerless. And somehow not only the body that lemes tp my soul also lemes. It's like I have no desire.

I hajya want to cry and sleep. I felt like my life was going to end. I don't know what pain I'm in

"Ma... We'll go to the doctor again." Husband says.

I just shook my head.

"Ma... Mama is so pale. Mama's body is also drastically down, and her fever is also not down." Said my husband who was touching my forehead. He looks worried on his face.

I shook my head again.

Then my husband sat by my bed and looked at me. I just caught a glimpse of it with a blank look.

"Ma... Papa seriously, please let's go to the doctor again tonight. Yes .."

"Pa... Mama doesn't want to, sorry Mama. Mama is better. Mom's better tomorrow." I said quietly while hugging my roll.

" Ma, how do you want to get well. Eating Mama is hard. Eat only 1 spoon, do not use side dishes only use vegetables. Later tonight we go to the doctor... Let Mama get well."

I just shut up and closed my eyes. I am lazy to argue.

My husband finally came out of my room.

My eyes were closed, but my mind went to Pram. I don't know why I lost my energy and desire. I don't know what pain I am. But I think maybe because I have a high fever for up to 3 days that makes me not energetic body and soul.

My phone's ringing, I don't know whose call it is. I didn't accept it, because I wanted to sleep.

The afternoon I woke up, my fever had started to wane. I took my phone. I saw no message from Pram, but when I saw the status, I saw the Pram status.

Pram's status contains a poem about the restlessness of a lover.

"I love you Pram... " Bathinku's.

I can feel Pram's uneasiness and worry. "I'm sorry Pram...My soul and my body are very weak pram." I said in my heart. I don't feel my tears dripping.

I want to heal quickly, I encourage myself. I tried to wake up from my sleep and then I walked slowly to the kitchen .

I took rice and side dishes and vegetables. I just haven't dared a big portion. Because it still feels nauseous and bitter

"Ma... Can I go to the kitchen by myself? " Ask my husband.

I smile.

Azka greeted me from behind me.

" Well, is your mom better?" Azka asked and sat in the front seat of the dining table.

I nodded and smiled.

We talked about the pain I felt. Soon I entered Kama again.

In my room I saw my phone being hacked. I miss Pram, but I have no power of soul and my body is weak.

"Ma... Papa went to the post office. There's something Papa takes care of for a second." Husband says.

"Yes Pa, be careful on the road."

"Yeah, Mama don't do much activity first. Mama Istrihat aja yaa."

I'm mrngangguk. Then my husband left.

I saw Pram's profile picture. A face with eyes full of sadness. Then I opened Pram's social media.

I saw Pram update his status last night. The status is titled "Fix You" turns out the lyrics of the song Fix You ~ Coldplay

When you try your best, but you don't succeed

When you get what you want, but not what you need

When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep

Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone, but it goes to waste

Could it be worth?

Lights will guide you home

Ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

And high up above, or down below

When you're too in love to let it go

If you never try, you'll never know

Just what you're worth

I wept. "Pram, keep up the spirit for me." bathinku.