Seabadi Edelwai..

Chapter 138 The holidays are over

Go home to the hostel with a mixed heart, happy, afraid, sad and many other feelings that now populate my heart.

"Oh my God..What did I just do to Vina?"

I said slowly and then threw the body on the bed.

My mind floated, remembering the piece of events in front of Vina's house earlier,

I touched my lips, then closed my eyes reabsorbed the taste that had made me drift lulled.

The longing slowly re-introduces infiltration and occupies the space of the heart.

But suddenly my eyes opened and sat down with a feeling of anxiety.

What if Vina is angry and hates me for what I did?

What if Vina stays away from me?

What if Vina doesn't want to know me anymore?

Fear now strikes me,

No!! I don't want that to happen!!

I still want to be with Vina despite not being who she is!

I stood up, and paced back and forth to drive away my agitation, and,

Then I decided to call Vina to apologize.

I'll grab my phone right away, and call her.

The tone of the call was heard, but my call was not raised, it made my heart more anxious.

"Come Vin, pick up donk...I beg you"

My inner.

Seconds, seconds,

"Yes Halle...."

There was a loud sound from across there.

Thank God, Vina finally picked up my phone, relieved but still pounding.

"Not slept?"

I'm still in misgivings.

"Yes, if I'm sleeping, how could I pick up your phone!!"

ketus again.

"Yes sorry, ehm Vin. about what happened, I...."

I haven't been able to continue my words, Vina has already cut my words.

"Stop!! no need to talk about it!"

Resistfully, the annoyed tone was still very clearly felt.

"Ehm... I know, you're disappointed in me, but. Let me apologize"

my words are sincere from the bottom of my heart, really... I'm afraid of losing Vina.

"Gung, yes, lupain, assume it never happened,"

His words made me feel even more guilty for what had happened, yet so.. I keep trying to be calm.

"Ehm..... Vin, what are you? Do you feel anything in your heart?"

Vina did not reply, a moment of silence between us, then not long,

"Ehm... feel what? nothing!! I'm going to sleep"

ketus again.

"Oh, maybe I'm the one who's overconfident, I thought...."

"You what??"

Cut Vina in a high tone, making me a little horrified to hear it.

"Ahh.. heheh not"

it was me, laughing falsely, when in reality I could hardly breathe because I was too anxious.

"Ihh.. What the hell, not clear!! You sleep hunt, tomorrow's bad luck"

Oh my... Vina's still attentive? or this is just a form of conversation transfer that Vina did so that I did not nudge any more problems earlier.

now the worry comes to my mind.

I don't know why I can be this aggressive, asking Vina, when obviously it's just futility, because it won't make her heart melt and let me in.

"Start dehhh... Udah, do not need to miss, until there, hunt find a girlfriend yes. let there be a cure if kangen"

answer Vina.

"Vin, what's the cure for you?"

I still hope until when.

"It can't be, kangennya I've ordered, already no stock!"

Vina answered again broke the heart that actually no longer looks shape.

I should have been aware and knew from the beginning, it would be like this answer coming out of Vina's mouth, but why do I still provoke questions that ultimately hurt my own heart, she said, now all I do is gulp and bitter disappointment, but really I am strong and have been very used to this taste.

"Oh, yes... I often forget about your first love!"

I'm trying to be okay, always okay, I'm immune to this kind of disappointment.

"Hahha.. can you!!"

"Look, I'm not your first love, I hope one day to be your true love heheheh"

the words I made as my own entertainer when my mind was completely down and my spirit was being tested.

"Jiaahhh... Speaking of what the hell!!"

"Vin, someday if there is no certainty from Him, and you are tired, you say yes.Let me wipe that tired with the taste I have.."

Once again silent, Vina silently did not answer.

"Vin... You're still listening to me right?? Hello, Vin's sleeping??"

I tried to resuscitate him if it turned out that Vina was stunned because of my words.

"Eh. yeah, halooo... Yes, I heard it.."

Vina answered stammeredly, indicating that she had just daydreamed, I don't know what she was thinking, yes. Hopefully my words can open Vina's heart a little about her belief in a story about a first love.

"You why? my words make you uncomfortable, don't they?"

I'm trying to guess.

"Ehm... who said it??"

"I never meant for you to choose Me, nor did I say that I'm better, but I promised myself that I'd always be there for you,"

I'm getting more and more intense.

" Thank you Gung! the one I've known"

This answer, in fact, is normal, but somehow my heart hurts to hear it, when this is a reality that I should be able to receive chest airy because this is what my relationship and Vina have been like since long ago.. but why...now become a wound every time I hear it?

But ah. Never mind, I don't want to drag on in hurt feelings.

Let's just say, it's an unfinished struggle.

Phone ends,

And I fell asleep in the hammock of hope.

......................

After dawn, I was awake, preparing to return to Samarinda and to leave my hometown.

Pack a backpack and sit on your own by the bed waiting for a little bright day.

After returning the room key and dirty key, I by taxi online left the boarding house to the airport which is not too far away.

Still waiting, though,

Shortly before Flying left Palembang, I looked back and hoped Vina would suddenly appear to just wave and smile at me, but that was impossible.

I reached into my pocket, pulled out my phone and checked it.

Nihil, no phone or message entered, it means that I am not a special person in the heart of Vina, even to just send a message carefully on the road only Vina no time.

So, should I be disappointed because of this?

very human, but of course it does not diminish my affection and love for him, I am blind... I've been deaf and maybe even I've been Mad to the point of no longer seeing another love, Because Vina seemed to have bound me with her charm chains until it was hard for me to run and even move.

In my heart desire to call him in addition to miss hearing his voice, I also want to say goodbye, but. ah. never mind, did I do it last night, the problem of longing.

I turned off the phone I was holding, though,

after Today.. I don't know when I'll come back here again, but I'm sure one day I'll come back with the same feeling.It never changes, unless I come back to attend Vina's wedding, Vina,, maybe that's the limit of the stopping point of my hope and struggle, with great sincerity I'll let Vina achieve her happiness.

Connect***