Small Stars For Faila
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“Faila’’ you have to go through everything” said Tari cheering me on,

“Sorry my body is still weak” I refused the invitation of Dance thanks to the help of paper and one pen, to facilitate our communication, and,

“Baik’’ I will take care of you I also do not need to go to college today” Tari offers helpnaya

“No need for me to be alone here, I don't want to be a burden on other people's lives anymore,

Want to feel far from people who know me, know a Faila about her life story that is a lot of complex.

Missing life without anyone knowing my past, I want to live without anyone noticing that a woman is afraid of many things

“Alright Fai, I will come directly if the eyes of the lecture is finished,” said Tari with a face full of worry, he said,

“Hmmmm,” I nodded.

I still lay my body on the bed, I felt quiet, I felt lonely, but for some reason, from the many problems that plagued me.

Just this time I missed both my parents, all this time I was too busy hating them, to forget to be grateful,

I miss my mom and dad, maybe the train is still there this morning, the Jakarta-Malang Department where my parents are buried.

Malang City of my birth as well as the early city of my suffering

I decided to go to my parents' graves,

my fault may have been all this time, always hating and blaming my parents,

But this time I want to try to understand my mother's way of thinking, destiny and death are God's secrets, man may plan but God decides.

I want to go to the tomb of my parents.Decide by train, to take me to my hometown.

I desperately traveled alone to fight my fears with resignation,

accept whatever happens later

It is undeniable, as long as the journey of grief enveloped my soul, passed through the rice fields, reminding me of my childhood,

The tears flowed like a small river drenched my cheeks, my gaze had not yet turned from that small window, not even realizing that maybe the people in the carriage might have looked at me with big, big eyes,

Seeing a woman starting from entering the carriage carriage already showed sadness, crying without a sound. I was afraid to look at my side, maybe I saw me crying all the way, I only saw the seat that faced me two people who were sturdy complete with a uniform smeared of their nation's servants, I just saw the seat that faced me,

Giving me a smile, my appearance is no longer the one like the village Faila, now I can take care of the body does not intend to boast, I was in the category of male idol women, Sweet and beautiful.

Not replying to a handsome man, I'm afraid that he will invite me to communicate or just get acquainted, it's a shame for me, because until now my voice has not returned or maybe it will not recover again, Making my life later more complete suffering, Can't talk just think about it makes me Prustrated, he said,

Do not want to be invited to chat or get acquainted like young people who have just met.

I took a leaning position and closed my eyes, that way, no one else wanted to invite me to speak,

But sure enough ‘Nasip well can not be achieved and bad luck can not be rejected’ both must be accepted and lived. That's what happened to me, maybe because it's been a long time not coming home to my hometown for years ,

I forgot the station where I had to go down, in a panic

Ashamed to ask then stray on the road, I also remember the old saying, do not want to get lost dare to try to ask the train officer, but dear bigung how to communicate, he said,

The two young soldiers were just watching me, a little guarding the gensi because it had already caught both, then decided not to ask them.

I took the paper pointing at sappam.

“Not wrong mba “ said the clerk, who saw me a little pity,

Maybe in his heart .Beautiful –beautiful mute, maybe that's what the officer thought with his counterpart who was eager to see me,

Although my mind refuses to be pitied , but how ‘ seems to have to accept it,

I sat back down to the chair I was sitting in, the two cogans were still in a watchful manner,

Substantial. What's wrong anyway, I snuggled in annoyance with a look of cynical eyes looking at the young soldier's fault.

Maybe it was my fault earlier, why should I be indifferent to those two young men who ended up like this.

“We are here mba as community service is ready at any time if needed” said one of them from the name yag attached to his chest like his name Rio wardana and another from the beginning the attitude looks different with a friend who is more friendly.

But one of those soldiers seemed to be very cold and stiff and I really disliked such a man,

Cold and stiff the type of man I was avoiding, the cold guy was his name, Felix S he didn't talk much and just focused on the book he was reading,

Well this time let me reply with a smile.

The train finally arrived at Kota Baru Malang station, but I forgot the officer said, New town what old town, when the crete stopped, I bigung did I go down?

I looked dumbfounded, and ashamed to see the two men in Army uniform. My brain always sucks at remembering.

Seeing those two Soldiers go down I also went down, but I looked so stupid for not knowing which way to go.

“Si neng go where exactly?” Named Rio asked.

His gaze was cold and flat, not so sculpted, making weak women like me would retreat in fear of seeing his dingy eyes.

But for the appearance and posture do not ask, his face a little bulean kebule with his skin white, with pruning Hair as good as the army, with the right hair,

His posture reflects his firm and indifferent disposition

“Come,” said Felix elbowed his friend, seemingly not liking my stupid nature.

“Eh”

With the movement of the hand, wait for me to try to throw away the useless gensi, maybe it is better to ask this soldier for help than to be confused myself, and wrong people.

My hand pulled the edge of a shirt called Rio, that's why I stopped it, seeing my hand pull the sleeve of his friend's shirt making Felix's forehead wrinkled, full of Tanya's mark, and looking even sharper.

“Oh yes ampu don't look at me like that young man.

“Iya.Rio also still with the position of the shirt sleeves I hold and remove the paper and pen, using my destination address, and,

Looking at me like that the two handsome young men just looked at each other,

“Can't you talk?” Rio asked heart

I nodded slowly.

“Oh my goodness I don't know sorry” Rio attention but not with Felix his eyes are still with my probing attitude.

OH.look at Felix's Handsome gaze this time

Makes me, a little groggy, have you ever met a handsome guy but treated you guys instead

Like someone who deserves to be saved.

"My name is Rio , and this is my friend Felix “ Rio kindly extended his hand.

Introducing herself and her theme, Rio seemed friendly.

Like the communication for the tuna talk, it confused me

Because they don't understand,

Seeing his lips komat-Kamit without a sound, like a shaman again

Read the mantra, with the help of moving his hand cunningly,

Maybe that type of communication might be Rio's master, though,

"Sorry' speak I can hear it”

I wrote in the paper again, he doubted the troublesome way of communication

Indeed indeed.

Rio, a little doubtful, his thick brows were slightly tilted

"I mean I'm talking normally you can hear it”

"Yya” I nodded

"Means I'm talking normally and you're answering with the words?”

Rio asked again with a smiley face, between feeling

Great, because I can hear

I don't know if he's laughing at my flaws.

Oh, if that's the meaning of that smile, stop laughing

my affliction is handsome guy, I'm monologuing.

It seems like Rio understood, looking at me with a gloomy face,

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Small Stars For FailaWanted Pilgrimage

Small Stars For Faila
Wanted Pilgrimage