A LOVE THAT WAS NEVER OWNED
IGNORING THE TASTE
I determined inwardly, I would begin to ignore it. I would forget the mouthful of taste that was once built for her. I'd rather take care of my parents' hearts than fight for the love that I've always been unable to have.
Like this time when the clock came home.I immediately rushed out of class. I did not care about Rama . I momentarily forgot Lulu. I immediately left the school area. I don't care if anyone comes after me. I walk alone with full strength to heal all my wounds.
" i'm sorry. I know you're not wrong . but it's the circumstances that require us to be like this. I don't want to disappoint your parents let alone my parents. let me learn myself to heal this wound. long ago this love could not be had but us who are so selfish to keep reaching for it" said my heart trying to console itself.
I just kept walking . without looking back.
arriving at home I just say hello mamah then passed by leaving her. I felt too tired.not only my body was tired but my heart also felt very tired. now my whole soul and body are as if it were a crumble. I quickly passed to my room. I opened the door and I immediately threw my whole body on the bed. just now I felt my joints normal front door of my house sounded someone knocking.
" Sa. there is Rama" said mamah from behind the door.
" but mah.." I hung my words.
" meet first maybe there is something to talk about" said mamah remained calm.
I immediately went to see him.
" what's up here??" ask me when I'm in front of him.
" Yes what is this?? it's not usual for you to just pass by when you get home from school.was Lulu and I looking for you" he said questioningly.
" i'm tired!!! let's just end it all, even though we never know when we started it all" I said
" something that exists between us. It's free that we continue to defend everything while the situation does not want it"
" Yes... I do not understand.. Why do you suddenly decide all this??"
" i've been thinking about it for a long time. sejanan your mother came all the way to see me. But I can't leave you. I try to stay with you because I know you love me so much and I'm the same!!"
" does he really meet you?? by when??hold on. I beg you never to leave me!!!" groans begging.
" whether it happens I don't want to remember it. I want to forget the bad side that's around you. I was going to keep it all,, I was going to keep it all,, but your mother was determined to come here to see my mother and ask as she asked me!!!" my words are stirring - gebu.
" was my mother really that decade??"
" right!!! how could I lie to you . let alone this concerns your mother!!!" lantam.
" pardon him Yes.. I beg you!!! I'm too embarrassed to apologize to your mother.I'm disappointed to hear you did all that, but what's the power she's still my mother Sya" she said bitterly.
" so from now on we should try not to care about our feelings.I know you're innocent to me, I know you love me, but we can't be selfish like this. our happiness must sacrifice the trust of our parents.I beg you not to make me sin even more to you, to your mother, to my mother too"
" She... Don't I always ask you not to leave me??"
" i'm sorry, I never promised to always be by your side"
