Like the Fragile Who Tried to Stay Whole

36

In his body that lay limp helpless, empty and so empty the rain fell with a rush. The cold is so noisy in the sound of splashing rain falling on the surface of the earth. Like the sky that seems to know and feel the same pain as Aera.

With Aera and with all the thoughts that are being strived just to survive in a situation that comes back like this, it is not okay.

His eyes still shed tears occasionally. In his efforts to survive his heart continued to crack and crack. Occasionally, it comes back again and again, often and everything happens to be a habit. Something that is left occasionally even makes it destroyed for umpteenth time. Because one decision today will be the determinant of many things in the next time.

Wounds that once exist and are left may look like they are treated by themselves but the truth of the wound that is ignored will aggravate although sometimes not with the form. Neglecting to think this was just a test keeps Aera cheerful and forgetful and lets go of all, he said "Let everything happen in what God determines, let it flow and pass by itself" . Resignation may but do not allow, surviving also requires effort and effort, because every path is not the same.

Already at 02:50, Aera opened the slimut that originally covered her wake and stepped limply just to wash her face.

Aera washed her face, so refreshing the water running down her face. Aera looked at her who looked so pitiful from the mirror image. Her hands were directed, touching the mirror rubbed with her fingers on the mirror reflections depicting a pale, lethargic and so sad face.

Aera took a deep breath and exhaled with her head nodding a few times, agreeing with what her inner decisions and thoughts were.

Aera smiled before leaving to resume her sleep.

With a body that is still felt stiff and eye bags that felt achy Aera woke up to open the curtain and open the window. Bright morning weather after a night of rain, cool and refreshing.

Mba Ana who entered noticed Aera who was enjoying the morning by occasionally closing her eyes between the light that hit her.

Aera turned her head after realizing that someone was watching her.

"Magi mba"

Sapa Aera smiled with a light that this time filled Aera's face.

"For Aera"

Reply mba Ana smiled with some feeling and things that stuck uncomfortable, thinking a lot about Aera.

"Tumben on Sunday you're up at this hour, there's an event?"

With mba Ana approaching Aera.

Aera smiled at his nodding.

"Mm, Aera wants to go out there's an appointment"

"Where? Mm? All right, right?"

There was a faint smile on Ana's face with a sad look at Aera, and a not-so-subtle hand rubbing Aera's cheek.

Aera widened her smile, touching Ana's hand which was currently on the surface of her cheek.

"As long as there is mba why Aera is not good enough"

Mba Ana takes her hand off Aera's cheek and carries Aera's hand, which she originally touched to be in her hands.

"Aera hurt would be so for mba, and instead, Aera is good, happy mba would feel the same. So do not feel alone yes invite mba to be and participate in the likes and sorrows for Aera"

Aera's smile faded with her listening word for word that Ana spoke like she was the tenth in the chest, making Aera this time look at mba Ana seriously and with her glazed look. Aera releases her hand from Ana's grasp and hugs Ana tightly.

" Mba does know well what to calm and comfort Aera"

Aera smiled in an embrace that poured down her tears.

"Never be lost mba, keep Aera"

Aera continued to make her embrace tighter.

After a while the two similarly let go of his embrace.

The same smile pays attention to each other, by removing traces of tears.

"Before going to breakfast first yes, mba make breakfast for you"

Aera smiled at his nodding.

"It's right to go down, you're ready"

Aera hurriedly prepared with always beautiful in her looks. This time it was so enchanting, a denim skirt with a length that exceeded the knee with a white shirt inserted inside her, her hair in a bun on top.

Aera came down with a brown envelope containing the form that Mama gave her last night.

Seen Aera mama who was enjoying her breakfast.

Aera stopped her steps right behind mama, her steps becoming so heavy after recalling her thoughts, hesitating.

Aera closed her eyes for a moment, stroking a determined sigh.

Aera stepped back towards the dining table.

"Ma's Side"

Sapa Aera smiled, already in front of mama.

"Bagi"

Mama who looked at Aera with a serious look and looked like there was someone in her custody.

"Aera has decided"

Aera placed the brown envelope she was carrying right in front of her mom.

Mama stared at the envelope Aera had placed before turning her gaze to Aera, waiting with what Aera next said.

"Sorry ma, but Aera really can't. There are times when a child feels grown up and they will say, this is my life and I will decide how and how anything. It's Aera's decision right mama with what kind of mama will decide her, Aera stick with Aera's decision"

Aera this time seriously.

"It's Aera saying goodbye, Aera has a promise outside. Mama eat a lot and do not let too many things tiring thinking mama"

Aera quietly took a slow breath before turning around to leave mama.

When he turned around, he saw Ana who was approaching the dining table with a glass of milk that had been made.

"Sorry yes mba Aera did not have breakfast at home already late about it"

Aera smilingly looked at Ana.

Aera passed away leaving her mother stunned and with Ana preparing breakfast.

The unanimous decision Aera had made in her musings last night. Aera has to go through, face up to what Aera really wants. Aera won't let her, won't. Whatever happens next Aera must be able to decide her, however this is her life, Aera herself who knows correctly with what her needs are.

This time Aera had to step a little bit away just enjoying her decision, although it would disappoint mama.