REMORSEFULLY

Kangen

Is it because there's already someone in your heart?" mas Rasya said while looking at me deeply.

I am confused what to answer, but fortunately also this ring I wear, it could be a reason to reject Mas Rasya, my inner self.

"I.iya Mas," I stammered.

Mas Rasya just smiled cynically.

"I know you're Fan, it's not easy for you to fall in love" he said.

"This is proof Mas" I raised my hand and showed the ring in my hand.

"If you can't lie, don't force yourself" said Mas Rasya.

"As for me, believe it or not, obviously for now I really enjoy my solitude, for me Rafa is more than enough for me" I said.

Let whatever I say he keeps forcing me to refer, very stubborn I said in my heart.

" It's late, Should Mas go home, or Mas just spend the night?" he said it was getting weird.

"Nggak Mas, it is not good for a WIDOW to spend the night in the house of a WIDOW, we will be in the residents' quarters" I said, stressing the word widow and widower.

"Our turn is married" he replied.

"Enak in Mas, miserable in me," I answered sniffling as I stood towards the door.

I saw Mas Rasya chuckling as he moved towards the door, before actually coming out and turning towards me

"Before the qobul ijab comes out of the man's mouth, I will still chase after you, ' he said with a faint smile.

'Jeez, it's getting weird, '" I said, getting irritated.

Mas Rasya really makes me wonder, when I became his wife was even in vain, once it was released eh instead back in pursuit. Really weird.

"Look at Mas's hour, it's late, I said .

Mas Rasya passed by to his car, before actually leaving the yard of the house he honked twice, even though I had closed the door.

Yes, that's how Mas Rasya, as if he had a thousand ways to get what he wanted.

...**********...

The days kept changing, Mas Rasya proved what he said, he often visited the house on the grounds of meeting Rafa, sometimes also bring my favorite food. His deathly pleadings to me instead of making me drift or fall asleep. It makes me uncomfortable to hear it.

How many times have I said that don't go home often, instead he doesn't care, I say he considers the wind then.

Sometimes I feel bad about the neighbors who already know we're divorced, they think we have a relationship again.

Rayhan also seemed to swallow the earth, there was no news.

This situation makes me confused to decide what, on the one hand Mas Rasya who always asked for a referral, on the other hand Rayhan who was waiting for an answer from me even had no news until now.

In the thread of my evening prayer I asked God for His choice. Even if there is still a soul mate for me to give the best. The man who loves me because of You is God, the man who will guide me to Your Jannah.

After chanting the do'a unconsciously my lips called out Rayhan's name. Hearts and minds are on him.

"Is this a sign that God has shown me the best?" I said in my heart.

"Bismay this the best O God" I pray in my heart.

...******...

In a three-story house far across, in a third of the night in a spacious room.A man was sitting on his alphabet. Pray to God the owner of love.

He asks if Fani is the soul mate outlined by God for him then bring him closer, if not then keep it away from his heart and mind.

After performing his evening prayers, Rayhan rushes to return to his contest.

But his eyes could not be closed because he thought of a woman who was very in love, who else if not Fani Rahayu.

"Sorry Fan, lately I have not contacted you, I can only pray for you in silence because that will train me to love you sincerely, unconditionally." he said.

The reason Rayhan also did not contact Fani because he wanted to give time for Fani to think and make decisions without feeling any coercion or discomfort in his heart.

Rayhan thinks that if he contacts Fani, there will be a bad feeling for Fani if she rejects him later.

And also if the rejection he got then at least he was used to it because it had been two weeks they rarely had contact even though by phone.

Because Rayhan's eyes are difficult to close, then he took his salary stored on the nightstand. He opened his facebook account and he saw Fani's social media account was online.

Rayhan hesitantly tried to send a message through a messenger.

" Bunga.. haven't slept?"

There is no answer in this app.

Ting ... an incoming message in the WhatsApp app.

Flower. :"I can't sleep.

Beetle :Why?

Flowers.: KK why not sleep too.

Beetle : Not sleepy.

Flowers.: When are you here?

Beetle.: I don't know.

Flower.: Rafa kangen KK

Beetle.: You????

Flower.: : ___________________________________________________

Beetles: What kind of kangen??

Flower.: Kangen is also a Kak & 3.

Beetle.: God willing tomorrow I am

coming up.

Rayhan smiled as she read a message from the woman she loved so much, repeatedly reading the message. Sometimes he kisses the screen. Unceasingly the smile was painted on her lips At least this was a good start for her because Fani said kangen to her.

Rayhan could not close his eyes back, Fani's shadow always danced in the corner of his eye. Want it to feel as soon as morning and soon meet the idol of the heart

He booked the first flight the next day.

After the dawn prayer Rayhan rushed to prepare to fly to the city of the owner of the heart. He only carried a rangsel bag on his shoulder. A smile never leaves his lips.

"Where are you going so early?" ask the mother.

"You went to see Fani, ma'am" he replied.

"Basar bucin," his mother sneered.

The mother had already known for a long time that her son loved Fani. Because in addition to being a mother, for Rayhan his mother is also a friend as well as a place to confide.

The mother did not forbid Rayhan to approach Fani, because the happiness of her child is the main, she did not care even though Fani was a widow. It doesn't matter to him what's important Rayhan is happy.

After breakfast and farewell with his parents, Rayhan rushed to the airport because his flight was only an hour away, even though the distance of his house with the airport only took fifteen minutes. But he couldn't wait to leave immediately.

After waiting for a while he finally boarded the plane. He prayed in his heart that what he hoped would happen. Fani will accept it, about love for him later that is important Fani will accept it first. He can definitely make Fani fall in love with him.

Fani's...My Silent Love .I'm coming.....Wait me honey's....