My Love is Wrong

I'm sorry

It was as if I was struck by a tickle hearing my husband say such a thing. I am the woman he always adored now must accept the words spicy, sick and shameful.

I was wrong, but I didn't want to. I just kept quiet to hear what my husband said that really cornered me. Besides, Pipin's words were still ringing in my ears with all the painful poisons.

I accept everything God, because I know I'm wrong.

I was sending the poem because I thought it was still at the event that his boss was hosting. It did not occur to me if it turns out Pram was already at home.

I blame myself, I ruined Pram's life. I don't think about my life because I live with my husband because of compulsion.

I was often disappointed with my husband's extended family who often interfered in my household. All my uneg-uneg have been conveyed to my husband, but ultimately I have to accept whatever the reality and attitude of his family is sometimes arbitrary. Yes, this is my fate.

People around me never know how the ripples in my household from the beginning I got married until now. All I was quiet, until I thought that I was just a slave to fate. And these words that Pram dislikes very much. And Pram forbade me to say that again.

"Ma... Explain to me why all this could happen. Arghhh.... " My husband growled while clenching his hand. My husband sat by my bed.

"I'm sorry Pa..." I try not to cry. I don't want to cry in front of my husband.

"Why can you relate to people's husbands. I did not expect!!! Pram's wife sent me a message. He told me everything. And she also told me to teach you not to take her husband. Are you ashamed of it??? Huh!!!" Husband says.

I just shut up while looking down.

" You heard nothing! Answer my question! What is my lack? "

" I thought your relationship was over when Pram talked to me. But it turns out that until now it is still yaa... Aarghbhh... "

" lt... I will not defend myself. Because whatever I'm saying now is useless. I explained anything still was pointless. So I thought about not being clear about anything. Tomorrow when it's quiet I'll explain everything."

"I was surprised, and I really didn't expect Ma...Then tomorrow we go to your mother's place. I'll tell you everything. Let mama know how you're doing." Husband says.

"I beg you not to. I don't want to hurt my mom's heart, and please think carefully about everything Papa's gonna do."

"I'm ready if Papa will look at me, I understand and I'll accept Pa. But please it's enough to get here, enough between me and Papa. Please don't involve mom and the kids." Then I looked down and kept trying to calm down.

My husband was silent for a while.

"Ma... I love your ma. I really love you ma. Honestly, this shit makes me forget myself I can kill you because it's Ma. I can kill you!!!". My husband said while looking at me with anger.

I looked at my husband.

"Please Pa. If you want to kill me, go ahead. I'm sincere, I told Papa I never had hope for my life. Do Pa, what Papa thinks is good and can be relieved." I looked at my husband.

My naturals are about to fall, but I hold them.

"I'm serious Ma!!! I am very disappointed with your attitude and betrayal. I didn't expect. Why after decades of marriage now you do this! I'm disappointed Ma!!! "

"I'm sorry Pa..." My tears were dripping, but I instantly erased I tried not to cry and remained calm.

I'm sincere whatever will happen. I give everything to the will of my Lord.