Linger

Blue Hydrangeas

Time went by quickly without Kalea noticing. Since their last meeting that morning (when Gavin asked him to run in the morning and ended up talking to Mama and Papa) Gavin has not contacted him at all. Today has already been six days. Not a single message entered Kalea's phone even though it was just a pleasant talk asking for news or whether he had eaten or not.

Kalea itself is not typical of people who like to reply to messages with others. He does not like pleasantries, so short messages such as good morning or a line of encouragement to start the day is not something that suits him. But now, for some reason, Kalea really wished for such a message to come from Gavin.

"This is what it's like in ghosting?" I don't know who it was to. He stared at the phone in a hand whose screen seemed dim. Not a single notification came in since hours ago he sat in his studio. Even just a notification from a mobile operator that informs that the pulse is up and the number is in a grace period does not exist. It was as if everyone was conspiring to ignore him, making him lonely and feeling abandoned.

"Si Karel also tumben not spam chat? He usually shows off this."

Somehow Kalea even brought the name Karel in her scolding. The boy was on a business trip to Bali three days ago. Said the business trip, to meet the farmer who will be a supplier of coffee beans for his cafe, but Kalea believes the boy is just making it up. Karel must have only used business travel as an excuse, when in fact he just wanted a vacation. Wash your eyes by looking at a Caucasian girl whose clothes are lacking in materials. Karel was like that, looking at the body bohay women, but always nagging at Kalea when she was wearing shorts or clothes that were slightly open. If Kalea protests, the annoying boy will tell her that Kalea's body is not good so it should not be exhibited. Huh! It's bullshit!

Kalea's attention then turned to the canvas in front of which she had already painted half-finished. It was a natural landscape painting that was set on the beach, when dusk crept up and the sun moved slowly back to the western horizon. For a long time, Kalea dreamed of being in such a situation with someone she loved. Not only Papa, Mama or Karel, but Kalea wants to spend such a warm twilight with someone who is able to provide comfort. Someone he loves and loves himself.

"What do you expect anyway, Kal? I've only met twice, I've been hoping for a grandiose visit to Gavin."

"Cash, Kal. Wish it was God, not man. Finally disappointed!" Kalea nags herself. Because his mood did not improve, he finally decided to leave the painting he was working on. Let the painting be finished later when the mood is good.

Kalea stepped out of the studio, making sure she had locked the door properly before walking down the stairs. Now at one hour past fifteen minutes, he began to feel hungry. This morning Mama told him to come with Papa on a short business trip out of town, so no one yelled at him for a meal. Since morning, Kalea has not put anything in her mouth other than water.

When he reached the kitchen, he found Bi Imah was busy cutting apples. He casually picked up a piece that had just been placed on a plate and then put it in his mouth.

"Kalea's neng wants to eat?" asked Bi Imah, thrusting another piece of apple in front of Kalea's mouth and was immediately grabbed by the girl, although in fact in her mouth there was still a piece of apple before which she had not finished chewing.

"What does Baby cook?" kalea asked with her mouth full of apple pieces.

"Sumi rica's. If Neng wants to eat now, let Bibi be ready." bargain Bi Imah who has finished cutting all the apples.

"No need to worry, Bi, thank you. Kalea take it for yourself." Kalea walked to the dinner table, picked up another piece of apple before sitting herself in one of the chairs and began filling the dishes that were already available there with rice and pepper squid.

"Did you eat?" tanyanya, intend to invite the housekeeper to eat together.

"Udah, it was the same with Mr. Dadang." Bi Imah replied with a typical gentle smile.

Kalea mangosteen then began to feed the rice into his mouth. He enjoyed the food in silence because Bi Imah seemed busy cleaning up the groceries that were previously scattered on the counter to then be moved to the refrigerator.

Just three mouthfuls of Kalea eating, the bell at his house rang several times, inviting wrinkles on his forehead that were getting more and more noticeable. Who comes in this afternoon? And why is the bell coming from the front door, not the gate? Why did Mr. Dadang let strangers into his yard?

Then Kalea put down her spoon and hurriedly got up from the chair as she realized that Mr. Dadang would never do it. The middle-aged man would not let any stranger enter through the gate, no matter what. Then the one who had rang the bell in his house must have been someone they had known.

"Let Auntie open the door, Neng. Neng Kalea continued to eat." Prevent Bi Imah. But Kalea just shook her head. He already stood up.

"It's okay, Kalea. Bi Imah just finish the refrigerator." Kalea said then she walked away from the kitchen. His steps seemed rushed as he walked towards the front room. The bell rang a few more times before he got to the door.

"Yes, patience!" His shouting. Though he knew someone out there wouldn't be able to hear him yell.

Before the bell was pressed back, Kalea pulled the big door in front of her. Only to be speechless pecking with a fallen jaw and a gawking facial expression that was not at all pretty.

"Hello, Kalea."

Kalea looked at Gavin who was sitting on the living room sofa with a gaze that was hard to translate. From the past few minutes, he had only let Gavin sit on the sofa without asking the man to talk at all. The tea presented by Bi Imah was also completely untouched by Gavin because the man was even busy frowning to find himself stared at to the extent by the host.

Kalea's view then turned to the blue Hydrangea flower bucket on the table. Gavin brought the flower here. Apparently, it had gotten that far Gavin knew about him. Though about him who likes blue Hydrangea flowers really only Mama who knows. Karel the rancid boy who was everywhere always alone with him did not know about this. Ah, Mama seems eager to make Gavin a daughter-in-law, so that the woman is willing to share as much information as she can with this man.

"I..interrupted your time, huh?" gavin asked, starting to feel bad because he had come so suddenly without informing him beforehand.

Kalea turned her gaze back towards Gavin. "Disturb me anyway, only I'm confused why you suddenly came here - plus bring the flower." Kalea pointed at the flower bucket on the table using her chin because her hands had been folded in front of her chest for some time.

Gavin took a glance at the flower bucket he was carrying, then smiled. "Mama said you like Hydrangeas in blue." Then looked back at Kalea with a still-patched smile.

"You came here just to anterin the flower to me? Just because Mama said I like it?" ask Kalea. I don't know why his tone so impressed like a person who is upset. Or perhaps, he was upset that Gavin had not been preaching for days. But, is he entitled? How far has Gavin gone to get that he can be annoyed at Gavin not contacting him? I don't know, Kalea is also dizzy with her own thoughts.

"The flowers are just excuses, I'm actually here to see you." Gavin's smile still didn't fade.

"Meet me? Make what?" Ah, Kalea really can no longer control herself. He was really upset for no apparent reason.

"Cuz I miss you."

Gavin is fucking! It could be that this man said such a sentence casually, as if he did not know that the effect could make Kalea in a fog.

Kalea cleared her throat which suddenly felt hoarse and dry. Like he had just swallowed grains of sand until it felt uncomfortable.

"Have you been busy lately?" tanya Kalea tried to cover up the fact that she was being misbehaved.

"Yes, I've been busy dealing with a few things. Sorry I don't have time to see you often."

"The time is already sophisticated, do not have to meet in person to be able to chat or just exchange news." Kalea had no idea she could be this bright to someone she had only known for a few days. During this time he was quite closed and thought a lot before saying something to others. But with Gavin, how could he be this bright to reveal the thing that was troubling his heart?

Gavin chuckles and it sucks. The man in a white shirt whose arms are rolled up to the elbow now looks like a jerk who likes to play with women's hearts. Kalea was upset, so she threw a sharp glare at Gavin which made the man laugh.

"I didn't know you'd miss me that much." Gavin said, making Kalea's cheeks warm up.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know that you're a typical person who likes to exchange messages in such intelligence. I think we both do not like pleasantries through chat because we are not young anymore. I think, it's not the era of approach with capital type doang, so I can only take the time to meet you directly like today. I was wrong, right?"

"I wouldn't know you had such intentions if there wasn't communication, Gavin."

"I also don't know if you're waiting for my message, Kalea. You never told me, and never tried to call me first."

Kalea fell silent. What Gavin said was not entirely wrong. He could have sent Gavin a message first so that the man knew Kalea wanted a more intense interaction between them. But, the problem was, Kalea didn't feel they were that close to getting her to send the message first. He was afraid Gavin would think he was being too aggressive.

"If you think I'm going to be uncomfortable and start thinking badly of you if you call me first, then you can get that thought out of your head right now. I like people who dare to be honest with their feelings. I am not sensitive, Kalea. So I won't know what you want if you just shut up."

"From now on, however you wish, contact me as you please. I will definitely take the time to reply to all your messages. Besides, I'm sure you know when the time is right to send me a message, right?"

Kalea was already speechless as Gavin finished his sentence. He could only silently watch as the corners of Gavin's lips lifted upward forming a soothing, warm smile. The fret that had been holding his heart for so many days was slowly coming to a halt. From the look of Gavin's eyes at this time, Kalea as if invited to dive deeper, drown and then disappear.