Trapped in the Love of the Past

Trapped in the Love of the Past

"What the hell are you Nis!"

I stood while pointing at the brown paper on the table.

Inside there is a photo of Azzam measuring 4×6 attached using a paper clip.

Nisa closed her eyes. His body was slightly shaken. Bummer. He didn't expect my reaction to be so extreme.

The woman pulled my arm as I was leaving her.

"Herard of my explanation before Lil."

"Nothing to explain!"

I looked at him sharply.

"Dengerin first, plis."

Nisa memelas's. I saw a clear drop coming from his eyes.

I finally sat back. Unable to see it clear.

"You know what, if I had fainted so many times on the first day of mens?"

I'm nodding.

"Today I ventured to the obstetrician. And he said-"

Nisa tergugu's. Unable to continue his sentence.

I shifted my chair to get closer to him. I put his head in my arms. I cried even though I didn't know what was really going on. For a moment we were dissolved in tears.

"The doctor said I have severe endometriosis, the only way is to lift my uterus so that I don't have any more pain if my period comes."

Nisa's crying broke again in my arms.

Innalillah...

I clenched her body tightly. As a woman, I know what that means. I felt Nisa's heartbeat move so fast. His breathing is irregular. Her crying managed to make my body slightly shaken. I looked around. Some cafe goers seemed to notice me. But let it be, it's their right.

I took off my arms when the sound of crying was no longer heard. Look at him lovingly. Holds his shoulder gently. Now he looks calmer.

"Nisa danger's. Azzam is not what you think. I'm sure he won't divorce you just because you can't have kids."

"Gue knows exactly how he is."

My next. Nisa scrunched her forehead like asking for an explanation from my sentence just now.

"I mean, if you see him as a faithful and responsible husband."

I hurriedly clarified my words so that Nisa would not be suspicious.

"Yes lil.indeed not Mas Azzam who asked for polygamy. It's purely my initiative."

His eyes looked towards the front.

"Gue can't give offspring to him. He deserves to have a child."

"But this is no way. You can adopt an orphan. There's a lot in the parlour."

My murmur.

The woman shook her head.

"Gue had thought carefully. I want Azzam's own blood."

"That's not me."

I refuse firmly.

"You're the one that pantes Lil."

"What are you talking about?"

"Gue knows your nature. From good to ugly."

Said chuckling.

"Among my best friends, you deserve Mas azzam."

The woman tried to convince me.

"Gue don't want to!"

"Mas Azzam was Lil's good guy, very good. He's the man in charge."

Heavy I swallowed saliva.

Ah Nisa, even I know Azzam better than you.

"God willing I'm sincere Lil."

"Elu can say sincerely, willingly and all sorts of things because you haven't experienced Nis. The human heart is always changing.You now speak willingly, but later we do not know. You can.gue.grasa jealous of each other, feel hurt. Destroyed our friendship."

My words are fiery.

I sip the coffee that has cooled.

"It's like it's got to be in a polygamy. I don't want to sacrifice our friendship just for this. I've done it with my brother Nis."

"There are also many examples of happy polygamy. Shouldn't be isikha-"

"There is no isikharoh event!"

My Sergey firmly cut his sentence.

"Did Azzam know about this?"

Nisa nodded.

"What did he say?"

"He refused."

I let out a sigh of relief.

"But I managed to convince him."

Further.

"Oh my God, Nis!"

I growled.

"No need to make Azzam polygamy with me, or with any woman. Just because you can't give offspring to him. Because the purpose of marriage is not just about heredity. There are many couples out there who can be happy even if they have no children. You have to keep the same Azzam."

Nisa was silent looking at me who was firmly speaking.

"We're going home now."

With a little force I asked the woman to stand up from her chair. Then down the road to find an angkot that can take Nisa home.

Then the four-wheeled vehicle came. Nisa immediately went up then waved at me.

I rushed to find the angkot to go to the boarding house. It wasn't until 5 minutes that I was in it.

I leaned my head against the vehicle seat while closed. Observing the sound of a samson song from a car tape that seemed to represent my feelings.

.....................

When it is written for me

Is the best for you

I'll make you a memory

The most beautiful thing in my life

But it won't be easy for me

Leaving traces of your life

Which is immortal engraved

As a beautiful memory

.....................

My chest's tight. Tears washed down the cheeks.

God, I really love that man.

And I confess that I used to pray incessantly that you would unite me with Azzam.

But if I may ask, not in this way.

I don't want to hurt my own best friend.

On the other hand, I will not be able to share.

You have to justify a polygamy.

But I will not be prepared to bear the consequences.

****

[Assalamualaikum Kalila, can we meet?]

I saw a message appear on my watch.

[This who?]

I'll get that message right away.

[Azzam]

The deg!

What did he want to see you. What don't - don't have anything to do with that taaruf proposal.

[I'm busy. Through wa aja]

[Can't be Kalila. We should meet up]

[Where?]

[The cafe where you met Nisa yesterday. Table 9. Maghrib]

[Alright]

I finally decided to meet him. Maybe by meeting we can solve this very complicated problem.

After performing the maghrib prayer I immediately rushed to the cafe that was said to be Azzam. The atmosphere of the cafe is not too crowded, maybe because it is not a weekend. Some people enjoy coffee while chatting with each other. The evergreen song sounds soft making the atmosphere of this cafe feel so shahdu.

I stepped towards table 9 like Azzam said. A "RESERVED" inscription has been attached to the table.

I saw 2 cups of avocado juice and 2 slices of sweet bread with pepper jam. My favorite.

There is a sense of having to sneak into the heart.

Ah that man, still treating me like this.

The man was seen from a distance. I still wear my wear pack and my safety shoes. Looks like he just got home from work. The straight black hair was wet, it seemed like the marks were exposed to the residual water of ablution. I used to love it when I saw it in that condition. It looks more charming.

But now?

Ish never mind, liking him is no use anymore.

"Assalamualaik."

The man cupped both hands in front of his chest.

"Getishalight."

My answer was short without seeing Azzam's face.

"Why is this still intact juice equal to bread?"

Ask.

"What the hell.."

I answered a little sewot.

The man smiled then immediately sat down on the chair. Take off the backpack attached to his back and pull out a yellow map.

"Read!"

The man thrust the thing forward.

"What's this?"

Answer ketus

"Ish.jutek is really the same ex."

Said chuckling.

I whined while taking the map was rough.

There's a name on the front cover.

CV Annisa Salmarani

Seriate.

*CV.curriculum vitae or biodata commonly used when performing taaruf.