SOULMATES

Alka's birthday plan

After I observed A Rangga from the beginning until now It is true that his behavior was good at the beginning but disappointing at the end.

I remember his words.

"oh yeah, I'm so sorry. Sorry if every time you send a message I rarely bales or even not in reply at all. It's nothing, you're afraid you don't think I like it or I'm angry, right.

Maybe because of the circumstances, he means because of the usual circumstances themselves, who never chat or anything else.

Too long to enjoy yourself, so the thing that is now done feels strange sorry. I hope you understand. "

At that time I thought a Rangga was indeed a good man, who just focused on work without thinking about women.

I also heard A Rangga again so bayawak now mencla mencle here and there, Crocodile.

I ignored the words of Judah at that time, still think that a Rangga was a good person.

A Rangga himself told Mang Dedi when Zara was shopping.

"Mang, good people yes mang. Good guy. " With his arrogant behavior. Perhaps a Rangga felt the upper hand because many women were chasing him at that time, especially Zara.

Mang Dedi just smiled at that time.

I see there are two different sides in a Rangga. His words and actions were much different. This guy is good at pretending. I don't know. Maybe there's something in him that makes him that way.

Maybe there was an old wound that had not healed in him, so he did just that. Looks strong outside even though his heart is very fragile like a crab. But he did not want to show his weak side in front of everyone so Rangga acted hard on himself. May you be healed. Don't keep pretending. Be happy with you. Be what you are, heal your wounds first. So that you can find your true happiness A Rangga.

Maybe Arjuna will not always shine, there will come a time when the light will dim, as the age increases.

A Rangga, I waited for you for a long time, I mentioned your name many times in the do'a, I take good care of my heart, Where I keep the feelings that God grows. Everything I've done since I fell in love with you back then.

We exchanged messages and talked about my journey. I admired you, even though you never cared.

We are both silent in the end, silence that actually presents a farewell. He said that if the matchmakers can not remind each other in any case, in fact you choose to stay away from me.

A Rangga, you have found someone else who first makes you sure, first makes you believe that he is the one God sent for you. Whether it's the Roses or something, I don't know.

I have waited too long for your presence, I am waiting for you to at least say what is in your heart directly to me, or just visit my sick mother. Until now there was nothing good you did for me. To see me, it might never happen. Just a word, which means nothing.

Zara believes the best Love is to take care of, keep your feelings for me intact until the time comes, Everything ends up just being a story without real reality.

O Allah If indeed Rangga and Zara are just two that do not end up being one. Then help you to present to two quite limited feelings and do not be hope. Because everything never came true.

I forgot how to love you. It's okay, God has answered all the questions that have existed, about the puzzle that has not been solved, about how Rangga really is.

Maybe now my time is up to wait for you, but Rangga never came to Zara. Until in the end God and the universe forced me to step back slowly to get away from your life A Rangga. God made Zara realize that Rangga was not worth waiting for and I fought for it in the end.

Hopefully from there Zara finds something that matures me. God did meet Zara with the wrong person first, before finally being reunited with the true Love that God has prepared for me.

Like I said to A Rangga.

"Western if I visit, for now I want to wait on the porch of the house just. will not force entry, embarrassed. If told to go home yes I will go home. would not dare to just knock on the door. I was wrong, forced to enter without permission. Not polite, yes. Sorry yeah. "

And now I have found the answer.

"Enough, don't send whats app here again. "

As if you were going to tell me to go home to where I came from, where I didn't know you first A Rangga.

Thank you very much Rangga for the life lessons that you have given me, until finally I was able to heal my own wounds.

I will go and will really go, because maybe going is one of the best ways when struggle and sacrifice are just considered a joke.

In life, at least once, we will meet someone we love as hard as our heart. But he will never be able to have us even if only for a moment, will never be able to hold us even for a second, we will never be able to touch even at the end. We can only pray and be finished.

A Rangga goodbye, this speech is not an easy thing for me. Because there is a battle of Heart and logic. When Logic wants to go far let go but the heart always holds back from staying.

But I can't stand it anymore. Maybe I will not be able to hate you because my love is greater than my hatred for you Rangga.

I also found the words of Ittakrn author of the Eccedentesiast Novel.

"Writing stories is the best revenge. And making people who have bullied me suffer in my writing includes simple, but quite satisfying, inner satisfaction.

Looking from there I can also reveal how A Rangga really is, and I feel relieved now even though in the end Rangga and Zara can not be together. At least Zara knows what Rangga's nature and character are like. Until I have the power to say goodbye to Rangga.

I'm out of your life now, may I be happy. See you, stubborn and hard-hearted. May you be happy and find the life partner you want to be a Rangga.