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Thresholds

Renjana Kanya's

The sound of tools attached to Mama's body again made me shed tears. The woman's body has been lying weakly in the ICU since post-surgery yesterday. Her body looked skinny from the last time I saw her. Even his fingers, which used to be flattened, now only skin and bones remain. I don't know if the wound has changed him much. What a heart I have had all this time that has turned a blind eye to the fact that the woman was also hurt. We both hugged lara.

I stared at Mama's face which still looked ayu. The woman - who had mostly passed on her face, nose and lips to me - had not yet opened her eyes. Even so, Mama was so peaceful in her sleep. As if not disturbed by the sound of tools that seemed to scream in my ears.

Especially when in the silence of the night. The sound of the tools is more frightening than even the fastest hour seconds. Or even at the slowest. The second of the hour, sooner or later, still feels scary to me if it's the thing about waiting. Especially if you are waiting alone.

I forced Eka and Araz's father home and insisted on looking after Mama last night. Even though Eka's father promised to call immediately if Mama had kissed. I don't wanna hear. I want the first thing Mama sees when she opens her eyes. Or at least the so-called name when a woman's eyes are still asleep.

I always begged and wished that she would open her eyes so that I could apologize for my mistakes. Of all selfishness or perhaps unforgivable mistakes. And, Mama still closed her eyes. Not at all disturbed in his deep sleep.

"Ma, good sleep? Mama doesn't miss the same, Anya? Do you want to meet Baby Boy? I asked Anya who gave me a name. Can you give me a name, Victor? From the word victory. Because he's the one who's finally the winner, Ma. The universe is centered on him. All lara, disappointed or whatever it was, it just vanished just by looking at her face."

I smile. Removing the tears that had not yet dried on my face. I'll leave the children with Mama's hair blocking her father's face. Wrinkles on the woman's face, did not reduce the beauty that became berkahanya so far.

"He looks exactly like my son. Same as well. How could that be, Ma? The shape of the face, his small nose pointed, also his tiny lips, very similar to Anya. Same mom too. Keep the shape of his cheekbones, his eyes, also a pair of eyebrows that shade him look very similar to the Son. That means he looks like Dad.

Oh yes, Anya has received an apology from Om Eka. Anya will also call you from now on. Nothing ‘kan, if Anya call Dad and different from the Son or Baby Boy later? He doesn't usually call Papa. His tongue Anya strangely uttered Papa. I agree that Anya called him not Papa.

Sorry Anya, yes Ma. Anya has always been a child who is not devoted to Mama. Anya stubborn, but that ingetin same nature Mama no anyway? Dad used to separate us often when we were both colossal when arguing. But thanks to that one thing is realized, after all, will not the fruit fall far from the tree?

Mom woke up quickly. Don't sleep long. Don't take a long break. Anya, miss Mama. Anny ... ."

Sentences interrupted. I could no longer continue the word for the turbulent feeling in my chest. My eyes blurred. Tears are overpowering me faster.

The sadness crept quickly. It held me back from being able to move freely and always pulled me back to a dark corner called regret. Throwing out my joints that somehow since when can not be invited to stand upright. Even my body feels weaker. Until I felt everything was completely dark and my body collapsed with nothing to hold back.

***

"Doctor said, you're short of fluids. Your blood pressure is also low, so you faint. Fortunately there was a nurse who knew when checking the condition of Aunt Sukma. You should also rest if you are tired, Kanya. Don't push yourself."

Araz nagged as Dad said to go to Mama's room after making sure I didn't complain about anything. Things he never did all this time. Usually the man always seems calm and never shows his virginity to a thing. Just this time Araz looked so irritated when he found out I was down from exhaustion. Even so, the worried look he could not hide from his face.

"If you are sick like this, how can you take care of Aunt Sukma? When was the last time you had a drink?"

"Eat-drink?" I repeated Araz's question like a teenage girl who was suddenly stupid when she first felt in love and the feeling was greeted with a date from the chatter.

"When was the last meal or maybe a drink? Why get dehydrated?" Araz repeated the question impatiently.

"Yesterday, lunch is like Mas Araz, as he was," I replied innocently without the slightest sense of sin. While Araz furiously ruffled my hair.

"Well, how do you take care of Aunt Sukma if you do not want to take care of her health?"

I smile. Every day more and more things I know about Araz. About how patient the man was. About his skill in processing ingredients into delicious food. About how he matures when he behaves. When you are jealous of one thing. Up to the pranky attitude I just saw a few seconds ago.

Seeing the edge of my lips expanding, Araz looked at me with the look of his shady, but also sharp eyes simultaneously. His eyes are getting narrowed. Then pinch my cheek.

"I'm angry Anya, I'm worried about you. Not that you're joking. Why even smile?"

"Oh yeah? I just found out this is an angry person who just looks funny rather than serem. Araz wasn't the wrong expression, was he?" my question made Araz squint more and more at me. Trying to look creepy or maybe scary in front of me which actually looks adorable. My laughter is getting wider. "Hahaha .. sorry, sorry, I swear, Mas Araz doesn't deserve to say that. There is also Mas Hanung tuh who is fast on display the face of the fierce ass. He likes to be angry at the office. Same with me only when the puzzle order comes."

Pt ...

Speech ceased. Araz kissed my lips and looked at me intensely. Our eyes were locked on each other. However, he had no intention of continuing the act that had lured the butterflies flying at the bottom of my stomach.

"If you've reached your limit, rest, Kanya. I don't want you to get sick. You should always be healthy to support the recovery of Aunt Sukma," he said again soften while tucking the children's hair behind my ears. A male smile expands before our lips meet again.