Trapped in the Love of the Past
Trapped in the Love of the Past
Eps. 39
Even if it's just a typing, but I'm very happy. Many people like and read my writing. Not many people often comment too. They give sport to what I'm going through.
Because the story I wrote was my story. Without being made and purely my journey of love. If you think it will be very sad. But I tried iklas and made this a life lesson.
A message is sent through the messenger. I noticed the account with a picture of a veiled woman. I open it and read it immediately.
"Assalammualaikum sis, greetings know. I'm Ifa from Bekasi."
"Waalaikumsalam. Greetings, I'm Lisa" I reply to the message by giving emoj a smile.
"Sister's story is very interesting and the writing is also very neat. Why not just write directly in an online novel. That's the result."
"Sorry brother, I'm still a beginner and don't understand about it yet. It was just a fad because I wasn't working so I was bored."
"But the real brother, the story is really interesting. Try my advice, brother, there must be a lot of fans."
"Okay, I'll try later. Thank you so much for your advice."
"Same, good luck, Lisa."
I give emoj love at the end of the reply via messenger. I started thinking for a moment. Maybe my writing will be liked by readers. Even I myself am not sure of all that.
My phone's ringing, call sign coming in. A name appeared on the screen. Mr. Rohman, I immediately picked him up.
[Hallo, ma'am.]
[Non, from earlier I sent an unopened message. Are you busy?]
[Ahh, that.. Sorry, I haven't opened whatsap yet. I was reading a novel.]
[Oh, I think it's busy.]
[No, mas. Oh yeah, what's the matter of the phone call at break time. Have you eaten?]
[Oh, baby. There's something I want to talk about.]
Instantly I was silent, but this chest was beating very fast. I don't know why it feels so good to hear Rohman call me affection. Not usually, and only this time I heard him say a word of affection to me.
[Hallo baby, why shut up. You good rhyme?]
[Ehh, mm yes. I'm sorry I'm not focused. What did I say, I didn't hear.]
[You're why, baby, like you're thinking about something. Are you having any problems?]
[No, I really have nothing. Oh yeah, what did you want to say?]
[It looks like I'll talk later.]
[why is that, mom?]
[Yes, I'll pick you up for dinner tonight.]
[Ehm, so. Yes, yes, all right, mas.]
[I've been payday, non. You need what? Will I give you the money you want to buy whatever.]
[No, I don't need anything. I still have money, too. Money saved for the future.]
[My future is you, baby. No need to ngeyel. At seven I will pick you up. You rest there.]
[Yes, my mom.]
I hung up the phone with Rohman's mas. I remember when I first met him. It turns out we have the same taste. But blocked by someone.
But now time will soon unite us. I can only pray, may he be the last. Remembering the events that have already happened. And I don't want that to happen again either.
Happiness that is in sight, disappears with arrival. Makes life so uninspired. And left a very deep wound. It is the weight of this life that I have experienced.
Even if it's just the past, it hurts too much to remember. Not feeling these eyes dripping a clear circle. Immediately I remembered Jimmy. My first love in the past. When we are the same still sitting in school. Until we parted because of some circumstances.
I wish I had forgotten all those memories. But it always comes to my mind. It's so hard to forget everything. This mind is so tormented.
Had the accident not happened, maybe now we've been sitting in the guarantee. And we live a life together. Waiting for the birth of the baby in my womb. Even though I myself do not understand who the child I bear is whose child.
But yes, I don't want to prolong this. What's in my fiction right now is, facing the Arman family.
I still have to be honest if I'm carrying a baby. But not Rohman's son. I have to tell you the truth. Whether they will accept me or not, being honest is the main thing.
Because Rohman said, he was barren and to have a very small child. So I was bright to his family. I don't want conflict later.
My head was a little dizzy from thinking about suaty things. Then I decided to take a break. Remembering later that night Rohman would pick me up, so I intended to go to sleep.
**********
I was ready, because Rohman was coming to pick me up. I beautify myself with a thin makeup spread.
Not long after a call from Arman entered. I immediately picked it up.
[Hallo, ma'am.]
[Sweetly I'm ahead.]
[Okay, I'll be right out.]
I'm closing the phone. I lock the door to the hostel room and I'll be heading to the front. Rohman was waiting with his motorcycle.
A sweet smile with dimples welcomed my arrival. He immediately put on a helmet and told me to go up.
[What do you want to eat, baby?] Again the word love makes me not wiggle. I don't know what's on my mind.
[Why keep quiet? What do you want to eat?]
[Ehh, um sorry. I'm a little dreamy so I don't hear you.] I had to lie to him.
[You why? Are you sick?]
[Eehh, No mas. I'm fine. Yes, we just walk. It's up to you to eat where. I just follow.]
[You are different from others, dear.]
[What do you mean, mas?]
[Forget it, it doesn't matter. We walk now.]
[Yes.]
[Can I ask for help, baby]
[What do you ask for, ma'am?]
[Will you hug me?]
[Ba alright, mas. I'll do.]
I hugged his body from behind. I felt the warmth that made me comfortable . Your heart and mind are calm.
Rohman propelled his vehicle at moderate speed. The breeze of the night makes me dissolve in daydreams. Arman's hand started to hold my hand.
Deg.'
My heart beats faster. My mind's a little messed up. Moments like this remind me of someone. Suddenly these eyes drip clear furrows.
"Jimmy, I miss you so much. Are you missing you too." I said in my heart.
But I couldn't hold back my tears, it was getting louder. I looked at the dark sky. And I pray in my heart.
"Jimmy, may you calm down there. I will always remember you."
