I Choose You!
#37 Doubt Attractors
“Iya, Rashida. Quick run,” he brought his face closer, “Let grandfather take care of this evil child.”
Don'tdon't….
He let me go. Back to the Jagad who was not even strong to sit. Keep showing when he is still strong, holding his elbow to the ground. However, the rotten man did not tolerate holding Jagad with his feet.
Nay!
“Aargh! Eeg! Gee! Gah!!”
Stopit! Please stop it!! Don't beat up a jagad like that! Please!
I covered my face with both hands. Terrified. Unable to see the Jagad being constantly tortured. The sound of the blow and the unrelenting scream of the Jagad.
The voice finally calmed down. The fingers with their interludes become my peep.
A corn?
The face of the corn is worse than ever. He looks weak. Like there was no more energy left, his eyes were already very thin. The smile facing me scared me even more.
A corn? Why did you close your eyes?
“Hah...,” this man does not know care and straighten his body.
He stroked something while getting closer to himself. Squatting him in front of me showed me a black L thing that I knew was deadly.
“Come out there,” her index finger points to my right, “Grandpa tipped greetings for your papa huh?”
My irregular breathing ran rampant from the front of my breathing to the tip of the root in my lungs. The brain falters, but one thing I have to agree on. What am I gonna do here for?
I gotta go. I need to get help for Jagad and Ira. I have to go! Move Rasyi!
Hands unable to tread, at least he was able to distance myself from the man. His smile that still looked at me was like a chase. Urged my hand to erect my body on my feet.
Stand Rasyi! Stand, go. I have to go!
Stepping while you can. Unable to look back. The land plains are not always flat, swallowing unbalanced steps. Hold on one by one to an infinite green affluence due to the day.
Slowly but surely, I left Jagad with that cruel man⏤
DOR'S!
“Rasyi.”
Aaa! Me... at the dinner table?
Right.. It's my dinner time. That uncontrollable hallucination was only in my mind. There's no way I'm really playing a part in that incident again.
The jagad that left, that terror, happened four years ago.
“Why, hmm?” papa's?
My attempt to shake my head only produced a small movement, “No....”.
It must be just a passing memory. Not once twice have I even been lying with a sleeping flower like that. Like habits. I shouldn't have been shaken as much as I am now.
I realized papa was sitting on my left side dining table chair, “What's in school?”
Rizki must have caught my body shocks, “No. Just... remember the horror movie.. have friends.”.
His left elbow stuck to the dining table, tilting his gaze more towards me.
That shallow reason would not be considered right by him.
“It's race season, means Aaron? Loneliness?”
Hm? How could you know that Aaron and I rarely get together because of the race? I have no story. Papa was basically never interested in a story like this.
“Not that, hmm?” he was like thinking, “Si twins?”
Why did the guess go that way? I'm gonna be fine. There has been debate between me and Saga, but it's nothing big but ongoing misunderstanding.
The rest, the usual school. It's just that the afternoon before tonight feels exhausting. There is no energy even to speak. The masculine beside me also knew that if I was tired, I easily remembered the bad things in the past.
The arid memory of the figure who presented me with a bracelet in my hand, also included.
However, papa must have been worried that I was re-attributing the suffering.
“Saga talk rough about Jagad?”
Hm?
“He does not know Jagad. Not intentionally, right?”
My mouth cannot say anything from the analysis of papa that is beyond common sense. My weak telephones gave me claps three times.
It's not wrong for Saga to remind me of Jagad's death. Not the right thing is caused by it. It's purely because I'm tired.
“The Corn Problem is done. What else does Rasyi have?”
... somehow.
The silence was replaced with a papa who changed his position. Tilting completely sat down at me and focused his hands like a pillar to the face. Head up while stacking his legs.
Cool calm voice was heard, “Rasyi still think? Papa's a dinosaur, iceberg keeper?”
I'm dumbfounded. It is so unexpected and so indescribable as to why it is discussed.
“Means, if Rasyi...” he thinks of what else? “Rabbit? Not... con artist rabbits.”
“Weak.”
Oo. Alright. That's quite a waste of time.
“But rabbits can win against wolves.”
... then?
He continued his paragraph, “Sometimes stupid, sometimes fearless. Sometimes I want to know, sometimes I am afraid to know. Her stubbornness makes her difficult to guess.”
Doesn't that just describe me from his point of view? What does he want to do by hooking myself up with a rabbit?
I really can't dig into the roots of this person beside me.
“And the important thing, he has a reason,” I still listen to the sentence Rizki random, “Can be for family, for friends, or for her own who want to be loved, Rizki,” this man points at me with his free hand, “If the impostor, how?”
Is that what it means. I have no reason?
Fear, anger, sadness and dislike. Everything I do. Papa thinks it has no reason?
Of course I have! That's....
Papa's? She standing? Where are you going?!
“If Rasyi has a reason...!” I managed to stop this guy, “Then?”
He looked at me with his brownish sad eyes, “Rabbit likes carrots right?”
Wow, what does that have to do?!
“Rasyi see use this,” my forehead, he pointed to knock it, “Dumb or just forgot?”
Forgot it?
“Peel, chew, digest. Many branches to see.”
I rolled my eyes, “What's the difference in thinking?” back to the beginning of the dizziness, right?
He bent his body, bowed towards me, “What are his friends, if Rasyi just doesn't think?”
He's?
Papa pointed in front of me a few centimeters below my throat, “This eye is not for thinking. But let's remember the limits. Do not origin mastered this same eye.”
I'm sure if what you mean by that is not to get carried away with my feelings. I need to think clearly with my brain.
“So,” he re-enforced his body and folded both his hands, “The reason? Solution?”
‘Why am I like this,’ mean he is like that?
Because I'm mad at Saga if she likes to take punches. Because I've been scared ever since I remembered the incident.
Then why would I be like that? What reason?
Don't tell me I've been stuck in the old stuff? I found the solution with my dad in the same year.
Then I just played my own heart dong? Until forgot.
My face looks up to papa, “Receive..”.
Bright smile. It can't get out of that face. But his brown eyes seemed to change color and brighten, signifying the positive atmosphere behind his thin smile.
Rubbed my face with those big hands, “Spend the meal.”
Huuh.
Aye?
“Papa go where?” in the real sense. Just realized he was busy with his suitcase bag, “Job again?”
“Iya.”
“Sudden pocket?” usually he told it first at least three days before leaving.
“Included.”
Well, how else. Papa is indeed a genius doctor, “Another week?”
Why silence? “More. Papa doesn't know until when.”
Oo. That would be damning.
“You are staying again in Hendra?” he looked at my face.
I shook my head, “No. Rasyi here only.”
“Sorry, even though Rasyi is trouble again,” Papa seems to approach me again. Clap my head, “Kacauin is fine.”
Heh?
“Papa who finished all.”
Unanswered.
We are not so keen to exchange feelings. Papa is frozen hearted. But the one thing that looks in those pretty eyes, unfortunately, is that I'm too sweet to be bitten.
Tickled tickle happy in my heart, smile can not fade, “Iya~”
