A DEEP WOUND

Ice Cream

 

Mother held my hand, and this grip felt cold. He looked at me. I don't know what mom is thinking.

 

"Will you ask something?"

Just talking, mommy made me decks. I don't know what mom wants to ask. "Yes. I'm gonna ask you what."

"Two days ago ..."

"Oh, yes, Buk. I want to tell Mom. If before going home, this morning until noon Manda so take a writing test to enter college. Ibu doain Manda yes, hopefully I can pass."

 

Even I forgot, if it cut off the mother's words earlier.

 

"Amin. I always pray for you, son."

"What did you want to do to Manda?" I was waiting for a question to come out of my mouth.

"So, two days ago .. ustaz Aris came here, son."

"What!" clearly my eyes were wide open to hear mother's words. "I mean, Mother?"

"Yes. He's here with Mr. Kyai" said my mother gently to tell me.

 

I watched every expression of my mother. Mom used to go down to tell me. While I, still do not believe what he said. What is the purpose of ustaz Aris suddenly\sudah came to the house to meet his mother and with Pak Kyai anyway.

 

"Me-they're why here, Buk?" manyworry. I'm afraid they'll hurt my mom later.

"Ustaz Aris's. Ustaz Aris came here with you."

 

I gulped bitterly when I heard mother's words. What I heard, whether I heard it wrong or not.

 

"I mean what Mom?"

"Mom will ask first. Are you still in touch with him?"

I was stunned again hearing mother's words. I'm confused what to say. Either you have to tell him what happened or not.

If all this time ustaz Aris and his wife had asked that I want to marry ustaz Aris.

"You never got in touch with ustaz Aris. Continue ... When they came here they said anything to Mother?"

"Before they apologized to Mom about what happened first. And, if you agree, he says he wants to go straight to the wedding in this house."

"Huh. What a crazy man, Buk! Cook the wedding here?"

 

Really, I don't think if Ustaz Aris is desperate to go home to meet mom. Without him having to ask first and tell me. He also brought Mr. Kyai here.

 

"But, Mother is also confused, son. On the other hand, I don't want to see Ustaz Aris. Even though Mom forgave him, still my heart still hurts when they insult you first. And, it's hard to see you marry a man who already has a wife."

 

I don't know what they're talking to Mom about. But, it seems very clear that the mother is weak. I think I hate that mom is gone too.

 

"You don't know, Buk. Manda did not know the meaning of Ustaz Aris," I said sadly. I want to avoid talking to my mom. I'm not strong if I have to discuss Aris's ustaz. It hurts too much if you discuss polygamy later.

It was like telling mom about my meeting with ustaz Aris and ustazah Nisa. However, seeing my mother seemed sad. I chose to be quiet, this heart also heavily tells this to mother.

"You sleep first, Buk. Drowsiness feels," I said a little menguam pretend in front of mother.

 

I was intentionally like that so that there was no long conversation between me and my mother.

 

******

 

 

I was going to the kitchen to find food. Because the stomach from this afternoon has been in constant contact. Instead of eating, I met my mom in the kitchen.

 

My hunger felt lost when discussing ustaz Aris and Abinya. My body was still cold from the shock of hearing my mother's story.

I stepped up and then naek to the bed, Salsa was just watching me from now on. "Why do you see me like that, Sa?"

 

"Nothing," Salsa answered, "so I heard the conversation you had with your mother."

"Huh. Mean you?" I'm approaching Salsa. "My voice is the same as my mother's whimper up here?"

"yeh. No that's. Just wanted to get some water in the kitchen. And not intentionally listen to your conversation with mom. I'm back."

"Turnback. Why not drink water?"

"I'm ashamed to bother you. What you're talking about is not ordinary either. Serious thing, right," said Salsa again while tying her hair."

"Do I need to get you some water" I offered.

"No, Da. I want to do a lot with you?"

"What's the?"

"It's about that guy. Ustaz."

 

Hm. I don't know why tonight I have to talk about ustaz Aris again. It seems like tonight I will not be able to sleep because\-for mother and Salsa discuss ustaz Aris.

 

"So, ustaz Aris came here, didn't you?"

"Ulus. Slowly. Your voice is ..."

"Eh. Sorry, I didn't mean it."

 

Salsa asked her voice like that. He doesn't know if I'm so worried that mom's up.

 

"I don't know, Sa. But that's what mom said. I'm also confused about ustaz Aris."

"I told you. If it is love with you. But, his intentions are good as well, especially until he gets here the same Mr. Kyai wants to apply for you."

"Kok you even support ustaz Aris?" my many frowns.

"Not supported. But, you want to tell me," replied Salsa sewot.

 

I was just silently thinking about how could ustaz Aris come suddenly\-suddenly to my house to propose to me. I don't know what I'd be like if I had to be Nisa's honey. Although Nisa's ustazah did not express her heartache. I know how heartbroken it would be to see ustaz Aris marry me.

Because I know how much he loves ustaz Aris. If I could, I'd like to close my eyes for a moment so as not to think about the thing that is straining me. All of that still lies before me.

 

I lay down, and refused to invite Salsa to ustaz Aris again. Maybe, by sleeping can make my mind calm tomorrow.

"Manda!"

Again\again Salsa called my name. He did not know what if my eyes had revolted from earlier to sleep.

"Manda!"

"Hm."

"If you marry ustaz Aris. Sure, your life will change. I think but."

When my eyes were closed, I was surprised to open my eyes again. "What do you mean?"

"Yes. Kan ustaz Aris. If you marry her. You won't have to work anymore."

"You're so far away, the fantasy. I pray again that he will not be a match to her. You even think there," I said annoyed to see Salsa who was still sitting nearby

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