Home For My Soul

102|It's Me

“Are you sure this is the right time?” asked Nolan with a worried face.

“We want to wait until when?” said Brother Jericho. “What six years is not enough for Mama to cry for her daughter who never died?”

“Can you guys stop fighting?” my hers. “I'm nervous. You're not reducing my panic, you're adding to it.”

Mama's health has dropped dramatically over the past year so I pulled out to be honest with her. The doctors checked her condition, but they couldn't find what was causing her pain.

So, we're desperate to tell the truth now. I don't want Mama to leave before I know that my soul is still in this world, only my body is rotting in the ground. One other thing that forces me to talk now, I'll go far.

I also can't bear to let Mama keep crying over me. It was better for him to fall ill again in shock than for his health to continue declining due to prolonged suffering. Both are just as bad for my mom.

The door is knocked, then opened. Me and my two brothers stood up from our seats. Mama first came in, then Papa. They smiled at Brother Nolan, then were both surprised when they saw me.

“What is this, Nolan?” ask Mama with a sigh. “Why did you bring this killer here?”

“When I passed SD, we admitted to going to Bali. But Papa and Brother don't know we're traveling to Paris for two weeks. We were only in Bali for one day to make false documentation,” I said, mentioning one of our many secrets.

Brother Nolan and Brother Jericho turned their heads towards me. “You went to Paris without us!?”

“Mama once suspected Papa of cheating, so we stalked Papa once while preparing to open our hotel branch in Parapat. Turns out Papa doesn't have another woman.”

“Kat-catelia?” my mother said she did not believe. “Two things I never told anyone.”

“I also never said it to anyone, Ma,”.

He took a surprised breath while covering his mouth with both hands. His eyes were teary, holding back tears. The paramedics we called were getting ready in case Mama lost consciousness. But he surprised us by standing up.

“A-what happened? Why are you in this body? Your way of speaking is also very similar to him.” My eyes are staring at me from head to toe. “You are now different once.”

“Sit, yuk, Ma. I'll tell you everything from the beginning,” take me.

Papa and Mama were still shaken according to. They come in and sit where they are available. Brother Nolan pushed for me to sit next to Mama, so I obeyed him. The woman just silently looked at me and did not extend her hand to touch me.

I waited until everyone, except my family, came out of the room. Then every detail that happened that day, I conveyed without a single thing I hid anymore. My mom and dad were quiet when I finished talking.

I looked at Brother. They just nodded slowly, asking me to be patient. I saw our parents who were silent. Papa blinked his eyes, then looked at me intently. My mother first touched my hand.

“Oh, God,” murmured Mama slowly. “I've hit you so many times, Kat. I-I've also been wickedly yelling at you every time we meet. I'm not surprised you've waited all this time to talk to me. I should have known this earlier than my other two children.”

“I still can't believe this,” Papa said.

“I also still can't believe, Pa,” I'm Brother Nolan.

The waiter came to serve the food we had ordered. We also eat well. The anxiety that had been controlling us completely drained the rest of the energy we had. Brother Nolan and Brother Jericho occasionally fight over pieces of food that live one.

Shame to see the behavior of my two brothers, then I ordered one more serving. Papa and Mama were silent, but their hands and mouth did not stop moving. I feel bad for making them shaken.

“So, Ma, Pa,” says Brother Jericho. “During this time, Amarylis stayed with her family in Medan. Then he went to college for three and a half years in Depok. Papa and Mama will not believe, he managed to graduate with summa cum laude, even got a special event from the rector.”

“I still can't believe he can be smarter than me. I failed to reach summa cum laude.” Brother Nolan pouted.

I looked towards him. “Bed. Sister studies while working, so her focus is divided,” entertain me. He smiled happily.

“You also work. You make no difference,” refute Brother Jericho.

“What's wrong with you? You don't like to hear him praise me?” nagel Kak Nolan.

“Well, there is other good news,” said Brother Jericho, ignoring the protest Brother. “Amarilis gets scholarship to continue study. He will leave for America in May.”

“What?” My mother finally responded. “Secap it?”

“Where do you want to just finish undergraduate already advanced college again?” papa Timpal. “Isn't it better to work a few years new take master's degree?”

“Ng, that, I already have my own plans, Pa,” I replied.

They nodded slowly, then went back to eating their food in silence. My brother and I exchanged looks. It seems like they still need time to be able to receive the shocking news that we are conveying.

After dinner, Brother Nolan went home with our parents, while Brother Jericho drove me home. We were full, so we were more silent. After all, we've been talking every day to plan the meeting today. Unfortunately, everything went beyond expectations.

“I have to return to Jakarta tomorrow. Take care of yourself.” He rubbed my head.

“Iya, Brother. We'll see you next month. I'm leaving through Jakarta. So, set aside Brother time for one day for me.”

“Beres.”

I hugged her body before getting out of the car. He waited until I got in, then left. The atmosphere of the house was already quiet, so I cleaned myself in the bathroom and climbed the stairs carefully. I'll miss this house later.

After changing clothes, I sat down on the edge of the bed. It must have been hard for Papa and Mama to accept the fact that in this body there is my soul. I also sometimes forget that I'm not Katelia. So I can understand their reaction.

My eyes glanced at the large suitcase in the corner of my room. My mother's gift of graduation was accepted at my target campus abroad. Somehow they found out I needed a scholarship, but they offered to pay for my college in full. Most heartwarming, they told me there was a donor willing to bear the cost of my life for two years.

What Mama said is true. God only wants to test as hard as I try to achieve my dreams. I didn't win a scholarship from the government, but the campus gave me a way out. I don't even have to ask through proposals. Worried about having to go to college while working, there are donors who want to help other costs.

I was one step closer to my plan. What about Theo? Is he okay abroad? I don't know where he went to college, nor did he take a year or two. One thing is for sure, the social media profile picture is still the same. Honey, can I hope you still like me?