"I'm Tired, I Want to Give Up "

Guilt

Only feelings of sadness, disappointment, and regret now felt by Eagle. If only the fight that night did not happen, it was possible that Nada would not go and did not have a miscarriage like this. The pregnancy that Eagle hoped for in order to bring back Nada to his side. But the pregnancy was only present because of her ignorance.

"Tone.pardon my dear. I regretted making you leave that night. I didn't know you were pregnant at the time. I'm really sorry. Forgive your husband this is Nada....!" the soft words came out with her tears.

When the Eagle felt very bad, suddenly from the outside of the door, Mother Sri entered with Marisa. With a sad look, Bu Sri approached the Eagle and rubbed his shoulders.

"El... What's wrong with your wife?" The eagle woke up, his body that had been ducking now looked up when the touch of Bu Sri's hand touched his shoulder.

"Why did Mama come here, to laugh at Nada? Or to ridicule him and spread the events that befell him to Mama's arisan friends? Look, Ma! He left that night because we had a fight because the selfishness of the Eagle brought Nada to Mama's house just to reconcile your tension. But what, Mama was too selfish and already hated the same Tone so we accidentally heard Mama still scorned Nada in front of others behind us. Mama is so outrageous!" said the Eagle rising while standing up and staring intently at Bu Sri.

"How many times has the Eagle given Mama a chance and allowed Mama to be aware of Mama's mistake, but in such a way the Eagle does not make Mama aware as well. Now the Eagle gives up and it's up to Mama, to want to ngetawain Nada or want to scorn Nada in front of Mama's friends, please!" toilet Eagle seems to have resigned with the attitude of Bu Sri who had not liked Nada all this time.

Bu Sri momentarily fell silent in shock, seeing the reaction of such a loud Eagle and unusual. Marisa who was not far from Bu Sri also gasped as well. "Sister Eagle... patient Brother?" Marisa tries to calm down Eagle's anger.

"Sister... What happened to Nada? Why is he in the hospital? And when does Nada come home? Didn't Brother say Nada didn't want to go home yet?" cecar Marisa, even though the Eagle is in a state of panic and anger. The silent eagle ducked with an increasingly sad feeling and again squeezed the fingers of Nada.

The eagle took a deep breath, then looked up. "Last noon suddenly came home and hugged Sya and Brother from behind. But when Brother and Sya turn around, Nada's body slumps and will fall. However Big Brother managed to catch his waist so as not to fall to the floor. Then at that time Brother saw the blood from the thighs of Nada, I thought Nada came the moon and the flood. And at that very moment Nada was unconscious." The eagle told me with a sobbing. The cry that almost no Eagle ever shed all this time.

"So, Tone's pregnant? Doesn't Brother know Nada is pregnant?"

"Sister doesn't know Mar, if you know for sure Brother prevented her from leaving let alone pregnant young." Marisa took a deep breath.

"Patience to Brother. Now I focus first on Nada's healing and Nada's cheerfulness," said Marisa encouraging Eagle.

"Sister is confused, does Brother need to tell his father Nada that Nada is now being treated at the Hospital?"

"You know, brother, when Nada went, Brother had to go to his father's house, Nada, find out. Now that Nada has come home, Brother must give word to his father Nada, "proposed Marisa. The eagle agreed and nodded to Marisa's proposal.

"But... Brother will tell you later Mar after Nada comes home and is healthy."

"Yes, that's up to Brother. How good is Brother."

Ms. Sri, who had been in Nada's nursery since, was only able to watch her children and nieces talking. The sadness suddenly appeared, saddened by the Eagle's changed attitude towards him.

"El. And Mama doesn't want you to be like that" she whispered inwardly. Slowly Bu Sri walked out of the room and left the room without saying goodbye. While Elang and Marisa were still talking, Bu Sri had unknowingly left the room.

An hour after Nada was transferred to the ward, Nada's fingers moved, which the Eagle immediately felt. Since then the Eagle did not release the hand of Tone for a second.

"Sone....!" hissing Eagle.

"Why Brother?" Marisa who was still there was surprised and curious.

"Sone....!" call the Soft Eagle.

"Where is this....?" The voice of the tone was weak and slow.

"Darling you are now in the hospital" replied the Eagle.

"Siris Ma-risa....!" sapa Nada was weak as she looked at Marisa beside the Eagle.

"Yes, Nad... ! Do not move much first, you are still weak and still under the influence of anesthesia," said Marisa.

"What happened to Nada, Ma'am?" tanya Nada was curious.

"You.. miscarried Honey....!" replied the Eagle ventured.

"A-pa? A miscarriage? So then... Pregnant tones?" tanya Tada with breath down and faltered.

The eagle squeezed the fingers of Nada who seemed to want to rebel, trying to calm down.

"So... Pregnancy and abortion?" her tan was again accompanied by sobs and her crying was now broken. This shows that Nada did not know she was pregnant at the time. The eagle nodded slowly while rubbing the forehead of the sweaty Tone. Seeing that Marisa could not hold back tears, she was very sad about the situation experienced by Nada.

"Why should this happen to Nada?" a soft question came out of the mouth of Nada which neither Eagle nor Marisa could answer. And that cry now filled the entire VIP ward. Tones of roaring and banging the hands of the Eagle spontaneously. Occasionally his fingers touched his queen's stomach with a deep sense of regret.

"I'm sorry, Mom, son. Mother is late to realize your presence in the womb of Mother. Mother was very foolish," her screams in a heart full of regret.

"It's all Mother's fault. Mother does not quickly realize you!" Nada still blames herself as she roars .

The eagle lowered his body and grabbed Nada's body while giving the winning strokes.

"Honey.patience yes.later God will definitely give us trust again. It's fate, so don't be sad anymore. Please please!" The eagle gives a motivational speech near the ears of Nada. But Nada still did not stop crying.

"Sister.let Nada cry first, let all her tatters come out through her cries. Later also Nada will plong after satisfied crying," said Marisa calming Eagle.

The eagle raised its body and rose. The tightness in his chest increased to see Nada still crying bitterly and feeling regretful. He also felt very guilty, because when the quarrel Nada left, and it turns out that Nada was pregnant. The eagle now feels guilty and feels himself to be a useless husband.

"*All this is inseparable from my attitude, which**never understood Nada*'s feelings*." The eagle again admits in his heart that all that befalls Nada is the result of his selfishness that is unable to understand and feel the feelings of Nada.

"Sir.. happened to be this late afternoon, Marisa had to go home first. Soon Mas Ilham came home, Marisa said yes. Nada, I'm saying yes!" Marisa approached Nada while gently rubbing Nada's hand for a farewell. Tone stared weakly and blinked his eyes in response to Marisa's pamit.

"Repidly healed and quickly go home. After that you can ask for more dough with Brother Eagle." In such a state Marisa still slipped the words guyonan, but Nada still lay weak. The eagle glared, understanding the meaning of Marisa's cousin who sometimes coslet and bring it.

"Thank you Miss Risa....!" reply Nada looked at the weak Marisa who was now starting to disappear behind the VIP nursery door.