I'm Not a Wild Grass

Papa (Laila POV)

In the end, the series marriage proposal was implemented as well. But not tonight. But on the next morning, at the house of Bu Hajah Mariyah, his mother Nunik.

Why we chose his house, because he himself offered his house as a place of commitment. The goal is for the convenience of the event. My rented house is indeed quite narrow for the sacred procession that became the meeting place of our two families later.

We also ask for help from Mr. Kiyai Imron, the nanny of the ponpes near the compound where I live to act as the guardian of my marriage and Erlan. With only Erlan's nuclear family and me alone bearing witness to our marriage.

And everything happened so suddenly. With simple makeup ordered suddenly too. Also the catering, which, though sudden, has been ordered by Mama Ilmaya from the Five Star hotel.

You know, around ten in the morning, kabul was finally ready to be spoken by the mouth of Erlan and the judge.

Actually, before deciding to use the services of a guardian judge, I had tried first to find my biological Papa's whereabouts. This was one of Nunik's advice to me a long time ago.

Flashback.

"However, you still have a living biological father, il. So she still has the right to determine the continuity of your marriage. No matter how bad his attitude was towards you and Buk De Mutia, it did not take away his rights as a father. So, my advice, try to find your real father first. If indeed you can not find it, then you can use the judge as a substitute. It was also intended to avoid sin," said Nunik at length.

"But I used to have a friend who was married to a judge, but his father was there and was also present at his wedding, Nun," I tried to give an example of my friend's marriage problems.

"May use the judge, with the consent of the biological father, or for other cases such as his friend's female, child results, sorry, out of wedlock. So when he married, then his father did not have the right to marry him to someone else. Even with his nasab also contributed to the mother, not to her father."

"What do you mean, Nun?"

"I mean, when he mentioned the woman's name, he bint her to the mother's name. Not bint to his father's name," said Nunik explained.

"Oo.. that's it. So, I have to try to find my Papa first huh?" I concluded our conversation that afternoon.

"Yes. Gotta."

"Hhhh.."

Flashckback.

For almost a month yesterday, besides being busy preparing for marriage, I was also busy looking for Papa's whereabouts. I started by tracing the last trail Papa was in the fish farm we had.

Darling, I didn't manage to find her whereabouts. Even though I've been looking for all of Papa's colleagues that Mama knows.

Papa seemed to disappear swallowed by the earth, since our separation was many years ago. I also forgot how Papa looked. So when looking for her, I only armed with a piece of old photo when Papa and Mama married in his youth.

In the end, I used the services of a judge to process my Ijab kabul and Erlan's marriage this morning.

But, a shocking incident occurred when my kabul ijab procession was about to begin. Suddenly Mama who had been sitting quietly beside me, shouted in shock with a loud enough voice.

"Papa?!!" Shouted Mama while standing up suddenly.

Suddenly everyone's attention followed the direction of Mama's gaze.

I followed Mama's eyes to the entrance. Where there stood Darman, the little boy who worked at the Erlan family home with his father, the gardener whom I forgot whose name he was.

Then Mama let go of her hand that had grabbed my shoulder, and then walked to the door.

And I looked back at the door, at the two figures that seemed to be flinching in their place. I observed Darman, the boy who once said he was my number one admirer. There was clearly confusion on the little boy's face. He may feel confused because now all the attention is directed towards them.

Next, my eyes shifted to Darman's father.

During my time working at Erlan's house, until I stopped but still visited there often, I hardly ever interacted with the gardener and yard in Erlan's family home.

Either because of his fierce appearance with a thick beard and mustache, and his quiet carriage, which made me keep my distance from the gardener.

"The Ulum?" Mama Ilmaya's voice resuscitated my daydream.

'ah. Yep. Is correct. Darman's father's name is Mang Ulum!' I muttered in a monologue.

My gaze returned to Mang Ulum, who, inexplicably looked towards Mama who was now walking towards him with a glazed look.

Then, Mang Ulum's gaze turned to me. And, my heart was beating fast as well. Because I found a different look than what he usually gave me.

I don't know why my mind seems to recognize that gaze. Once was.

'What is he..?!! Pa..Papa?!' I gasped in shock and just squeezed the strong songket cloth I was wearing.

Ba dump's. Ba dump's.

'Is he really Papa?! Papa whom I have been looking for for a month but have not met?!' my mind is confused by my own assumptions.

I looked carefully at the appearance of the man who was still unmoved in front of the door. He is currently having a conversation with his mother. They spoke in a very slow voice so I could not hear the contents of the conversation.

I saw Mama crying hugging her own body still standing.

Then Mang Ulum grabbed Mama's shoulder to then pull her into his arms.

I jerked. I feel more confident about the truth of my guess.

That simple-looking man is indeed my Papa who used to remember me as handsome. Although I see he is not as brave and handsome as in the photos of his youth that I keep in the album.

I couldn't even find the two figures in common, because the difference was really a contrast between them.

The dozen years that separated us, have changed the appearance of Papa that I so hated, but at the same time I secretly missed.

And finally, without me asking and wanting, two clear crystal circles were creeking down my cheeks right now.

***