A LOVE THAT WAS NEVER OWNED

HARD TO LOVE HER

Scroll the origin of the paper roll. no one wrong who it came from. he was looking at me sharp. I ignored it. something tickled in my heart .

" is it possible that he's JEALOUS???" I asked in my heart. Always in my heart. I was about to reply to the paper but I canceled it.

" you want to come with Lu?" ask Irfan when traveling home

" where?" ask Lulu.

" Meisha wants to buy a new novel"

" who said I want a new novel? the one who came here is not finished I read" I replied a little sniffly.

" just you guys, I'm still healing the fear of getting sick again"

" if you don't come, it's better not to be "I said.

" Yes..Don't! I'm not feeling good"

" well if you don't want to , don't be" Irfan was a little disappointed.

" well.but just buy a novel" I said. Irfan looked happy.

We also split up. I went with Irfan to the place where Irfan's paforit novel was.

" it's good, ''Let's see the synopsis"

irfan said while submitting 3 novels.

" don't have a lot of one is enough"

" which one do you want?"

" this is it" I replied origin.he bought 2 novels one for me one more for him. After that I immediately took Irfan home with the fear of my mother angry because I came home late.

on the way home I realized there was a figure following me. I know who he is. I don't know why he was always there in every existence with Irfan. or is this just a coincidence??

" who's dumb?" I said back to asking

" don't daydream later kesambet lho"

" h could be!"

" don't eat first?"

" it's not too late"

" we bought ice cream"

" well"

I choose ice cream that I want to eat as well as Irfan . thirsty - thirsty gini is given ice cream ahh delicious. without realizing there is a pull on my nose . and lovingly Irfan rubbed with his hands.deggg!!! I was surprised at his even more shocked treatment I thought about the feeling of the person who always followed me how he felt when he saw Irfan rubbing my nose.

instantly I was silent.it instantly felt bland this ice cream. wanted me to throw it away but I looked at Irfan who was really so happy because I was with me. I looked at him ,, looking at the look so happy,,,,, I thought,,, the face that had always comforted me, the one who had understood me, the one who had been with me all this time.

" where did my mind go when I was with Rama and was lulled with all the things about Rama? where was my mind when I was in my arms when Irfan was my lover?". I don't understand why I'm so hard to love Irfan??

" are you daydreaming again, miss?" tanyanya still joking.

" i was watching you eat ice cream instead of daydreaming sir" I joked.

" is that how I made you stupefied at me?"

" geer you.." I was so anxious.

for the first time I felt comfortable walking with Irfan . for the first time I ignored him who always followed me from behind. Could this be a good start? could it be that I have already started to open my heart to Irfan?? .

no way!!! how sweet Irfan is, how handsome he is still my heart does not tremble like when with Rama. Irfan is good even very good . I don't want to hurt him, , I want to give happiness to him.

" Fan .. You deserve better than me" I muttered unnoticed. Irfan was so surprised to hear my words.