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Hallucinations

Renjana Kanya's

My eyes blinked. Staring at the figure in front of the door that disappeared in an instant. Even when I ran to make sure that the figure was real, the results were the same. I didn't find him. It was completely gone when I blinked my eyes.

Heh, it seems like I'm going crazy. Even when I was awake, I could see Araz so real. Worse, the figure also answered the question that I spewed so clearly on Mas Hanung.

God, how could this feeling be so excruciating?

"Lo why the hell?" Mas Hanung who followed me to the lobby of the building looked at me in wonder.

If I told him, I saw Araz's shadow standing at the door of his room and answered the question I had told Mas Hanung earlier, how would my leader respond? Would he laugh at me and think I was crazy? If not, he'll definitely conclude that I like Araz. Maybe he will tease me if the hallucinations I experience are due to longing feelings.

"I think I'm hallucinating" I answered briefly with tears to keep from crying. I went back to the elevator. Leaving Mas Hanung who was still standing in the office lobby.

"What drama did you play with Pimred?" ask Deni as soon as I get back to my cubicle. He seemed to have completed the script target today and gossiped with Vina at the woman's table.

"Not seen you just had a thief? I'm going after it" I replied accordingly. Deni just glanced and threw the pea skin at me.

"The longer the more nervous people are. Less sesajen lo?" asked Deni only I replied with a forced smile. "Why Vin, you often mess around?"

"You know, I wonder too. Fall in love again."

"So, where there's falling in love makes a frenzy. Same thing with it." Deni's comments responded to Vina's statement. They were just involved in a fight that did not interest me at all.

My mind is still full of crazy things that just happened a few minutes ago. I can imagine Araz so real. Heh, I really think I'm starting to go crazy. Is my mind filled with that man that makes me unable to think clearly?

If I knew it would be like this, I would have chosen not to know him. The pain that the man left behind was worse than knowing the fact that the Son became my stepbrother. There was a pain and aching that I could not express through words. It makes my heart ache just by hearing or saying his name.

"him, jaelah. Dreaming of people. How, come tonight?" Vina's voice broke my daydream about Araz.

"Eh?"

"Well, really dream of him. How, will malem come? We want clubbing." Deni repeated his invitation.

"Look at ntar. I don't know if there will be an event after this" I said without the mood.

"Wah cenayang lo. This event is certain!" Deni commented when he saw Mas Hanung emerge from his room.

The small circle on Vina's desk collapsed instantly when Mas Hanung reported that there was a continuous accident in the Plaza Senayan area. In some ways, the information once got to Mas Hanung and made his men have to move quickly. I swiftly grabbed my backpack and ran followed by Deni. Although in the heart actually curses, why events occur when the brain and heart do not want to compromise.

***

A pretty bad accident. Starting from one of the cars that lost balance when avoiding a motorcycle that suddenly struck, ended up crashing into one car next to it which then hit two motorcycles and three other cars. One of the bikers who was in contact with his son died on the spot. The seven-year-old survived despite severe shock.

In addition, two of the victims suffered serious bleeding wounds to the head and died en route to a nearby hospital. Others were seriously injured.

This is why I am actually lazy to cover events. Especially accidents. Too draining of emotions and tears. Not to mention dealing with citizens who are already like warta hunters. While we who are reporters actually still measure everything with ethics that must be maintained.

Almost 08:00 p.m., when I was just finished covering the event with a sore body and sticky by sweat. Arriving at home instead of taking a shower, I threw my body in the recess of the living room sofa. Occasionally lazy wriggling to relax muscles that feel stiff.

"If you go home from work, take a shower, don't immediately fall down that way."

My body reflexes vertically when it hears a familiar voice greeting the eardrum. But I did not find the owner of the voice.

"Him, I made you a sandwich. Eat yuk."

This time, the sound was coming from the kitchen. It made me rush towards the source of the sound, but again I only found the frozen air. Without Araz.

Heh, it really seems like I'm getting crazy. Even I can smell the aroma that blends chocolate and mint in the air. Really, I'm getting crazy.

For the sake of casting away the shadow of the man, I walked towards with shaky steps towards the room. It's not the peace I feel. Araz stood on the window sill. Staring at me with a fluffy smile that made the tip of her eyes wrinkle.

"Have a nice dream, Kanya." His voice resonated in my cranium. Making a feeling of pain to difficulty breathing due to holding back the pain.

"If you have the intention to start, don't show up in front of me again, Monkey! I don't need a ghost."

My body is on the floor. Tears can't hold me anymore. My mind aches withstanding excruciating pain. And I don't know what to do to get rid of Araz's shadow that's popping up more and more.

I could only shed tears behind my knees. Let all forms of taste escape from the nesting place or whether hiding all this time.

***

"Good morning, Kanya. Have a great day."

I woke up when I heard someone whispering in my ear. The sunlight that broke through the ventilation gap fell right above my face. If you feel the warmth, maybe this is still around 06:00.

I watched my body move to the bed. The last time I was sitting on my knees crying. Since when did I move? Though I was sure, I fell asleep while crying while bending my knees.

"Morning, Kanya. Want some breakfast sandwiches?"

Suddenly the door of my room opened. A stranger stood in the doorway wearing my apron.

I was smiling cynically. My silence sees Araz continuing.

Heh, look at lo ntar. I'll make a calculation because I've done it day and night.

While Araz's shadow didn't disappear from my bedroom door.