Holy Prison

PS 57 - Best Street

"Honestly, Nin. I just don't want Gus Faiz dapetin lo easily. For me, it is too valuable to him. Stupid Bang Ilham chose him" said Aaron.

"Enough, Ron. I want to go home." I said. My head's pulsing.

I really don't want to talk about family and Gus Faiz. I glanced at the silver bracelet in my hand. This bracelet is still so precious to me. Because it was given by Inspiration.

"Why? Lo sick?" ask Aaron.

I shook my head.

"Lo don't want to go around first?" ask Aaron.

"We're traveling around. This place is really good. I like it." I said.

Aaron looked to the right and to the left. Like looking for something. After he found nothing. He followed my request to go home.

We started to get out of this tourist spot. After that we headed to the Trans Jogja stop to return to our home. Ilham rental house is quite minimalist with two rooms, one kitchen, one bathroom, and one living room.

As I walked, I looked back.

"Anne!" scream someone.

I'm stopping. My body stiffens. This voice belongs to Gus Faiz. But this time I switched Gus Faiz's voice. I know that this is just my hallucination.

"Nih, lo card. I want to top up first. I'll wait in the dalem." said Aaron.

"OK." I said.

Aaron looks very agile. Just a few seconds goodbye. He's gone and left me even out of my sight.

"Anne!" gus Faiz's voice again.

Aaron didn't hear that sound. It means I'm just back hallucinating.

I also continued walking. There was nothing after I walked. I was convinced that I was just hallucinating

Suddenly someone blocked my hand. Just when I put the card. That guy pulled me until I was pulled back. Stay away from where the incoming card is attached.

My body stiffens. I'm shaking. I'm sure I'm hallucinating.

"Come, go home, An." he said.

It's not a hallucination.

Knowing that his existence was not a hallucination, I began to thrash. Requesting release.

"Please!" I said.

"No" said Gus Faiz.

I looked at his tired face. "Gue please.” I said.

I circled my gaze behind Gus Faiz. Gus Faiz definitely did not come alone. And sure enough back there I saw Mama, Papa, Ulfa, Umi, and Abah running towards us.

“Why don't you understand too, Gus? Release luee!” my yelling. "Gue beg Gus, I beg you!" I said.

"No, An, I won't let you go anymore" said Gus Faiz. "Look, there's your family. We go home." said Gus Faiz.

I turned my eyes back to my parents. In my heart I miss them so much. I began to guess whether their arrival was because they were really looking for me or just because they did not want to damage their image in front of Umi and Abah.

Mama, Mommy.. Nindy Longs. -Batinku.

When I looked at Papa's face. I see hatred in Papa's eyes. Those eyes are very real.

I am afraid, O God.

Instantly I remembered Aaron who was already inside the stop. When I heard the sound of the Trans Jogja bus coming I realized that I had to leave.

I hurriedly let go and ran towards the busway entrance. Almost there. But when I stick the card. Gus Faiz hugged me from behind. Until we fell backwards in the position of him protecting my head with his hands. He stood up immediately. And help me stand up.

"An, look at me. Look at your parents. We love you." said Gus Faiz, had not yet finished the sentence.

“Basic brat!” Papa suddenly came. And one slap landed on my cheek. The feeling of this slap did not change much, even more painful.

“Om.” Gus Faiz stood before me. He was like my shield. He looks angry at Papa. Be that as it may.

"If slapped like this is a form of affection, Gus. By Allah, I will not grieve it." I said in his ear. Gus Faiz looked at me.

"Your father is just an emotion" said Gus Faiz.

"Lo's even still a baby, Papa." I said. Frustrating. Looks like Gus Faiz doesn't really understand my feelings.

I tried to take a breath of self-soothing because my heart was as sick as it was but I tried to not produce results, instead I cried more and more. My cheeks hurt but my heart hurt more. It hurt so much I felt like I wanted to die.

"Om, this is not how to solve the problem" said Gus Faiz.

He kept holding my hand telling me to keep standing behind me.

"Find him, Son Faiz. He's a kid who doesn't know he's lucky. His work only embarrassed my family!" said Papa.

"No, Om. Om is wrong to think that he is a child who does not know is lucky and makes the Om family ashamed" said Gus Faiz.

"You know nothing. All his life, he was just a brash kid who always humiliated my family! Get her! I'll teach him a lesson!" scream Papa.

Telak. It hurts so much, God. My tears are hard again.

I also let go of Gus Faiz's hand. I approached the man I've been calling Papa. It hurts to hear all the words coming out of Papa's mouth.

"I don't know what my fault is. However, now I know being born as your child was a big mistake in my life" I said.

So tight.

I'm approaching Papa. Looking at the eyes of the hateful Papa looking at me.

Papa raised his hand again to cross my side. However, Gus Faiz hurriedly held Papa's hand. Gus Faiz let go of the check on me.

"Why am I being sought?" I said, looking at Papa's hand.

I looked up holding back my tears from flooding, but still it was even more intense.

I glanced at Mama and Sister Ulfa, they were just crying. Unable to hold Papa.

"Based on a brat!" Papa swung his hand.

"Papa, already!" yell Mama.

This time Papa's hand was held. Not by Gus Faiz. Except by Abah.

"Enough, Lukman!" exclaim Abah.

I looked at Abah. I am so ashamed of Abah and Umi. I think I really want to go. Go forever. In order not to be troublesome or branded as a child less lucky again.

"If you want love and happiness is a mistake that makes your family ashamed. Please allow me to reward the happiness of your family with my absence" I said.

I also ran towards the car that was speeding. It's the only way to stop everything. Stop the pain that was stabbing me. I can't stand it anymore. I'm ashamed of Gus Faiz, I'm ashamed of Umi, especially I'm ashamed of Abah. I'm sick to see Papa, I'm sad to see Mama, and I hate to see Ulfa's house.

I keep running

"Ann!" yelled Gus Faiz. He chased me. I'm tightening my lashes.

Another bit.

"Goodbye, Gus." I said.

TINNNN!

BRUG!

"MAZO!!!" shouted Gus Faiz hysterically.

One car hit me. I feel my body being twisted. And someone hugged me. I smile. Maybe this is the best for everything.

"An. Anin!" Gus Faiz hugged me. "Hold me please" said Gus Faiz.

"Pardon me." I said with great difficulty.

My view is getting blurry. I can't see anything clearly anymore. And the last thing I remember was Gus Faiz crying hugging me, holding my body back from being stuck in the street. And it's all really dark now.

Could this be the best way?