LOVE NARA

3.37. I KNOW EVERYTHING

"Can I come in?"

Ardi was still standing in the doorway, waiting for permission from the owner of the room who seemed to be still finishing some files on the table.

"Come in and sit down, Di. Sorry if it made you wait. I need to finish my report first"

Alya still raised her face and looked at Ardi who was already sitting before her with a smile that continued to be etched on her lips. The man's gaze did not even a little turn away from the doctor's face, who then looked down embarrassed and returned to busying himself with the file he had to sign.

That opportunity Ardi used to continue to pay attention to Alya from close range, limited only by the table before them. The widower doctor was content to stare at the graceful face that was still concentrating with the report sheets he examined then spiked his signature.

How could a woman as good as you be able to experience an event that even I myself wouldn't want to imagine, Al? Your hard work from morning to night all day, you can never enjoy it for years. I truly cannot understand why you can live such a inhumane life ....

Ardi felt his chest extremely tight mixed with mounting anger. It felt like he found the man and made a calculation with him. His heart was pounding ever more and more and hunting down, making his face flushed withstanding an almost uncontrollable emotion.

Alya catches the change in Ardi's face, following her tense attitude and looks to hide something. He raised his face and looked back at the man to be sure.

"Ardi, what's wrong with you?" A worried look was seen on Alya's face when she found Ardi who was silent looking at her with teary red eyes.

"Ac ...?" Alya repeated her question because the one being asked still remained silent and only nailed a glance towards her with a deep yet scarred look.

"I should have asked you, Al," replied Ardi, asking the woman who was the center of attention at this time.

"I? What's wrong with me? I'm fine," Alya refuted and tried to act as calm as possible.

He finished the task, then closed the map and pulled it over next to the table. Slowly he took off his proud white coat and attached it to the back of the chair. Ardi still continued to look at him with full of haru.

"You ... Why are you this strong? Why are you this loud? Why did you choose to swallow this bitterness alone and try to heal your own wounds without wanting others to know and help you?"

Questions repeatedly thrown Ardi as an overflow of feelings of sadness, pain and hurt that also felt every remember the patience Alya lived his destiny alone.

Alya began to understand the direction of Ardi's question. Unable to answer, she lowered her head and hid her suddenly warm, reddened face.

But he had just avoided Ardi's bitter gaze, heard by him a stifled sobbing that made him again raise his face. He ventured to look at her and found that the man had already rubbed his face with both palms, in order to erase the trace of crying there.

But again the face was again wet by a few tears dripping from a pair of shades of neutrals that currently look increasingly red and swollen.

"Ardi ... you ...??" Alya's face looked increasingly worried, still not understanding why Ardi could cry like that.

Ardi shook his head slowly then started to catch his breath and calmed down. After feeling her heart strong and ready, she reviewed a smile to start sharing with the woman who looked unsettled and continued to pay attention to her.

"May I share a story with you tonight?" Ardi first asked permission from the graceful woman because she needed time to convey something.

Alya nodded her head just like that and according to when Ardi took her away from her room and looked for another place to talk more freely.

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Ardi returned to the car that both sides of the glass he had opened. He gave one glass of warm drink he had just bought from one of the street vendors lined up neatly along the edge of the city park.

While waiting for their order of fried rice to be delivered to the car, Ardi began his story after sipping a warm drink in his own hands. Alya beside him was ready to listen to what the man of his past wanted to tell him.

"First, after our separation that time, I had experienced painful events for most of the day, for many years."

What does Ardi mean by this painful event? Has he been sick all this time?

"Without any symptoms, I suddenly felt my whole body ache like it had fought and been beaten so many times. My breath often felt tight suddenly and was always frightened for no reason."

Alya was surprised but had yet to realize the direction of the man next to her. He still thinks Ardi is suffering from an unknown illness.

"A few times I checked with a doctor with such symptoms, but the results showed there was not a single disease that I was looking for and no allergy symptoms that I had. Everything is healthy and fine."

Ardi turned towards Alya who was also looking at him full of questions but held him in silence. He returned to telling so that Alya immediately knew where the story was headed.

"I finally decided to ignore my pain, even though it's been going on for almost three years without stopping."

Three years? And that pain? All over the body? Nah! It must have been just a coincidence at the same time.

Alya started to feel her heart flutter. Not because of his feelings for Ardi who started to bloom again. But because he began to guess everything even though he was not completely sure.

"After those three years, I don't know why I feel that kind of pain anymore. But ... At certain times I still continue to feel the pain in my head and the pain and heat in my face, especially on the cheeks. Like being slapped or beaten by someone."

Alya was increasingly convinced by his estimate. His eyes began to poach and water but were still held in the fertilizer.

"Surprisingly, all that pain again just disappeared. My heart was often relieved and happy for no reason, as if apart from the heavy burden that had previously continued to rule and hold me."

Alya started to shed tears on both of her cheeks. He couldn't help it anymore because he already knew what Ardi was talking about.

"And the last I felt was when one afternoon, I suddenly woke up and sat in a fast motion because I felt a tremendous pain in the back of my head. In addition, my body suddenly felt very stiff and very sick. Both my legs became numb and could not move at all."

Almost Alya dropped the drink glass in her hand because she was so surprised when she heard the last story of Ardi. He looked at both of his legs and recalled back to the bad events that had been over a year .

"You know why I can feel all that, Al?" Ardi paused for a while and then locked his gaze on Alya's face that had been teary-eyed.

"It's all because our feelings are always linked to each other. I always feel what you feel despite the distance and time between us."

Alya cried unstoppably again. He did not expect at all, Ardi's feelings were still very strong and tight to him, even though they had been separated for a very long time.

"So from now on, don't lie to me by saying you're okay and don't feel any of that. Because there, while away from you, without me noticing I can still feel what you're going through here. I know what it feels like, what it hurts like. I know everything, Alya."

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