Linger

Drafts

"Tonight we're going, okay?"

Kalea emerged from the kitchen door, carrying a plate of fried rice and a glass of water. He walked over to Gavin who was sitting alone in the backyard, enjoying the breeze that hit his large body with a cigarette that had stayed half.

Kalea couldn't help but smile as Gavin immediately gave her a cigarette as soon as he heard her voice. The distance was even still far away, but the man had already moved furiously shaking his hands to expel the smoke that was flying around his body.

The night was not too late, only at half-eight. Karel had just returned home to take a shower and promised to come back again to accompany him to chat in an hour or two. While waiting for Karel to return, Kalea thought it would not hurt to feed this big baby for her restful sleep later. Since leaving the dinner table with a lot of fried rice left over this afternoon, Gavin has not put any food in his mouth other than the apple he brought.

"Why?" asked Gavin after making sure there was no more smoke that Kalea could breathe . When he turned his head, Kalea was already beside him, taking a sitting position after putting the fried rice and water on the table.

"I still miss Mama." Kalea.

For a moment, Gavin was silent. Actually it does not matter if Kalea still wants to let go of longing with her mother. It's just that Gavin doesn't like Kalea lingering here because there's Karel's shucks. Since the kimchi fried rice incident this afternoon, the rancid boy had been searching for her. When he was about to leave for the airport, for example, Karel deliberately dragged Kalea to sit on the back passenger bench even though Gavin had opened the door so that Kalea sat in the front passenger seat so that she could accompany him to chat during the trip.

Not only on the way to the airport, Gavin was also upset by Karel because the man stole a seat next to him on the way home. The reason is so that Kalea can chat with Mama and Papa, even though Gavin knows that Karel actually only intends to make her upset.

If you think Karel's doing just got there, you're wrong. Even when Kalea's parents arrived home, Karel still acted. The man deliberately invited Kalea to chat a lot about the girl's favorite girlfriends until Kalea unconsciously ignored Gavin again.

Anyway, Gavin was really upset with Karel today.

"Gavin?"

"Jude." After cradling for a while, Gavin finally resigned. What if he said no, Kalea will undo the intention to stay the night? Gavin doesn't feel.

"That dong answered."

Gavin breathed a heavy sigh. "If I said no, you wouldn't be able to do it?" he asked while glancing towards Kalea.

Unexpectedly, Kalea nodded her head. "If you say you can't, we don't go crazy."

"Why?" gavin asked confusedly.

"Kok why, anyway? Because you don't approve." Kalea answered casually. Then, he grabbed the fried rice plate from the table and started scooping it. "Open his mouth." His orders while thrusting a spoonful of fried rice into the front of Gavin's mouth.

Instead of opening his mouth, Gavin asked, "Yes, why is that? Why do I have to have my permission?"

The spoon that had been lifted up high had to be lowered back down. Kalea looked at Gavin for a bit, exhaling softly as the man beside her followed her seriously. "So mama said, what should the husband say. To make her life safe, peaceful and happy." There was a smile at the end of that sentence, which made Gavin instantly speechless.

During life, have you ever felt your whole body feel frozen so that none of its parts could be moved? If so, that's what Gavin is feeling right now. After the sentence was ejected from Kalea's lips, Gavin found himself completely out of power. There was nothing he could do but nailed the gaze to the woman beside him.

Along with that question that started to resonate loudly in the head, Gavin opened his mouth. Receiving the mouthful that Kalea offered and chewing the rice grains in slow motion. But even though he had chewed dozens of times, the rice grains were as if they were not crushed and difficult to swallow.

My God, I have sinned a lot against this woman.

...****************...

The clock shows one o'clock past fifteen in the morning. Supposedly, Gavin was asleep, following Kalea who had already fallen asleep after being satisfied to look at the photos of favorite girlfriends. But for tens of minutes Gavin lay down, he could not close his eyes.

This time, his focus was no longer seized by the question of where Irina and Taruna had gone. Because he'll find out about it tomorrow. Now, Gavin is busy thinking about Kalea. About how the fate of their marriage if one day, the carcass that he kept tight began to emit a pungent odor. From a scale of one to ten, Gavin was unsure that it was likely that Kalea would still be able to accept herself being able to reach at least number one.

Sure oes. Which woman will survive a man full of lies like himself? Even Irina who already knew all the rot she had and was getting used to it had now gradually spread the distance.

"I'm sorry, Kal." His whisper to Kalea. He saw the peaceful face of Kalea who fell asleep beside him. Dive into every feature on the woman's face. Admire it as if it were the most perfect sculpture God ever created in human form.

Then, his hand stretched out. He rubbed his marble cheeks slowly which made him intoxicated whenever a red tinge appeared there. This cheek should be owned by a man better than himself. And so is this red lip. Kalea should have given her first kiss to a good man who wouldn't hurt her. But he had already unknowingly stolen that precious first kiss.

"You're supposed to marry a man who's much better than me." Gavin felt that he had put a lot of energy into saying that sentence. But in reality, what came out was just a voice that was almost like a whisper.

"I'm sorry, Kal." He shrieked once more, before he clung Kalea's body into the arms with his increasingly disarranged feelings.

Suppose that. Let's go on once more. If Gavin had not been born out of chaos, would he have been able to grasp this small body before him freely, without the guilt that kept shackling his soul? If Gavin was an ordinary person, who was not from a distinguished family and he did not have to fight to maintain his position in the family, would he be able to live happily with Kalea?

Seriate

.

.

.

.

.

To be honest, this part is the least dapet feel. 😔😔