Holy Prison

PS 56 - Garden Lantern

Tonight Aaron takes me to Lantern Park or Rainbow Garden. One of the tourist attractions in Jogja that I most want to visit. In the past, I have expressed this desire to Ilham. I don't know if Aaron ever told Inspiration about this.

While I was walking through this park. I saw a couple who came with their two daughters. They look very happy together. The brother took the sister to the fish pond to see the fish together. After arriving at the edge of the fish pond, the sister pointed to a fish food seller, knowing what the sister wanted, the brother immediately asked his parents for money and bought fish food. Finally they fed the fish in the pond together.

"Miss?" call Aaron.

"Why?" my many. My eyes still follow that happy family. I saw the couple smiling at the behavior of their children.

In my heart I am very envious. Even my heart is beginning to wander.

"Are you happy to go with me?" ask Aaron.

I looked towards Aaron. "Why are you so?" my many.

"Gakpapa, I just want to know" said Aaron.

I don't have an answer to Aaron's question. I really don't know how I feel. Looking at that family, I honestly miss my family. But every time I remembered Mama, Papa and Kak Ulfa, my heart continued to throb.

Again I feel I can't let Aaron down. I answered Aaron's question with a smile.

"Lo miss your family huh?" ask Aaron.

"No. Not at all, Ron. My family says it's a taboo in my life." I said.

Aaron told me to sit on the park bench. Next to the large crocodile-shaped lantern. He sits beside me.

"I'm honest with you, Nin" said Aaron. "Don't lie to me just because I'm Bang Ilham's sister." continued Aaron.

I began to worry about how I should behave. If I lied, Aaron would be sad to know that I lied. But if I say frankly I don't want to add to his life and I'm afraid there's a part that's making him sick.

"Gue doesn't want to be next to you as the shadow of Bang Ilham, Nin. Do you know how to be someone else's shadow? So please be honest with me. Try to see me as Aaron not as Bang Ilham's brother. Can you?" ask Aaron.

I know what it's like to be someone else's shadow. I must have made Aaron very uncomfortable. I have to apologize to him. However he seems right, he is right because ever since I knew he was the younger brother of Inspiration, I kept looking at him as the younger brother of Inspiration, never once did I consider him an Aaron.

"I'm sorry, Ron." I said.

"Gakpa. From now on you'll be honest with me." said Aaron.

I spread my eyes forward. Then suddenly I found someone very similar to Gus Faiz. I'm standing too. Run away. I pulled the hand of Inspiration. But he told me to sit back.

"G-Gus Faiz!" myrag.

"Where?" ask Aaron.

I pointed at someone who was a few meters away from me. Someone who wears a grey shirt. Aaron was disappointed. His eyes were filled with sadness.

"Lo take good care. If that guy wears a gray shirt that you call Gus Faiz, he's not Gus Faiz!" said Aaron.

I rubbed my face too. Closing my eyes and opening them again. And true said Aaron. He's not Gus Faiz. What's wrong with me really?

"Sorry. I was wrong." I said.

Aaron smiled meaningfully.

"Where have you been?" I said.

"Lo's family" said Aaron.

"Does this have anything to do with you not coming to the hospital?" ask Aaron.

I'm nodding. "I want to go to the hospital. Only I was locked in the same room bokap nyokap let me not go anywhere. I was clear that I wanted to go to the hospital because my best friend was in an accident and critical. But they said I was lying. He said I just made up a story so I could play with my friends who are not real. They always thought I was an unbelievable kid. And Brother Ulfa who I mintain please to talk to Mama and Papa also do not want to interfere. Brother Ulfa, I was locked up all day in my room, alone. My room doesn't have a window, so I can't go through the window." I said.

I went back to remembering that incident. Aaron patted my shoulder. Trying to calm me down.

"Honestly, I hate the same thing you used to because you didn't come to the hospital. But every time you look at your face, my hate always disappears" said Aaron.

I looked towards him. "After I'm Ilham's brother who entered the boarding school is only his sister. Why are you there too?" my many.

"Gue entered the pesantren after Bang Ilham died. My parents asked me to take care of my brother first as long as my brother is still in boarding school" said Aaron.

"I'm sorry, Ron. Because I'm disappointed you parents because I tried to run away and can no longer take care of your sister." I said.

"Lo is not wrong. This is my decision. So, I hope you don't beat yourself up" Aaron said.

"Do you know, Ron? If I ever asked the same Inspiration to be taken to this Lantern Park?" my many.

"Gue tau's. Almost everything about you I know, Nin. Besides because of my brother Bang Ilham, he always I deceive to make a story all about lo. Honestly, I've loved it from the first time you came to my house" said Aaron.

"Don't we only meet once?" my many.

"Yes, I met him at all. But I have always tried many times. That's sad, isn't it? Haha." he said laughing bitterly.

I shifted the topic of her feelings by taking her around again.

"Gus Faiz!" I looked at the man who was walking towards me.

I pointed my face at Aaron. She shook her head. Indicates that the person I saw wasn't Gus Faiz.

"Why, Ron?" my many.

"What?" Aaron answered my question with another question. Really sucks.

"Why has his face never disappeared from my head?" I said honestly.

"Because your heart expects him to come with your nyamperin" said Aaron.

Aaron's statement really stabbed me. It's not an answer like this that I want to hear.

"Ron, don't talk about it. I'm your boyfriend now, right?" I said.

"From today I am free from our courtship status" he said.

"Why?" my many.

"The longer the same path, the more I know that your heart may not have. Even a year, a month, a day, an hour, even a second. For now or for the coming. Your heart belongs to only one person, Gus Faiz" said Aaron.

"Aaron, don't joke!" myrag.

"Try asking your heart, who is joking" he said.

"Gue I'll, Ron. If I haven't been able to move on from Gus Faiz. But not you yourself who say that you can teach me slowly for love and love equally lo? Don't do this, Ron. I beg you." I said to Aaron.