It's Not You I Want

zidan's remorse

ZIDAN POV'S

I love him so much, I love him, I am sincere with him, no matter how much he makes me disappointed in his attitude, so much so I will forgive his mistakes, I want him to change, I want him to change, I want to make her the only woman in my life.

The thing I regret the most is making her tears fall for my attitude towards her, I never had any intention of hurting her, I just wanted to make her realize how sorry I am to her, she said, even though I know how to go wrong

I almost dropped the talaq on him once but he quickly broke down crying under my feet, I could feel his tears falling down the backs of my feet, and my heart was shaking, I could feel his sincerity in me, maybe he was just a khilaf and I went back to forgiving him, but from that moment on I started to change, I often made Him cry.

the day I threw the cup of coffee he made for me, I don't know what made me so angry at him, when he just put his coffee cup on my desk, but I did , it made her cry about my rude behavior.

I saw her endure the pain of the scratches of the shard that hurt her beautiful fingers, I wanted to help her then, but again my ego was more powerful in my heart.

there was never a word of surrender in the woman's life, she always tried to be kind to me even though my attitude towards her was too much

his smile never once faded from his beautiful face, every day he waited for me to come home with that smile, but it was precisely the hatred I showed him, he said, it's hard to see the woman I love falling over because of my rude attitude.

I try to make her happy by following her simple request, I invite her to spend time together like we used to do

I linked my fingers with her cold fingers, seeing her smile happily just because enjoying Korean food was enough to warm my heart

But again I made her cry, with how could I leave her alone and let her go home alone.

anxiously waiting for his return that night, he entered with his pale face, not lying, I was worried to see him, I guess he gave up because even though he did not want to look me in the face, he did not want to, but in the morning the beautiful smile returned the woman showed me, sometimes I think what this woman I married was not sane, why she always smiled when her heart was hurt.

but I realized it wasn't stupidity, but his genuine love for me the jerk.

just like him I was so happy to hear the news if soon we will be parents.

I didn't want to hurt her, as long as she was pregnant with my child, I changed, I tried to get back to her gently, I was sincere about my attitude, I felt I punished her enough, I punished her, I also believe my wife has changed now, I don't want to make her cry anymore, but maybe it's her who can't believe my sincerity, because so much suffering I've given her.

my wife thought I would come back rough with her after she gave birth to our child, in fact no, I don't want to hurt her more deeply anymore .

my biggest regret is hurting her feelings, even though I myself made her believe that I would be able to make her continue to be happy when asking her to accept my proposal.

...

AUTHOR POV

ZASKIAAAA "hunting breath, heart rhythm that is not ruffled, sweat that poured out as big as corn soaked the man's face, the man, zidan was still digesting what he had just experienced, the woman who had just given birth to her child until she was shocked to hear the cry of zidan

"mas...mas why?" Zidan ignored, though,

He reached for a cell phone to contact Zaskia, but there was no answer from there, his heart was increasingly rumbling, he could usually fall asleep when Zaskia saw him walking alone with alesha

rushing he drove a car, splitting the streets of Bandung which is still crowded with other road users, horns and shouts no longer care, which he wants now to go home to see his wife, he said, making sure it was all just a dream.

the door of the house he opened hard, his eyes skimming through every room that was there, there was no Zaskia waiting for him as usual, Zaskia usually already sat in the living room waiting for his arrival with a fluffy smile, but now where is Zaskia

"ZASKIA"

"ZASKIA"

"ZASKIAAAA WHERE ARE YOU"

"KIYAAAAAA, ZASKIA" the man did not find his wife, he reached for a mobile phone to contact Zaskia, repeatedly trying to contact her but repeatedly calling her at the operator's answer.

"kiyaaa" so softly called the man, he did not find his wife anywhere, his fear of the dream was back in his head, Zaskia left him for good, Zaskia suffers from a deadly disease, Zidan hopes it is all just a flower of sleep, he is sure Zaskia will be home soon, maybe the woman is going to calm down.

Zidan waited anxiously for his wife's return, but the clock showed that at 10pm Zaskia did not return home,

"arggghh, Where are you Kiii, go home, I'm worried" zidan repeatedly called his wife's phone but again only the operator he heard, zidan threw the flat object.

"you go where the hell Kii, don't scare me" zidan just remembered one place that the woman used to visit at a time like this, yes.

Zidan rushes to the beach hoping his wife is there, the cold wind of the night is no longer ignored, his appearance is random, zidan runs towards a place he used to visit with Zaskia first

but the nihil woman was also not there, zidan rubbed his face of frustration, where else he had to look for the whereabouts of the wife, his wife was a woman of kara, there was no place for her to go home

"Zaskia where you, come home baby, anywayang, I mohooon" tears can no longer be weathered, the man cried down in frustration

long enough zidan on the beach, with slow steps, zidan walked back to his car, hit the steering wheel repeatedly, he did not know where else to look the wife.

zidan wishes Zaskia was home, sleeping on a warm blanket or waiting for her return, but none of Zaskia pointed at her nose

"sorry me Ki, I can explain everything, what you saw earlier is not like what you imagined kii" zidan covered his face with a palm

Zidan intended to call his mother, hoping that Zaskia would return there, although it was unlikely, but the first time he saw the flattened object was, 10 missed calls from his wife, zidan did leave his phone in the living room.soon he contacted his wife, but back, only the operator answered his call

"lift Kii please lift"

Zidan saw an incoming message that Zaskia sent half an hour ago, a voice message to be more precise.