Sharing Love: My Husband Married Without My Permission

51. Honest to Mom

Mom took me to sit on the couch. He helped me put down the bag I was still carrying on my back. With a sad and sad look, and with a gentle hand on the back of my hand, Mother then sighed in a tired voice.

"What's up, Yu? You don't usually come home these nights? Something must be bad, right?" ask Mom slowly.

I just nodded, still unable to say anything. I thought if I was wrong to come home. I should have just held on there. What was I thinking about? You should not be made to think hard.

"Yu, what's wrong? Are you guys on a rampage?" ask my mother again.

I still chose to shut up and shake my head.

"Yes! Don't duck, look at Mom, son!" mother exclaimed while slightly pulling my hand, making my bowed head now look into her dear eyes.

"Don't lie to Mom again. What's going on?" ask Mom firmly.

I can no longer hold back my feelings. I turned my eyes away from Mom's gaze, but these tears I couldn't stand. I want to be strong in front of Mom, but why can't I?

With her thin hands, Mom took me into a hug, making me sob on her shoulder even more. The hand warmly stroked my back gently, bringing comfort and tranquility, but that was precisely what made my sobs into a great cry.

I don't know how long I've been crying on Mom's shoulder. Mom didn't talk at all, letting me spill all this grief through tears.

"Have you?" ask Mom after my crying has subsided. I nodded as I wiped the rest of my tears, if I thought I was like a child right now. Where was Ayu who had been strong all this time? Where was Ayu who had been painstakingly holding back her cries?

"The same story, honest mother." Pinta Mom with a sharp look at me. Ah, Mom seems to know that I've been lying a lot lately.

"I'm sorry Ayu, Mom. Sorry," I said.

"Why?" ask Mom again.

"Mom, would I be angry if Ayu split up with Mas Hilman?" ask directly. Mom looked surprised by what I said just now, but a second later Mom's face looked ordinary again.

"You're a big boy, Yu. No matter what decision you make, you are an adult. You can tell which is good which is not. I believe you speak like this because you feel Hilman is no good" replied Mother in a firm tone. There was no anger in his tone.

I can't believe I can hear an answer like this. I guess Mom will be angry and also disagree I separated from Mas Hilman.

"Mom not angry?" I still cry while sobbing.

I just shook my head.

"Mom knows you, Yu. You wouldn't make a decision like this if Hilman was good with you. Why didn't you tell Mom you had a problem? Is your problem hard until you split up with Hilman?" ask Mom sadly.

I again sobbed, remembering what happened all this time, also remembering how Mas Hilman treated me earlier.

"The water is not strong, Mom. Mas Hilman has remarried to another woman, Ayu is not strong with the treatment of Mas Hilman and his wife, Ms ...." I came back crying.

"Astaghfirullah, why didn't you say the same to Mom? Why did you let her marry again?" mother asked while hugging me. There was a mother's chest that rumbled, instantly a sense of worry whack in my heart. Afraid that your heart might recur.

"Fear up, Mom. Ayu is afraid that Mom will be shocked. Ayu does not want to lose Mom," I said with a sob. Mother tightened her embrace towards me, her hand still gently stroking my back.

"God willing, Mother will be strong, son," said Mother with a voice that sounded trembling.

***

This morning I woke up with my eyes. Slightly swollen from crying all night in Mom's arms.

Last night I heard my story, and I cried after that. Actually I was afraid of the after effects, but it turns out that Mother is a strong woman at her age who is no longer young and among the diseases that exist in her.

'Do what makes you happy, Yu. Do not accept your own heart. I'll support you, ' said Mother last night.

To get rid of my sadness and anger, I do house cleaning activities. All the curtains installed in this house I take off and I soak in a big tub. Washing machines do exist, but I want to distract myself by busying myself with work. Mom wanted to help, but I forbade and told Mom to just cook in the kitchen together with Sinta. Cooking is lighter for Mom than helping me wash.

"Bak Ayu!" exclaim Sinta who is now on the doorstep of the bathroom.

"Yes?" I who was sitting on the plastic bench turned to him.

"That's .. anu ...." Sinta's face looked a little strange, her speech was stammering.

"What?" ask again.

"There's Mas Hilman up front, Ma'am. I want to meet Ms Ayu," he said again.

"Sorry, Ma'am. I couldn't do anything, the door was open because I was sweeping the house" he said with a bad feeling.

I smiled at Sinta and stopped the pace of my hand rubbing the cloth in hand. Maybe I know why Sinta feels bad. Looks like he thinks I'm avoiding Mas Hilman.

"No pa-pa, Sin. If he is already home, how else. Yeah, already. Ma'am wants to go inside. Have you made a drink?" I asked Sinta.

"Already, Ma'am. Mas Hilman is also talking to Budhe," he said again.

I stood up and cleaned my hands of soapy foam.

Sinta continues my work. He was indeed very diligent, without me asking him to be alert with homework, while I went into the house to meet Mas Hilman and also Mother.

Mas Hilman immediately stood up after looking at me, without being ashamed of Mom, he hugged me.

"Dye. I'm sorry, Yu. I'm sorry!" he cried while crying.