A DEEP WOUND

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"Crazy for you! your home is far away! tomorrow if you tell me to come here again I won't mauk."

 

Salsa has just arrived. He started nagging after entering my room.

 

"Your room is hot. No AC what?" Salsa removed the hijab that had been attached to her head.

"Eh. Don't be weird. Where there is AC here. Thank goodness there was a fan." I then pointed the fan that was already on to Salsa. "I asked you to sit in front. You also must have been hot. But it's you who don't want to."

"yeah. Cook I have to open the hijab outside. You thought to yourself, "the way Salsa answered made me even more upset.

"You are yes. Say this you answer this. Say that you answer that. Your late ladenin." I sat down in my study chair and picked up a book for me to read. At least read a book more useful than must ladenin Salsa.

"So Riko's sister wanted to come here" Salsa told me.

"Continue?"

"Yes. He's not coming."

"Why?"

"I don't know, it's business like that."

 

I keep focused on reading the book in my hand. Without having to see Salsa speaking to me. At least I still have my hearing even though I don't see Salsa talking to me.

 

"Manda!"

"M." Mmm."

"If people talk you see. Don't worry about it!" hearing Salsa scolding me, I turned to look at my best friend who was carrying it.

"I don't see you. But I still hear what you're talking about. I'll answer that."

"Yes, you are not polite." Salsa glared at me. Basic, I told him to come here so he could share his story with him. Not even invited to argue kayak gini. My head is not calm even added puyeng if I talk about it continue with Salsa.

"OKAY. I'm sorry," I said lazily.

"Oh yeah, what's the problem that you discussed yesterday's chat time on whatsapp?" salsa asked, waiting for my story.

Before answering Salsa and telling a long story. I took a slow breath. "So, Ustaz Aris and his family came here."

"Keep."

"yeah. I don't know when the wedding will take place. I agree too, but ..."

"But, what?"

"Mother seemed forced to agree," I replied in a weak tone.

"Continue. You will still marry ustaz Aris even if your mother does not agree."

"I. I tried to say the same to Mom. I'm okay even though I didn't get married with ustaz Aris. I said it was the same, but Mom still said it's okay you marry me, son. What else do I have to answer?"

"Eh. You are if you do not become married to ustaz Aris. The world will be dark for you to see. Because I know you love to die with him! That's why you can't forget ustaz Aris as hard as you try, Manda." Salsa held my hand. "Your mother can't be selfish with her attitude. Even if you say no papa, but still there will be pain hidden in your heart."

 

I looked down and was confused back by all this. What should I choose if it is like this.

 

"Where is Mom now?" ask Salsa to me.

"Mothers. Mum to the rice field," I replied.

"This is it, Manda." Salsa held my hand as she smiled to strengthen it. "You follow your heart. If your heart is sure to marry ustaz Aris. Get married, but if you have any doubts. Don't do it."

"Your mother doesn't have to think too much about it. God willing, I sincerely see you will marry ustaz Aris. Well, even if it's not straightforward. Because of the annoyance you remember, maybe."

 

I was silent to all Salsa said. And it looks like I'll tell Mom if I'm ready. Hopefully with time running, I will be completely happy to see me have a husband like ustaz Aris.

 

"Udah. Don't think about it, tomorrow you have to go back to Mataram for a re-list" said Salsa, standing in front of me.

"Huh. Must tomorrow?" manywould be surprised.

"Yes, not really. From yesterday it was open. So, for those who pass the re-list."

"Ooh. I'm talking about this marriage first with Mom. Later on, I'll also ask permission to make in love if not re-list."

"What is love?" salsa was confused. "You mean how?"

"We go out first. Talk outside later. It's hot in here," take me and get out with Salsa from the room. I also took Salsa to sit in front of the porch. Sitting outside is cooler than inside.

 

Before continuing the conversation, I went in first to the kitchen to get the mixed ice Salsa I had bought before Salsa came.

In just five minutes, I came carrying a true glass filled with fresh mixed ice.

"It's a drink first," I said thrusting the glass.

"Thank you .." replied Salsa grinning before me.

"How's it feel? yummy?"

"Hmmm. It's delicious, Da." I smiled broadly at the expression of Salsa enjoying the ice mix. "Eh. What did you mean?"

"Which one?" askaku.

"That's what's loved? I don't know what you mean."

Before explaining Salsa I was silent for a moment. "mmmmmmm. Said Mother. Mom already said the terms to ustaz Aris if Mom wanted me to go to college. But, the terms are only agreed with ustaz Aris alone."

"Lohs. Mean you?"

"Yes. So, if Mr. Kyai same ustazah Nisa still think about it."

"Can't that be it?" Salsa was confused by what I was told.

"Yes that is. How do you want it?"

"Yes not only. I told you to marry Aris. Uh, it's your turn to want them to not give you a lecture," Salsa said.

"Not in love. They're still thinking that's what Mom said."

"Eh. It's the same, I think."

"Yes, not."

"Hmmm. It's up to you" said Salsa, then continued to drink the ice.

If I had not gone to college, I would have devoted myself to being a housewife. The dream to continue school to college was only a dream that did not materialize.

In fact, you will be sad and disappointed. But his disappointment was hidden. Because I know you're disappointed in me.

If only Dad existed. I also want to share my complaint with my father. As a child, my father left us. All this time the only hard work is mom. And whatever my problem is only the mother where I complain other than Allah.