"I'm Tired, I Want to Give Up "

Mother's words are like a pain

After Ashar, I went home. He came to me intentionally and flattered. In his lap Sya struggled spoiled, as if he did not want you to go home.

"Father come home, son! All right here, no more fighting with your husband. Keep the ego and better give up. About your mother-in-law, let it go. Keep appreciating him. If your mother-in-law speaks words that hurt your heart, pray as the Almighty asks for strength. As long as your husband doesn't betray and flirt, I remind you once again, don't leave him. Hang on....!" I said half a whisper.

Hearing you say such a message, makes the sadness in my heart more painful. How not, the attitude of the mother who is cynical and jutek same me and father, if left or even buried can be a wound that will continue to get deeper and gaping. Should I fight? Go back to the advice of the Father, let it be, pray with the Almighty to be given strength.

I took a breath in releasing the Father who was going home. I can't walk to the door, because I can't walk too long. I could only stand from the window and look at the father from afar.

"Tests, tests....!"

My tears fell unbearably looking at my frail body. And given the attitude of the mother who did not consider us at all. What's our fault? Just because we're ordinary people, you don't want to be kind or friendly, at least you're like your father.

I stared at the frail body but it still looked strong until the duck motor disappeared behind the gate. Even though you are getting old, thankfully you are not sick. So that I am not too restless apart from the father, especially I have a younger brother, Nadly who Alhamdulillah very responsible and obedient father and do not bother the father. I'm not too worried about you, Dad.

After a few minutes, my mother came and approached me. Then smile mockingly. I tried my usual and held tightness in the chest.

"Huuhh. make your father's motor sound headache. If you come here do not have to use a rich butut motorbike, the sound IS NOISY....!" mama said while still hanging in our room, while raising the word NOISY.

"I remind you again yes, my son Eagle is always good with your father, because of my upbringing. And you who he said as a son-in-law, have never been nice to me. It could just be refuting. What to expect from a daughter-in-law like you, smart only in bed and refute," she wrote as she passed and left the room.

"Wait Mom, what exactly is wrong with Nada so that Mom hates the same Nada? All this time Nada felt fine with Mom. Nada never hated Mom, even Nada never had a grudge against Mom, even though Mom always insulted and scorned Nada in front of people. Is it wrong if. Nada feels upset with Mom because Mom always insulted Nada? But Nada never thought to hate and grudge the same Mother. If you want to be honest, in fact Nada dear mother like Nada dear father," as I managed to stop the footsteps of the mother.

She turned her head and turned her back to me and said, "don't expect you to get affection from me, because I don't want to be loved by you, you're not the daughter-in-law I expected you to be, you're just a bed woman" he said again and now it's completely gone, leaving me devastated.

Again the bed woman that my mother threw to insult and hurt me. The tears were not held back, my chest tightness and the pain in the stomach exhausted the curette was really painful. I grimaced and cried. Mother's words just now pierced my heart much more painfully than a blow.

Suddenly Mas Eagle came with Sya and approached. I closed my face withstanding the unstoppable cry. Finally my tears spilled and I couldn't help it. The words of the abusive and insulting mother were still ringing clearly in my ears. Mas Eagle grabbed my shoulder and hugged it.

"Mother's stomach hurts again, so Shay not ask first Mother yes." The eagle gave me a reason to cry. And there's a point, my crying is partly because of the pain coming from my stomach.

"Now Bobo Day hours Yes, Sha Bobo at noon first yes accompanied by Bi Narti."

"But.didn't Mommy is sick, I want to accompany Mommy," he said half forcefully.

"No... I have to be bobo noon. Later if Mother is disturbed the pain does not even heal. I want you to get well soon, don't you?" masuk Mas Eagle does not give up.

Finally, after being persuaded by Mas Elang, Sya would take a nap accompanied by Bi Narti, although the look on her face was filled with disappointment.

Stay me and the Eagle. I was still crying and speechless other than spilling sorrow from my mother's words. Mas Eagle tried to comfort me by rubbing my shoulder. If only I did not remember the advice of the father, it would be like I stopped again from the side of Mas Elang as an outlet for my disappointment by my mother. But I won't be able to, considering myself just curettage can't possibly go far.

"Darling..spill all your disappointments on Mama with tears, Mas don't mind being your focus. Mas feel guilty, the arrival of the mother even makes you worse and disappointed. I'm sorry!" said Mas Elang while dipping my hair.

Mas Eagle apologized that means he eavesdropped on our debate here. I don't know what Mas Eagle would do to mom after seeing or eavesdropping on a mother's insulting babble. What's clear is that for some time to come, I'm not ready if I have to meet Mom.

Because of the tiredness of crying and the heavy drowsiness, I fell asleep with Mas Eagle beside me. The sedu sedan still sounded with my shoulders swaying. Maybe I am crying in my sleep right now. So that pain and disappointment carried over to the dream realm.

The time has shown at 7 pm, apparently I slept quite a long time. I glimpsed Mas Eagle on the left side of the bed. Mas Elang looks clean and handsome with cocoa clothes and sarongs underneath. Kaya Mas Elang was reciting with a prayer beads in his hand. I felt overwhelmed by this sight, even though it was not my first time. But when I looked at him there was peace after the rain and the storm.

The Eagle realized that I was awake, and he approached and tried to smile at me. I helped him sit up and leaned over the headboard. The Eagle attentively kissed my forehead whispering, "may God bless and grant you the greatest patience and open the door of forgiveness wide in your heart, God with us. And I have always loved you, my wife," The Eagle concluded his prayer with a long kiss on my forehead.