"I'm Tired, I Want to Give Up "

Get out of the house

Day after day passed, a month after the incident I was caught talking to Ramdan and Romi, Mas Eagle completely changed. His attitude was cold and harsh and would not be denied. When it comes to refuting, since marriage I have never denied Mas Eagle. Just one mistake I made, met Ms. Marisa without waiting for approval from Mas Elang. And right now, I feel that Mas Eagle is overreacting to my insignificant mistake.

Especially if it had mentioned the name of his ex-wife, Mas Eagle was so angry. And I am always the target of his anger. I don't know I always get affected by bad memories made by Mbak Mayang.

"Mas, why since Nada was caught talking to Nada's friends, Ramdan and Romi Mas Eagle's attitude became like this, isn't that already a month ago?" I asked the other day to be brave.

"I'm just punishing you" he replied.

"Why Mas? Has it been too long since I left a tone like this? Isn't Nada's mistake not as fatal as the mistake Mbak Mayang made?" Mas Eagle was silent, slowly he came to me and quickly his hand clutched my jaw firmly, so that I felt pain.

"Don't associate this with that traitor! Or do you want me to kick you out of this house? And do not once again mention that name in front of me or in front of Sya, if you rebel then you will know the consequences," threatened Mas Eagle rough, his breath quickly as if hunting.

"Why Mas, why does every Nada mention the name of Mbak Mayang, Mas is always rude and angry at Nada? Does Mas Eagle still love him?" ask me with a vibrating voice. Mas Eagle approached me, his eyes flushed red implying considerable anger, I was horrified to see him. Then I walked back away from him. But Mas Eagle very quickly grabbed my body and embraced it rough. There was no more tenderness like before when he wanted something.

Slowly the embrace changed a strong grip, making Me a little claustrophobic and coughing.

"Huk, uhuk, uhuk....!"

"Papaaa... What does Papa do with Mother?"

Suddenly Sya came to surprise Mas Eagle who was gripping me strongly. Quickly Mas Elang released his grip and approached Sya. I didn't waste a chance, I immediately ran down the stairs, then headed for the main door and exited. I left the house without thinking of the One who saved Me from the grip of the Eagle.

I stopped a Taxi that happened to be passing by, Taxi stopped and then I got on. "Go sir, just a little quick!" my orders without mentioning my purpose. Mr. Driver obeyed my orders, he immediately drove Taxi a little quickly.

I cried and looked towards the back of the Taxi, afraid that Mas Eagle was chasing me. But not a bit of Mas Eagle's car seemed to be chasing me. My current feeling was between disappointment and relief. Disappointed that Mas Eagle is not chasing me, and relieved that my departure is impossible to catch up with anymore.

10 Minutes passed, the Taxi I was riding was approximately 5 kilometers away from Mas Elang's house. Pretty far. The taxi driver looked back at me who was still crying, he saw me hesitating and feeling sorry.

"Where are you, this is far enough. It's 5 kilometers from where it was, but the Mbaknya has not said where the destination is? If you can tell where the mama is going?" ask the taxi driver carefully.

I woke up, then immediately shrank my tears.

"To the Faithful Garden, sir....!" I said hoarse and so. The driver followed my will. Setia Park is quite far away, can reach 45 minutes distance from Mas Elang house. And I don't think Mas Eagle will know I'm here. Maybe because I need calm, I spontaneity say Faithful Garden as my goal to Mr. Driver.

The trip to the Setia Park which is taken approximately 45 minutes, finally arrived.

"Mom, it's here!" reprimand Mr. Driver surprised me who was daydreaming about my fate in the future.

"Ehhhh, oh yes sir, thank you," I said a little flutter. But I became confused and misbehaved, because when I went out of the house I did not bring anything, My HP was left behind. I was getting confused when the driver turned to me.

"Emmm.., sa-me. ma-mau frankly the same father, I happened to have just left when I forgot to bring nothing, so to pay Taxi, sa-I have no money. Don't worry, I'll pay later when I'm home. I-I asked to write down the father's account number and the amount of Taxi fare. So that I can transfer later," I said a little stammered while bowing my head because I was embarrassed.

"I'm sorry, I don't mean I don't want to pay, but I completely forgot. Now I beg you to write down the account number and the Taxi fare" I pleaded. The driver looks like a head bobble.

"Don't forget the phone number, sir!" weak say. "Mr... I'm sincere, don't have to be paid. Don't think...!" said gently.

"But....!"

"Don't bother Ma'am, I'm really sincere. Especially, I see in trouble. So there's no harm in me helping a little bit. The trick is to lower the cost of this taxi," said Mr. Driver sincerely.

I bowed in shame to receive the kindness of Mr. Driver named Darma according to *nametag* listed on the taxi hanger. With shame, I can only thank you.

"Then I say thank you very much, sir! Let Allah repay you for all your kindness!" I said slowly with clenched hands. The driver smiled sincerely. Without lingering, I got off the taxi from Mr. Darma immediately.

"Sir.. once again I say thank you....!" I said when I got out of the cab. Mr. Darma replied with a sincere smile then slowly re-exposed his taxi. The taxi got further away, accompanied by the sad gaze of both netraku.

"Thank you God, in my trouble you sent an angel of help. May Mr. Darma always be bestowed his provision," my prayer solemnly.

Setia Park on holidays like this is always crowded, during the day there are still many people and then pass to just jogging with their partners. I sat on a bench that was already available there, with a Kersen tree that shaded.

Suddenly this heartache was re-emerging and without feeling tears dripping down. Mas Eagle has really hurt my feelings. Even her harsh words that threatened to kick me out of her house, really hurt my heart.

"It hurts so much, it feels tired to face the attitude of Mas Eagle if like this continues," I said.

The day changes, the day gets darker. Setia Park began to be quiet, the park visitors one by one began to leave the park, but because of the location of the park in the city center, so this park is never empty of visitors even though until night.

Garden lights one by one began to light up, I'm a little worried. It's been almost four hours I've been in this park, lamenting the harsh treatment of Mas Eagle. Sometimes walking is small and moving from one park bench to another, exactly people are confused.

And I'm confused right now, where should I go? Meeting Ms. Marisa feels embarrassed, they are newlyweds, of course, the atmosphere is still in a honeymoon atmosphere. Besides, to go to Marisa's house you need to take a taxi, while I don't hold any money at all. It is impossible for every taxi driver like Mr. Darma to be kind and sincere to help when others are in trouble. Want to go to your house, it's the same as taking a taxi and I don't have money for the fare.

"Sone....!" scream someone surprisingly confused. I was shocked by the sudden presence of my mother-in-law. Why was he here, was it coincidence or intentional?

"Heh... I know from Narti you're leaving the house because the Eagle kicked you out, when are you here?" ketus mom while looking hard at me.

"I know you're happy to see me kicked out like this, so you don't have to bother trying to get rid of me, 'cause I'm out of that house."

"Hehh. If you're honest, I'm glad you're treated like this by an Eagle. But my son and grandson now still need you. She cries for you, so if you still love her, then go home. I don't care about your relationship with my son from now on. So, go home..," said Mother in an urgent tone as she pulled my hand violently intending to take me away.

I suddenly shook off Mom's hand, asked me to come back but the way was still rough, there was no tenderness of a mother asking her son to come home. Mom looked at me wide.

"Sone....!" pekik.

"If you don't want to go home right now, then just look you'll regret it, you'll lose the Eagle and the Shaykh forever!" Threaten Mom to smile cynically. I'm getting bitter about what Mom said just now. Will I lose those two people I still love so much?