It's Not You I Want

Zahra Aulia

As planned, today Zila is going to the obstetrician with Daffa , this is also the first time she went with Daffa. both of them were enjoying breakfast before going to the obstetrician's clinic.

Today it was not Zila who cooked, but Daffa, the man made the fried rice that he often made for his mother, and the second person zila he made fried rice that his mother thought was the most delicious in the world

"Well, good"

"emm, good"

"lumayan?, mamah Even called it the most delicious in the world" Daffa moved his lips, looking anxious even zila smiled at his adorable behavior

"em__ ok, your fried rice is delicious"

"Yahh, not sincere "

"daffa's cooking is the most delicious" zila held daffa's hand, trying to tell daffa if what he said was sincere

"try saying it again"

"yes your cooking is delicious, the most delicious in the world after my mother of course"

"but it doesn't seem like it, just called what tried"

"emm, what's up"

"mas__mas Daffa" Daffa said with emphasis

"sorry" zila's face turned sad

"heey, why"

"sorry, have called there by the name of mas, you do not like it if I call you mas.

Like a rock on her chest, the tightness she felt on her chest, Zila's apology was like a sword that drew her heart, sick, very sick.

the flashback

"Mas, what time is it today" Zila placed a warm tea glass on the table where Daffa worked. even though zila tau made tea will just end up at the dining table without touching Daffa

"Mas"

"Mas, we go to Bandung yuk, zila kangen mother"

"gold!!"

"STOP CALLING ME MAS, I'M SICK OF HEARING HER, STOPIII, I HATE THAT CALL"

zila only bit her lower lip, but did not shed a single tear, but her heart ached, even Daffa hated the call of the mas zila said to her, such a trivial thing could make Daffa so angry.

"zila just wanted to nanya mas" the zila voice trembled withstanding the cry

Daffa threw a glass with a plate that zila brought for him to the floor, even the zila who stood not far from it was hit by his flush, fortunately zila used warm water instead of hot water.

"I SAID STOP CALLING ME MAS, I NEVER GAVE YOU THE SLIGHTEST RIGHT TO USE IT"

"sorry"

zila passed away leaving Daffa with her emotions, in room , zila curled up on her bed, crying without a voice, the tightness in her chest was so miserable, with his insistence Daffa yelled at him just because of the name of the mas that he threw every day for him.

"i promise you, I won't call you a mas, with that name again, sorry" Zila monologue

the flashback

For some reason the memory appeared again, as well as the pain, zila covered her face with both hands, her back up and down holding a sob, the tightness of Daffa's rejection just because he called her mas at that time reminded her of all the pain Daffa gave her.

Daffa stood up from his chair, approaching the sobbing wife in his place. On the deck of the little body of zila in his arms, on the stroke of his gentle wife's arm.

"Stupid, sorry Zil, sorry"

zila grew sobbing to hear Daffa's speech The sentence opened the old wound that he planted is now open again with the same wound.

"i hate you, hate you, you're mean, rude, grumpy, I'm scared"

Zila hit Daffa's arm, the pain she had been feeling was not worth the little punch she had given to Daffa's arm, she tried to escape Daffa's embrace, but Daffa further tightened his embrace.

...

In the car, the zila was silent as usual, Daffa wiped the remaining tears at the end of the zila's eyes, there was no response from the woman, his gaze remained straight facing forward. Daffa also did not force the zila to speak, Daffa allowed the zila to calm his feelings first.

Arriving at the clinic that zila showed, zila walked first in the Daffa behind, Zila slowed her way down, so that Daffa who was behind was now right beside her, right next to her, without even looking at Daffa's face, Zila fused her fingers with daffa fingers,

"Come on"Take zila

"i already signed up last night"

"ko can"

"i can be friends with the owner of the clinic"

"oh yeah"

"emm"

Zila and Daffa Just waited about 10 minutes until finally the name of the zila was called.

both of them entered the examination room.

"Assynogaic"

"waalaikumsallam, enter Zil"

"yes" mbak"

Daffa eyes perfectly patterned see a doctor who often met his wife, you may have guessed who she was, yes__ Zahra Aulia, the beautiful woman who made Daffa fall in love with her,

Zahra Aulia has now successfully become an obstetrician and opened her own clinic.

"Who is Zil"

"husband mbak, the time of infidelity" the two chuckled, they had indeed known each other , since zila checked her content at the Zahra clinic, Bede story with Daffa, Daffa, the man seemed to be standing on two sides, his one future his one past, I don't know what kind of future and past Daffa meant.

"Daffa" rebuked Zahra after realizing that she was the figure of the husband of Zila, both clenched their hands to greet each other without any physical touch.

The two stared at each other for a moment, there was a different beat in their hearts, but then both of them were aware of the sin they had just committed, zila could only watch the two from the bed.

"Where's Ma'am, zila baby"

"Alhamdulillah the baby is healthy, he grew well in there, but remember the message mbak not many thoughts your poor zil, you can drop again rich one month ago"

"yes" mbak"

"our baby is a girl or a boy doc" asked Daffa, after helping the zila tidy up her clothes

"woman"

"this is the medicine you can redeem in the pharmacy"

"thank you mbak"

"yes, same, go straight home"

"yes, Zila is tired of taking a break, assalamualaikum"

"navaloupe"

Zahra stared fixedly at the backs of the husband and wife who she knew very well their siyapa.

a look that is hard to understand.

...

"Think what daf, mbak Zahra"

"ah, not "

"i understand, relax"

"You know each other"

"yes"

"since when"

"since becoming pregnant, Zahra has been a very good person, in addition to being insightful, Zahra has also been kind, worthy of time in school many like"

Daffa only listened to zila without wanting to participate in the story of Zahra in the story of his own wife.

"Sometimes one day I can't take care of our baby, I want Zahra to take care of him"

"you said what the hell, don't talk about anything unimportant" Daffa slightly snapped Hearing the zila's remark, even Zila could see Daffa's expression change from confusion to anger, anger, zila did not answer it spontaneously came out of her mouth, zila just rubbed her stomach while looking at the daffa face from the side.

.......