Monster Labile

Was wrong?

I who too often feel pleasure have understood that there will come a time when problems make me very bad. I don't know why I think pleasure is the beginning of pain. People say that they laugh a lot too much.

What about me who has had so much fun?

I hesitated to have fun. I have tried to make everything change but always failed.

Not long after the class. Reza from my class wants to move to IPS. He will automatically move classes. What made her want to move became the first question in the minds of our classmates. After a sports lesson a few days ago we played ball, his cock got dropped from the ball. Of course we guys who played with him laughed amusedly. He was on his stomach in front of me, I was guarding the goal, others had played again the ball in the middle of the field.

"Reza you're not papa?" I stopped smiling and became anxious.

Is he in a lot of pain? a few seconds later he got up and came back to play. I felt a strange desire from him. Is it my fault that it makes her feel bad to be in this class?

He made excuses that in this class it would be difficult for him to reach a high rank. Really it? I don't know.

I saw her cheerful on the road with Bobby. Maybe that's what's best for him. And I started to ignore.

The voice began to sound doubtful. What I see and feel makes my heart doubt. I have ignored many things.

In the class I spoke to the most was Bobby and Ahmadi, they both made me comfortable. I don't know what strange desire makes me often close to both of them. Is there a sense of equality? or is it a feeling of loss? You know I'm a little inferior when I'm close to someone who has more possessions and a sense of loss after parting with the class first. Feelings begin to mix.

How do you laugh sincerely? I don't remember, I've forgotten it.

And only then did I realize that deep down inside my heart there was a cold feeling that I had never felt before. Slowly changing my personality.

When Gania called me for a money joint celebrating our homeroom birthday, Via asked me what relationship I had with her. I glared at him. I was angry and then sorry. Whereas if I was the one who would normally be indifferent or kind but now different. They're noisy. That's what makes me angry. I don't know what's right.

Via was mobbed and asked by another friend why it made me angry..

I'm sorry I'm worried about the changes I'm going through.

When I was invited by my classmates I refused. I should have loved getting the chance to join them but I prefer to be with the new class. Does that mean I've moved on from them? Or intentionally swallow bitter?

I'm just confused. The absence of backrests messed me up. Who am I going to confide in? all are acquaintances and no one will understand me.

Murly of course I was moody but strangely enough I could still smile. What made me do that? to show a false expression. I don't know.

Simultaneously all the emotions I could carry were shoulder to shoulder.

Zheill asked me once. Why do I like Aulia? very familiar question. My answer is of course not to use it. I never asked for his help in terms of lessons. Getting close is difficult because there are walls blocking it. Then I like him because he's cool. A figure that would probably be the answer to another question I was looking for. I knew that we would never be able to have a serious relationship because of my instincts that said so. I covered it up for another reason.

When Seha tried to approach me with a light talk I rejected her directly. Wh why? it's not that I'm jealous but there's another disturbing feeling coming from him. He was trying to tell me something important. I know that's why I just stayed away from him. I know that but I don't know what to do. When I stay away, am I wrong?

When I was asked if I liked Shevira by my homeroom teacher. I don't know what to answer. Why would my homeroom teacher ask such a strange student of his? it came to my mind to answer that question. I said no because he was bad. Wowh so great you pis. Now you'll be hated by everyone. How else I don't know what to answer. Everything's noisy. Is it wrong to answer that? What's wrong is why I'm still getting close to them.

When I was testing a sports lesson for shooting basketball. I just put 2 in the ring. Maximum 3 times in different positions. That's enough to get a moderate value. But I was too happy and expressed it excessively to other friends. Shit I just realized, my high body makes it easy to shoot, different from others. I stopped being happy. Just bemoaned the mistake.

Bobby started to dislike my noisy presence. I talk too much. I know that because her aura shows a little feeling to avoid me. I talk too much, too much nonsense comes out of my mouth. Bizarrely.

How can I be overreacting?

What makes me overreact?

Almost all actions are based on instinct without thinking. I talk, I learn, I hang out with others, everything moves on its own without me asking.

Is this what the personality mask means?

If then my current situation is very bad. Severe times when I express it excessively.

This is what must be perfected!

It would be wrong if my actions harm the people around me.