IF YOU ARE A FOOL

Not Endless

One month passed, two months passed, three months passed and after the time of KKN Dian in the village where my boarding school is located.

Ever since I learned to get away from other people's problems, yeah, I feel happier, in harmony with Dian. Whether what status deserves to be pinned on our relationship, we certainly support each other trying to unite the same sense.

This is Dian's last semester. After returning home from KKN he will begin to compose the script.

So much he wanted to immediately justify me, he had submitted job applications to several companies and factories.

Even in Dian's mind there are plans to leave the house if only his ummi is still against our relationship.

"hopefully, I don't need a guardian for marriage either" she said.

But still, I didn't want him to be an unfilial child. Either way, the blessing of both parents is an absolute thing for me.

Agh, I was thinking about my wedding.

I haven't been home for a long time. Mom asked "when to go home? " when calling.

Besides still no time, I'm also still reluctant if mama discusses brother Jo. But so far my mom has never asked me anything on the phone.

Either because they do not know something, or deliberately silent.

On the other hand, I started to see changes when I never saw Jo again.

He has started to be active again in social media, there are activities that appear to be uploaded to his sosmed account. It's good that way, I murmured.

Maybe he started trying to get up without me.

No matter how busy my activities on campus I always try to keep pace to study at the boarding school. Pursue some material that was left behind because it was busy taking care of people's children.

Because I no longer have to think about other people, I refocused on setting my goal to stay in the boarding school. Religious science, that's a definite goal. Hopefully, the bonus can be the blessing of the prospective in-laws, hehehe.

Trying to make peace with the circumstances, assuming that nothing ever happened between me and ustadz Billal, of course it is not easy.

Because ustadz Billal filled in some material, so there's no way I'll keep avoiding him. That means I'm constantly truant.

Sometimes the attention of ustadz Billal I feel more when in class, I feel bad for other students.

But what I can stop, Billal's feelings are his responsibility. Without being able to ask or refuse.

Even if half-dead I hate his love ustadz Billal, can I say "don't love me" then his love will just disappear.

Or, I should resort to bad and disrespectful means by cursing ustadz Billal. Then he'll get dirty and hate me. Sure it'll work? Unfortunately I don't have such an evil soul.

Do I have to be frank with ustadz Billal if I already love someone else. And my love for him is impossible. Didn't I precede fate if it were like that? While I myself do not know what the end of my story with Dian will be. Even though I always pray that we can be together.

Scribbles after graffiti I unconsciously pour over Arabic literature textbooks. It was his teacher, Ustadz Billal. Indeed yes, if the mind is no longer in that place it likes to make trouble.

"Kayra, can you come forward for a minute? " ustadz Billal's speech sounded loud from the front of the class.

Without feeling guilty I walked to the front of the class casually.

"yes ustadz" I replied as soon as I got to the front of the class.

"we didn't write wrong? " ustadz Billal put a notebook on me.

I read a glance and only realized that what I wrote was precisely the verse of Naff's song.

"astagfirullahalazim, sorry ustadz" what other words can I say besides that.

"fix after class is over, I will wait" said the ustadz.

I walked limp and lazy. I have to rethink, wait again. Must have failed to focus.

I'm not an artist, but why do I have to get caught in the middle of everything???

"what the hell Kay, here I see" whose name is Siska, ask permission yes at once take.

"ckckckckkck" he laughed.

"you anyway, jam lesson daydream" he reprimanded.

After finishing checking the textbook the lesson is back on.

I carefully watched before being hit by the target error for a second.

The lesson hours are over. The santriwati started coming out one by one. While I, inevitably have to stay to fix the wrong task.

"Sis. temenin donk" asked me when Siska would stand.

"maybe?? the ustadz wants to be alone with you" Siska even teased.

Spontaneously I directed the book in hand towards Siska's head.

"your brain is too far away to think" my speech reflexes hardened.

"what's up Kayra? " the ustadz is very sensitive to his ears.

"no ustadz" I answered briefly.

Then signaled Siska to sit back down.

Ustadz Billal still sits sweetly at the teacher's desk reading a book.

Siska seems to be studying another book. My best friend this one is really serious about studying now.

I painstakingly twisted my brain to finish quickly.

Ustadz Billal walked towards me and I started to be alert. Though also he is not the type of ustadz who is ignorant or centhil.

"don't hate me, or you'll have more trouble understanding the material" the ustadz stopped next to my table.

Instantly I looked up to hear the words of Ustadz Billal.

...Iiiihhhh, ni ustadz. Can't you not take care of the same mind of others continue?!!!!!...

My grouse in my heart, upset.

I continued my work without saying anything.

Thought to be leaving soon if not in ladenin, it turns out to be sitting on my front bench facing back.

Luckily there was Siska. So I don't have to worry. Be Siska and ustadz Billal.

Until I finish the task of ustadz Billal still faithfully waiting on my front bench.

Then the task I gave up and immediately tidied up my stationery.

Kaaaaaabbbbuuuuuurrrrrrr

Shouted me in the heart 😆

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Kayra ran away first..............