Sharing Love: My Husband Married Without My Permission

52. Ayu Decree

"Dye. I'm sorry, Yu. I'm sorry!" she cried while hugging me. I tried to get away from him, but his embrace was so tight that I could not let go.

"I'm sorry, because I've done something rude to you, Yu. I'm sorry. Last night I was not aware of what I was doing" said Mas Hilman sobbing. Really why did Mas Hilman not feel embarrassed by the Mother who saw us?

Mother stood up from her seat. "Mom will rest for a while, you guys talk first" said Mother and left in front of us.

After Mom's departure, I pushed rough Mas Hilman's body and took two steps back from him. Last night I can still remember clearly. How much he doesn't care about my feelings.

"What are you doing here, Mom?" I asked him by looking at him sharply.

"I want to apologize for my treatment last night with you, I'm really sorry, Yu." The look in his eyes was softer than his last night. However, I will not melt just because of that gentle look at me.

I shook my head. "Sorry how, my friend? You've obviously hurt me born and inner," I replied in a slow tone. In this house there are still two other people, there is no way I should shout to be angry with him.

"Then from that I'm sorry, Yu. I was completely out of control last night. I didn't realize that I had hurt you" he said.

Mas Hilman came back forward, but I also rewinded my footsteps.

"Are you really not going to forgive me?"

Again, I shook my head.

His shoulders look down hearing me talk like that. He looked very lethargic and disappointed as well.

"Have my actions gone too far for you last night?" ask Mas Hilman again.

I want to laugh when I hear him talk to me like that. Does he think that his rude actions last night were just that he was playing games? Too!

"Why did you ask again? You have caught up with me here, haven't you thought with your actions?" ask her. Mas Hilman now just lowered his head, no longer daring to look at me.

"I'm being emotional, Yu. Sorry, I wasn't who I was last night."

"You have lost yourself for a long time! Don't you realize you've been a stranger to me for a long time?" ask me with a sharp look towards him.

"Yes, that's why I'm sorry. I'm so sorry about you. I love you, Yu. Do you want to forgive me? We can live life as before." said Mas Hilman again now he is also the same looking into the depths of my eyes with full hope.

I'm now silent for a moment. Steady myself with what I am going to say right now to him. Highlight eyes full of haru and also full of longing. If only the eyes could speak, would he say honesty? Or lies?

"So you're sorry?" asked Mas Hilman in a happy-sounding tone of voice. I nodded my head.

"I'm sorry, Mom. But sorry. Our relationship won't be the same as it used to be" I said to him.

Now Mas Hilman was stunned in disbelief.

"So, you stick to your thoughts of separating from me?" ask Mas Hilman. Now he shakes my shoulder quite hard. Slightly sick there due to his fairly strong grip.

"You want to split up with me?!" she screamed loudly in front of my face. I turned my face the other way, avoiding him who now looked angry.

"Dad, don't shut up! You don't really want to split up with me, do you?" ask Mas Hilman. His face now began to blush with a sharpened roar. I violently threw the big hand off my shoulder.

"Sorry, Mom . That was my decision. I don't want to be with you anymore" I told him. There was no more feeling I should be afraid of this time. Mom knew everything and she gave me the freedom to choose. Can I now pursue my own happiness? Although later, whether I will get a soul mate back or not because of my shortcomings, but I do not care. At least I've felt loved by someone.

"You haven't thought about it well, Yu."

"good. I'll give you a few more days to think. You're just being emotional!" mas Hilman said. He then stepped away from me, without having a chance to speak again. Before long there was the sound of the roar of his car and then from where I was standing, I could see if the car was now leaving the house.

I sat on the couch with my knees down. Mas Hilman wouldn't listen to me either. I'm not fooling around saying that, but why does he always say I need time? It's been enough for me these almost four months to think about what I'm going to do with our relationship.

No. gabe. I won't back down from what I want!

"Juice!" exclaim Mother. I turned my head to hear Mom calling me. Soon Mother approached and took me in her arms.

"Is Ayu wrong to ask to be separated from her, Mom? Why would he never listen to Ayu? Mas Hilman always thought that Ayu needed time to think." I complained to Mom. This time there were no more tears coming out of my eyes just that the tone of my voice was slightly choked due to the tightness that was still shackling.

"Are you sure you want to part with him?" ask Mother. I'm nodding.

"Aren't you in love with Hilman anymore?" Mother asked once again. I was silent now, neither nodding nor assuring. Indeed, if you think, it is difficult to forget someone who is very dear to us, especially during the seven years of marriage and the time we have lived before the marriage. Not a little time.

Not love? Nope. I was trying to erase the love that was in my heart for him. Now Mas Hilman belongs to Hana and also her son. If I continue to be with them, other than me who will continue to be hurt by the victim's feelings, won't I also interfere with the good relationship between the two?

"I'll try to accept this farewell, Mom. I don't want to make Mas Hilman leave a woman who has given him a son, only for me who can't necessarily give him a son."