Hold on or let go!

Eps 83s

Early in the morning Lek Dar was back at his house. I'm in my house alone. While waiting for the sun to rise, I took a walk in my yard. As was my previous habit, I swept the dirty yard of the house because of the fallen rambutan leaves.

There was almost half an hour I was driving around sweeping the yard of the house. Sometimes I greet my left right neighbor. It feels bored every time I am asked where Alby is.

While resting, I sat on the terrace footing while straightening my legs. I rubbed my calves and also my stomach which I think is now a hard habit.

I leaned my hands back, my head up and closed my eyes.

"Sir!", there was someone who seemed to be talking to me. I took the position as before to find out who called me.

I was surprised to find out who just called me 'nduk'.

"You want what?", I asked flatly. Yes, she was the mother who gave birth to me but also abandoned me. He could have shown his face in front of me.

"Wes breakfast?", he asked.

"Later!", I replied briefly. My mother smiled faintly at me.

"What business is there here?", I asked again.

"Mother kangen koe nduk!", she said as she tried to hug me. But I retreated so that there would be some distance between us.

"What's your purpose here?", I asked again. The couple threw each other a glance. Jij** I saw it!

"You have breakfast, Nduk? The shop is not open yet. Besides, you can't possibly cook anyway? Nothing cooked???"

I smiled cynically.

"I can still afford to eat. Sorry, you seem to be overdoing it if you're worried about me. It's not the time to worry about my situation, let alone just stomach business!"

"Astaghfirullah Bi!", my mother was about to grab my shoulder again. But I backed out of my seat again.

"Sir, can we talk inside. We want to talk important. You have been misunderstanding for a long time. Let's get this straight, shall we?" said my mother's husband, Anton.

"Necessary! I don't need any explanation. It doesn't change the situation if you don't exist." I got up from my seat.

The couple took a long breath.

The woman who had only been at odds for eighteen years with me also rose up.

"When do you want to listen to our explanation? It's been years. It's true, after we explain later your father will not live again. But we want to know. Not everything is what Bia thinks!"

I was silent no longer speaking his words.

"You see Febri again?", asked my mother. I immediately looked at her face which if I saw her getting more beautiful at her age which was still about five years away towards the number fifty.

"Yes." Yeah."

I answer briefly.

"He is Bi."

"What does it have to do with me?", I asked as I squinted my eyes.

"Mother is only afraid that you will falter after knowing that Febri is alone."

"What does that mean?", I asked with a sharp look.

"Bia..mom mean....!"

"Don't call you mother! And help! I'm not you! don't equate me like you who are still a wife and even have an affair with another man!"

Plakkkkp!

A slap landed on my cheek. I rubbed the former slap. While my mother just stared at the palm of her hand that she just used to slap me.

"Cure!", cried my mother's husband.

"Don't because you gave birth to me, then you have the right to slap me."

Without my tears just escaping. I was in a hurry to wipe away those tears. I don't want to look weak in the face of betrayals like them.

"sorry!", mother almost touched my face.

"Go!", I said flatly.

"But we want to explain something Bia. It is up to you to hear my father's explanation that you will behave as we do. Please nduk!", said Anton.

"You are not my father!", I said cynically.

"Yes, sorry! But we just straighten out the nduk. Maybe it doesn't change the past, but we just want you to be free with that misunderstanding."

I look up not to look at my stepfather's face.

I was still standing there.

"Before your father became ill, he advised that after he died, I immediately married your mother."

"Ckkkk! This is not a novel world!", I said cynically.

"Sir, you can hate me. Please! But don't hate your mother and your sisters."

I'm looking in no direction. Yes, maybe I was wrong to have been less kind to Esa yesterday.

"Your father is sick, prostate disorders in addition to the complications he suffered nduk. And. he cannot give an inner living, to your mother. He felt cruel to your mother. You know, I was just a familiar newcomer to your father. Even the kindness of your father need not be doubted Nduk. I admit it!"

My chest suddenly tightened.

"Father gave me a will to marry your mother soon after your father's death. Sounds cliche indeed! Your mother seemed to be in a hurry to get married again because she had not earned an inner living from your father for a long time. It's not Nduk, is it! But our hands are only two! We can't keep the mouths of those who don't know the truth."

"We never cheated on Nduk! Never!", Anton explained again.

"But what I saw, you cried every night before he died! He must be hurt by your betrayal!"

"ngga! It's not like that!", now my mother's the voice.

"Bia, I know. Maybe until anytime you'll hate me. Again, please! But you should know, you never cheat. Especially make your nyakitin Nduk!"

My chest is rumbling. Suddenly my stomach was cramping. It hurts amazing! I held my stomach.

"Awsss.!", I almost staggered and fell if Anton didn't catch me.

"Oh Allah!", my mother came to me.

"Maybe Bia hasn't had breakfast yet, take her to breakfast first!"

Without waiting for my approval, I was also in papah sitting kofa. Just sitting down, Lek Sarman entered in a hurry.

"Enek opo Iki?", asked Lek Sarman worriedly.

(What is this?)

The couple looked at Lek Sarman. He sat right next to me.

"Why nduk?", asked Lek Sarman again.

"My stomach is cramping!", I replied softly.

"Sorry, your lek nembe ae is done cooking Bi."

I'm nodding. Now my lek's gaze was staring at the couple.

"I want breakfast for Bia, Man!", said my mother. But Lek Sarman did not understand his words.

"With breakfast, we go to the midwife, Nduk. Lek is afraid why-why your baby!", said Lek Sarman.

"Will she be pregnant?" asked my mother. Lek Sarman nodded.

"Alhamdulillah!", said the couple.

"I'm nothing lek! eating the same rest is enough."

''Yakin koe nduk?", asked Sarman to make sure.

"Yes lek!"

"Yo wes. breakfast first yes. Em...want the side dish of lek Dar what is your mother?" lek Sarman was worried.

''Feel the Lek Dar!" I grabbed the Tupperware that Sarman lek brought. I know my mom's disappointed. But I was trying to digest and accept their explanation.

I am so stubborn! But, am I really being disobedient???? Is it wrong of me to hate my mother...????

*****

Sorry if there are less yak strokes??? There will be a time later, Heheheh

Thanks for reading here 🙏

From noon here is still testing until now gaes. What about your place????a

Image only sweetener 😅😅😅😅 ga denkkkkk 🙏🙏🙏🙏