IF YOU ARE A FOOL
Your pain, my happiness
Rahardian POV
It felt like my heart had collapsed upon hearing the cry of someone who called out to Kayra's mother in a panicked voice.
Really, this foot wants to step there immediately it feels. But I haven't had time to think long, more hysterical screams were heard again. Kayra fainted? though as far as I know he never had a history of worrying diseases.
What happened to Kayra?
As soon as the car came back out of the gate, I immediately contacted Melan. Maybe he knows something. And it turns out I didn't get any answers. Even Melan herself only found out when I called her.
The next day Melan told me about Kayra's condition. There was sadness, pity was also angry at myself. If only I could take care of him, like when I was a kid?
Instantly I can feel, where he is often blamed for the mistakes of others. Including because I'm alone. Maybe it's appropriate that he doesn't want to know me anymore.
Maybe I was selfish, unable to accept her unilateral decision.
Even I'm so eager to see him right now. Even if he doesn't want to see me anymore, let me keep looking at him.
At first Melan did not allow me to go to the hospital with her other school friends. With reason, fear makes things worse. But since I kept asking and promising to only see Kayra from the outside, I was finally allowed to come along. With pretty strict conditions.
First, I can't leave the house. Second, I can't take anyone. Third, I can't come in. Fourth, I cannot speak. And fifth, I can not PDKT with his other friends.
Indeed today I have a need on campus, even though KBM has not been running. So I left the campus.
All the conditions I have followed, but unfortunately there is someone who invites me to talk. There's no way I'm ignoring. I just spoke quietly and briefly as possible.
Then Melan came out and asked me to go into the ward.
What's wrong with me? if Melan wants to get angry I shouldn't be in front of Kayra either.
Finally I walked doubtfully following Melan.
"Talk to Kayra"
Melan pulled me to keep walking closer to the bed.
As our distance neared, Melan and her friends left us.
My heart was beating unbecoming. Because what happened was beyond suspicion.
Even though I wanted to get close to this girl, it turned out that my heart was not that loud when I was really near her.
For a moment we were silent.
But I'm a man and don't I so want to fix the distance between us?!
"you're healthy"
I started the conversation with a standard question.
"alhamdulillah. Thanks for taking the time to visit"
lucky he's not as cold as I thought.
"i'm sorry, yes, for all my faults"
maybe I've talked about this, but this time I wish there was a better end.
"I'm sorry"
he said as he looked towards the balcony.
"It's not just sorry I expected. But also your great heart to get to know me well.
I know the situation between us isn't as good as it used to be.
Give me time, enough YOU and ME to come back well, give me a way to fix everything.
I know maybe it's not easy for you, at least give me a chance to improve myself, as well as the situation.
Because I'm not easy to accept, you don't want to know me anymore.
I beg you, if I have to kneel I will.
Kayra, to me you're still my old little girl. I don't know how big of a mistake I made. How much hatred I unintentionally incite in your heart. It's all just my way, which I think is right, that makes me happy.
Stupid me who never thought from your side.
I'm sorry, I'm so stupid"
Kayra was still looking towards the balcony. Not a single look at me since I entered the room.
But that's okay, at least he's heard my words. I can only pray in my heart, may Allah soften his heart.
I'm happy enough to be given the chance to be here right now.
Seeing that he could already sit up straight, joking with his friends and most importantly, he wanted to talk to me.
