Hold on or let go!

Eps 152

I busied myself in the stall. Lek Dar and Lek Sarman return to the village of Lek Dar which is on the border of central Java and east Java. There's lek Dar's brother who's an idol and they'll be there a few days. I live alone in Lek Sarman's house. In addition to the stalls provided mes for male employees, but not for female employees because some are native children of my area whose home can still be reached round and forth.

I don't know why there was such a bad taste in my chest. Fidgety or what I call it I don't know. Obviously, I'm not calm. Scroll my phone, no notification from anyone.

A hufft! Lonely right me???!!!

Who exactly am I waiting for? Alby then? Or...other people?

I leaned my head against the back of the sofa. There's a picture of the late father on the wall of this room. Yes, this stall is the legacy of the father who lek Sarman continues and runs very well until this moment. I just take it right, isn't that a joy to be grateful for?

I closed my eyes for a moment. Alby's shadow flashed through my eyes. He was handsome, gentle and always made me laugh. Accepting all my shortcomings that are not from a whole family.

I remember the last memory of him saying goodbye to work with Asep's kang. The same anxious feeling I feel right now. Did something happen to Alby? Last time we communicated was when we had a fight a few days ago when he said that if he chose to save Silvy then he would leave the young woman to come back to me.

I should be happy, right? That's what I've been hoping for all along, right? But ..nuraniku said that Alby was so evil to treat us. Silvy is pregnant with baby Alby.

Regarding filing a lawsuit that requires a domicile statement, I have asked the person I trust to take care of it. After all, I just used the services of a lawyer.

My phone clinks. That means someone called. I was hoping it was Alby, but it turned out to be Anika.

[My mom, how are you?]

So chat from Anika. I was disappointed, because it wasn't from Alby. But yeah, that's okay.

[Alhamdulillah good deck, tumben. What's up?]

Anika lays her body on the bed while typing a message for Bia.

[Can I ask mba?]

[What?]

[Is Mba Bia seriously really splitting up with Mas Alby?]

[Yes]

Answer briefly.

[Mba Bia knows Silvy is sick?]

[Know, it was Alby who told me]

Anika rose from her fall.

[Then?]

[Not change anything Deck. Maybe Anika needs Alby far more, than me]

Anika gaped in disbelief.

[O Allah!]

[Whoever deck, you should rest. College tomorrow, right?]

[Yes, yes bye ..]

[yes]

After texting each other with Anika, I put my phone back. I wonder, why did Anika suddenly ask like that?

Suddenly I thought, did Silvy ask Anika to ask me that? Has their relationship improved?

The wall clock has shown at half eleven in the evening. I'm confused what I'm gonna do. Even my sleepiness has not come.

Because join, I try to open the nightstand drawer that I haven't opened for a long time maybe. Yes, I like to move to sleep. Sometimes in this house, sometimes in my house.

The contents of my drawer are still the same as before. Unchanged, even displaced.

There is a small 3R photo album. I opened the page one by one. Don't ask whose photo it is? It was a photo of my memories together.... Febrile.

Photos of your love journey from the gray white period, Febri's education period, our LDR period and ending in separation. Hufft!

From day to day Febri's physical changes became more visible. Febri who was gouging, slowly became a tall and burly figure. Maybe it was the impact of his physical training to form his posture like now.

I smiled at the photo where I was still wearing my gray white uniform, while Febri had a plontos head. Our pose looks very lame because our height is quite much different.

Leaving behind the SMK period, I began to open photos of us who had grown up. Febri's graduation photo from Akmil and our story travel at point four years ago.

Ckkk. I closed the album hard. Why do I remember and even keep it. Uh..ralat, I didn't mean to keep it. This room used to be occupied by the late Princess, my cousin who was five years younger than me.

It's raining again tonight. Cold, quiet, and silent. Luckily, there is no electricity and no electricity. Because I'd be scared if that happened.

I tried to close my eyes while I turned on the murotal Qur'an on my phone. Slowly.I began to fall asleep!

*****

Tok.dok..

"Shortly!", I said as I opened the door.

I was surprised to see Alby at the door.

"Why are you here?", I asked Alby. Without answering my question, Alby jutsru walked into the living room. I followed him too.

"Well what else are you here for?", I asked flatly. But Alby looked down, not looking me in the eye at all.

"Aa miss is the same!", replied Alby in the end.

"Ckkk.!", I just clucked while folding both my hands on my chest. I was still standing not far from the door.

Alby got up from his seat and approached me.

"Is there really no chance for Aa?", asked Alby right in front of my face. I can even feel his breath. I looked up, while Alby slightly lowered his head to compensate for our body position.

"Yes!", answered briefly.

"No more love for Aa?"

"Love? Do you still need an answer to your question?", I asked back.

"Answer! Neng is still in love with Aa?", he asked softly right in front of my face.

I tried to turn my face away, really if until I was lulled with my husband's handsome face I would definitely go back wavering. But considering that she wasn't just mine, I felt pain in my chest. I slowly pushed that face. And, yeah, he's a little backwards. But our position is still the same, only his face is slightly away.

"Silent you answered Bi."

Slowly the body moved away from me.

He called my name without frills 'neng' as usual?

I saw him close his eyes while raising his head. I heard her breathing hard.

"Shabia Ayu bint Salman Abdullah, from this moment I fall to you!", said Alby trembling.

The deg! My eyes are breaking. Without the command, my tears melted.

Sick? Nah! But it really hurts! I can't say anything. Yeah, that moment has arrived.

Didn't I ever challenge her to divorce me? Didn't I take care of my divorce with Alby? But why am I this sick to hear Alby say that???

I squeezed my chest firmly, my pain was really not described by anything.

"Arrrgggghhh!", I gasped. My body is shaking violently. I rubbed my face rough .

What does this mean?? Is Alby really gonna tell me that? Or..this is the answer to my doubt?

I wiped the rest of my tears. Did I really cry during that nightmare?

A glass of water on the nightstand I finished up the toilet. The wall clock is showing at three in the morning. If I had finished nifas, I would have done two rakaat sunahku.

I got out of bed and headed to the kitchen. I don't know what I'm gonna do at this early hour.

The words were ringing in my eyes. Yeah, really! Like real!

I took the phone out of my pajama pocket. I open my green application just to open the contact status app on my phone.

Ting....

A chat came in.

Febrit? Mumbles.

[Not sleeping yet?]

So was the initial chat from Febri.

[Newly awake]

I answer briefly.

[It's still early in the morning]

After being answered like that, I no longer reply to Febri chat.

[Sleep again?]

[No]

[By the phone?]

I hesitated to answer that simple question but it turned out Febri didn't need my answer. He called me even on video call.

I put on the bergo on the dinner table bench.

[Assalamualaikum Nduk]

[Capitaly]

I saw Febri wearing a black peci, maybe he finished tahajud. Oh God, don't let me be charmed by him!

[Koe kenek opo nduk? How about ene wes Tangi?]

(You why nduk? How is the clock waking up?]

[not opo-opo mas]

[Udan tah?]

(Hujankah?)

[City]

[Jeh Wedi udan know you?]

(Still afraid of your praise?)

[Ga Wedi mas's. I want to go to Tangi ae]

(A fear of the. I want to wake up]

Silent!

[Opo dreamt of elek?]

(What's the nightmare?)

Oh, how did he know? Does he still remember my habit that if a nightmare would definitely not be able to sleep anymore?

[No]

[Nduk, yesterday Ika nemenin jenguk Silvy. I also met Mak Titin]

[Oh]

That's my only advice.

[You don't want to know about Mak?]

[Oh, how's Mak doing?]

Do I really no longer care about my mom? Ask myself.

Febri looked to be breathing.

[Mak's good, but Silvy's not]

[Oh]

Again, only 'oh' came out of my mouth.

[Nduk, sorry!]

[Sorry for what?]

[Mas will always be waiting for you!]

[I mean?]

[Mas will always be waiting for you if you're.back to Alby].

What did Febri mean to say that?I didn't respond to Febri's remarks.

[Forget! Mending now you sleep again, have not started praying right?]

I nodded thinly.

[Yes, I want to make coffee first. You rest again, thanks for picking up the phone. Assalamualaikum]

[Guardiansalam]

Why did Febri say that? What's he thinking?

I took my hijab back. Yes, even though Febri knew everything that was on me but when I was Alby's wife, only Alby had the right to see what I was like.

But ... The dream was real. I even felt a tightness like it was really happening. Oh God, whatever it is I give it to you.

*****

Maapkeun seagrass grope typo and gaje really. Continues to...Mon sorry also if mamak's money has passed 🤭, but if you can go back again dong, right??? How to..thank you guys suggestions and comments ye gaes 😄. Mamak receive any comments and suggestions you with open arms 🤗 so you can fix the shortcomings in this piece of work 😉🙏🙏🙏

Maap also if it turns out the plot is not as you expect ⁇ ️🙏

Anyway mah, one day Shabia Ayu will find her happiness heheheh.

Thanks for arriving in this chapter, I'm with you a tree 🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩