I'm Not Him

145

Bondan came to Miss Vera's house. Adit held him on the front porch.

"I beg Adit, I really want to meet Rania" said Bondan.

Adit can only look at him, his mother is already very angry and asks him to prevent Bondan or Yudi who wants to come to see Rania.

"I saranin brother Bondan go home first, wait until mom is not angry anymore, because mom says, if you guys make me bother brother Rania. I'll take him away from Jakarta. And you won't be able to find it" Adit explained after he couldn't bear to see her despair.

"But Dit, why? Let me talk to Mom, tell mom I'll talk to her for a second"

Bondan insisted, he was eager to convince Vera's mom to trust him.

"No, Brother, now Bondan's brother just come home, I will tell you anything" Adit promised.

Because Bondan is the only one she has given permission to be her sister, Rania.

"Promise please let me know, I really hope to see Rania again" said Bondan.

Wherever goes.

###

Dila was neat and about to get out.

"Where are you going?" ask Vero who is sitting in the middle room.

Dila was silent and sighed, not expecting her brother to be overprotiv like this.

"I want to meet Yudi and convince her that she doesn't have to think about Rania anymore. Wh why? Can't"

Dila was upset and said it deliberately provoked Vero's emotions. But Vero did not answer, he stood up and approached Dila and then pulled her back into the room.

"Yawkk! What the fuck, brother? Brother Vero is overdue. I'm not a prisoner, I'm a free man, I go wherever I want, I have rights..."

Dila continued to talk, but Vero remained silent and locked his room. Arumi looked at her husband's drastically changed attitude. He was very sad and felt unable if he had to continue.

Vero sat back down and called his manager to discuss work.

"Yes, maybe one or two more days, I'll just go in and get everything done to the office" said Vero.

Arumi came and put down her favorite glass of green tea. Vero doesn't care. Arumi stood waiting for Vero to work. He wished Vero had told him to sit down or just say hello to him. However Vero was very indifferent, he was colder than usual. Arumi went and went into her room.

Vero went into the room and was about to take a shower, Arumi gave him a towel. But he took another towel that was in the closet. Arumi felt increasingly ignored. Vero goes into the bathroom and Arumi just sits on the bed waiting for him.

After finishing the bath, Vero lay down and went straight to sleep without caring about his wife. Arumi cried, she felt all her fears come true. Vero no longer cares about her because of her brother Yudi's fault.

###

Yudi comes to Rania's house secretly. He saw Rania sitting outside with Vera, talking about something. Sometimes Vera rubbed Rania's stomach and spoke and smiled. Rania just smiled and spoke even though she answered a little.

Yudi sighed, he was eager to talk to them. But his courage was only as big as a green bean seed. Dare and ashamed of his own actions. Yudi left, he decided to go to the bar and drink again to relieve his stress.

Then he returned to Bu Vera's house and shouted Rania's name.

"ROMANIA...RANIA..!"'S CHAT...!"

Yudi staggered while panting as she walked from the bar to Rania's house.

"Lepaaass, I want to see Rania. RANIAA!"

Shortly thereafter Rania came out accompanied by Bu Vera. He looked at Yudi with pity. But Miss Vera showed a dislike of seeing Yudi, especially when she was drunk.

"Rania..I.m.mau touch your belly, just for a moment! Sebentaaaar.match!" yudi said while fusing his two palms together.

Everyone was shocked by Yudi's wishes. They looked at Rania who did not take her eyes off Yudi's face.

Rania let go of her mother's hand slowly, Miss Vera didn't want to.

"No Nia, you can't take her. He's drunk again dear" said Ms. Vera.

Rania looked at her mother.

"But if I don't love her, she will make people annoyed ma'am" replied Rania slowly.

Bu Vera sighed, she could not deny that perhaps Rania's words had a point. He releases but codes Nurdin to look after him.

Rania walked slowly. Nurdin released Yudi slowly. Yudi walked over like Rania who was starting to get closer to him. When they faced each other, Yudi looked at the stomach of Rania who was pregnant with her 3-week-old child. Yudi smiled then slowly brought his hand closer.

Yudi touched Rania's stomach. He rubbed it and then cried.

"What are you gonna do to him? Are you gonna take care of him? Or...."

"I don't know" answered Rania.

Yudi did not dare to look him in the eyes even though he wanted to stare to ask why he answered like that.

"Why?" tanya Yudi still looked down and looked at Rania's stomach.

"I can't think Jud, I don't even know what to think. Maybe you can tell me what to do" Rania said.

Rania feels Yudi is still the only person she can trust after waking up from the accident. He could not even hear anything other than what Yudi was saying. As if it were a joke for him. Rania even seemed to lose something that became her habit after being separated from Yudi.

"A few months ago you called me Dila, now in a day you turn to call me Rania. Loudly and hysterically wanting to see me, Rania. I don't understand Jud, I can't even remember anything. Sick Jud, I could have hurt people who love me so much because of my disbelief. What am I supposed to do? Where should I stay? Who am I really? Dila? Or Rania?" Rania shed her tears.

Yudi wanted to erase it, but he did not dare. Afraid the others held him back and pulled him out of there before he finished talking.

"I'm sorry, I've done all this to you. I also don't know what to do, just come here I have to drink first to gather my courage. But Rania, look, when we were together, I already knew that you were Rania, not Dila. But I didn't tell everyone. I fear losing you again, I feel like I will die if I have to let go of you who are already in front of me. I love you Rania"

Everyone was shocked by Yudi's confession. Including Bondan who also came and saw the moment. They did not expect Yudi to hide Rania's identity just for his own sake.

Suddenly Adit who had just woken up, immediately approached Rania and was about to pull her hand to bring her into the house.

"Come, brother, come in. Don't give him a chance to make your sister confused again" said Adit.

But Rania was still not moving. Yudi retreated a little to make room for her if she wanted to leave. Rania's eyes turned to Bondan who was standing not far behind Nurdin.

Rania could see the crying coming out of Bondan's eyes. His heart felt very sick, he did not understand, why every look at Bondan's face always felt that way. It felt like hugging Bondan and wiping his tears. But his body could only remain still.

"I'll take care of him myself with my mother and sister. Please, don't you ever come back and make me feel this kind of headache and heartache again. I beg you"

Rania's voice was slow, but it felt like lightning was striking for Bondan. He refused to see her again. His hope of being able to be with her again became an empty despair. Bondan turned and walked away. Rania looked at him while crying, then turned around to hold her sister's hand.

Yudi could only cry looking at Rania who turned to leave her. He felt this was like a punishment to him, for having already made a grave mistake. And he doesn't deserve to get sorry from anyone.