A DEEP WOUND

Ragil Fainted

 

When they came back, they were still standing there. Maybe they are waiting for me or not. I wish I didn't.

Trying to stay calm and not show any irritation or nervousness. With confidence I passed them. However, in fact they stopped my steps again.

 

"For what did Ustazah Nisa call me? Wasn't enough with that greeting. To be honest I was lazy to speak to Ustaz Aris and Ustazah Nisa," I murmured inwardly.

I had to say hello back to them. After my move was dismissed by the wife of the man who had betrayed me.

"We can have a chat, Da?" ask Ustazah Nisa to me.

With heavy feeling. I had to agree with my teacher with a bland smile. Before sitting with them. I asked permission to give food to my friend Febi.

It only took me five minutes to come back with forced steps. They may have forgotten what happened before, but they have not completely forgotten what happened.

I tried to sit near Ustazah Nisa. And this time, I'm not nervous anymore when I see those two people. Except the pain in this heart. Lukaku is still impregnated to know when it will be lost.

"Who are you here with, Da?" ask Zah Nisa.

"Just like, Zah," I replied.

"Where's your friend?"

"That's her boyfriend, Zah."

"Lohhh .. Temen you are fun with her boyfriend. Who were you the same?"

"Alone, Zah."

 

After this, I don't know what else he'll ask. I feel like I want to hurry\-quickly leave from before them. Sometimes I see Ustaz Aris who only focus on seeing the crowds on the beach.

 

Without him unwilling to ask like his wife. If only you knew. How painful is this heart. Not even a year, they have forgotten what happened to me.

Yep. I thought they were very bad to me. Especially Ustaz Aris. Now I know, he didn't really love me. In fact, with a short time he immediately collapsed having a wife like Ustazah Nisa.

"You're here on a motorcycle?" ask Ustaz Aris to see me. I thought the way he was facing the other side, he wouldn't ask me this. But in fact he dared to also ask me without feeling heavy near his wife.

"Na'am, Ustaz," I answered briefly.

"Where are you at school now?" ask Ustazah Nisa again.

I'm starting to get confused about that question. But I don't want to have to answer. "No school, Zah. Ana's working now."

"Lohhh ... Why didn't you go to school? you're doing well too, Manda. Honey if it doesn't continue."

Again Ustazah Nisa more and more spread asking this to me. I just kept quiet and smiled without answering again.

"Yes, already. You just go back to the cottage, later in the same deal with Ustaz Aris. So you can go abroad." Ustazah Nisa this time stroked my shoulder. I don't know for sure what they mean by constantly persuading me to go back to the cottage.

Previously, Ustaz Aris had also come home several times. Still with the same purpose. To persuade me to return to the cottage. Soon they forget everything. It was easy for them to be mediocre, and told me to go back to the boarding school.

If you can, until anytime I won't want to go back there. It's been quite sick that I've received.

"Sorry, Zah. Ana wants to go to a friend first," I told Ustazah Nisa and of course Ustaz Aris too.

"Oh, yes, Manda. If I may know. Where do you work?" asked Ustazah Nisa to stand before me before I left in front of the two of them.

"In the vicinity of Mataram kok, Zah. Yeah, I'm leaving, Zah. Asslamu'alaikum," I replied again and immediately stepped out to leave them.

Don't want to linger at it. I gave her my phone number too.

With an unsettling feeling. Accidentally when the smile I used to see.

Now it looks again after all this time. Ustaz Aris was able to paralyze my mind. The smile that I used to see now looks again to make this heart beat fast. I sat with his wife for a long time. Finally, he wanted to see me with a smile.

Whether I should forget what happened first or not. Every time I see that smile. Sometimes I forget all the pain she ever gave me.

Is this what is called love? But he has hurt us. Somehow, sometimes we as humans always hide that feeling.

No matter how big the taste is still in the heart. I will try to remove it. Because I still know myself. Can't love a man\ a man who already belongs to another woman.

******

"Why are you, Da? From there on diem continued. You why?" ask Febi when we're at the boarding house.

"Nothing, really, Feb." I started to open the boarding gate and invited Febi in.

"Nothing, really, your face is that. There's no way there's nothing, Manda."

Without answering my friend's question. I tried to lay my body on my bed. The head is still covered with hijab. I refuse to take it off.

"Eeehhhh, Da. Who were you sitting on the beach earlier, anyway?"

I just kept quiet and tried to close my eyes. Yaah. This time I can't lie to myself. My mind continued to be overshadowed by Ustazku's own face.

The more I try to forget. The more God often finds us. What God's plan I don't know.

"Manda. Answer what my question is?"

Didn't want to see Febi pushing my body. I had to answer the question. "That was my Ustazah when I was in the boarding house."

"Teruss .. whose guy? whoa, handsome, huh?" Febi was curious again with Ustaz Aris. Makes me grunt.

"That's her husband," I answered waking up from my fall. Now sit with your back against the wall.

"His husband??"

"Yes. How shocked are you."

"I don't think he's married yet. I swear, he's a real good-looking guy, Da."

"Create ..."

"Yes there is no. If he doesn't have a wife, I'd like to tell you to greet me to him. Aduuhhh .. Any girl's vows will melt when she sees him. I'm certain. You are the same as me. Try it if he doesn't have a wife."

"You're nothing, Feb! Kayak men are not admired by women. Just won handsome, his heart rotten!"

Without realizing it, Febi was shocked to hear my words. I was not aware of what I had said.

"eeehhh. How did you say that?"

"Nothing" I tried to divert the conversation by taking the phone in my bag.

"Cock you angry? What the hell is it, Manda?" Maybe he was curious about what I said. Until Febi approached me.

"What's wrong? You got a problem?"

"Nothing, Feb. I'm just dizzy" I replied again.

Hopefully, he is not confused by my behavior that does not like when discussing Ustaz Aris earlier. I'm afraid that Febi will get curious later. Makes him wonder. And I don't want him to know my past while still in the boarding house.