A DEEP WOUND

Early Farewell

One month passed, finally the announcement of graduating college was announced.

At first I was very happy. It turned out to be able to graduate and be accepted to study at State University.

 

If you ask me if I am happy. Then I will answer that I am very happy.

 

But my happiness is also accompanied by concern. Well, where I'm having a dilemma about my own heart.

 

When Salsa suggested that I pray to God. Ustaz Aris's face just kept appearing in front of me. To the point that work has no spirit.

I wonder, why can Aris's face continue to be in front of me. As I know while he has a wife.

I am tired and tired of my own feelings. Maybe this is called love. My eyes are blinded by love. My heart is like forcing, forcing to accept Aris's ustaz proposal.

 

Maybe, I always said in front of my best friend and mother that I don't love ustaz Aris anymore. However, it was different from my most profound heart. That, I still really love that man\-man figure.

 

My heart still hurts, but it can't just make me lose my love.

The next day, I stayed at Salsa's house. And that afternoon I laid down on the soft bed of Salsa.

Salsa read a novel by her hand. Actually, I don't want to bother him. But, I can't if I don't ask my best friend's opinion.

I took a breath first before asking. "Salsa," I rebuked Salsa who was beside me.

 

"Hm."

"I want to tell you."

"Hm."

 

I snorted at Salsa who was reluctant to want to see me. He was still focused on reading the novel. He didn't know what, danger if he read like that. Maybe he wants his eyes to be min.

Rather than tired of people talking who do not want our ladenin meningan I just keep quiet. Not bad, do not talk is not in vain to get out.

 

"What are you talking about, Da?

Nah. It was my turn to get me and close my eyes. It was even a negor.

"That's .. I want to tell you." Honestly, I doubt I actually said it like this Salsa. Whether he was surprised or not.

"You know what?"

"If ... if I .. marry. How's it?"

"Uhukis. Uhuk. Uhuk."

 

Obviously I got up and sat down and frowned hearing Salsa cough. Was he surprised, because I said marriage.

 

"Why you?" I asked Salsa when she took the water on her study table.

"What did you say, just now. You're kidding me, right?"

"Kidding? What am I kidding for? be serious."

"Who do you want to marry, Manda?" Salsa approached me while sitting near me. "Entar. You ... want to marry that guy?"

 

I was silent for a moment with Salsa's question. Then I nodded slowly assuring him.

 

"Huh. Ye. What the fuck, Manda? How can you ..." I don't know, Salsa's expression was disappointed to see me. He even massaged his forehead. "Manda. You have graduated college. Why even think of marriage?"

"Yes. I know I graduated. But, I can even get married while in college too." I tried to convince Salsa. I wish he had said that he agreed to see me if I married ustaz Aris. But, why now does he put on a disappointed face when I make a decision like this.

"Don't you agree?" I asked with a slightly sad face.

 

Salsa's words clearly stunned me to hear it. I don't understand Salsa's line of thought. Who had agreed, now protested.

 

"What the hell you do, Sa. Yesterday you agreed that I married even though he had a wife. Then why are you saying kayak gini now?"

"I agree, Manda. Who says I don't agree. Instead of you tormenting with your own feelings, yes mengingan you marry. But this is another problem, you just got accepted into college suddenly want to marry again. Oh, God ..."

 

Salsa patted her forehead looking at me. I was silent, and I understood Salsa's words. "But I haven't told you about Mom either."

 

"Oh, yes. You think before you make a decision. If I may have been this broken my heart would have agreed that you married Aris. If your mother didn't know she agreed or not."

 

 

I fell silent again for the wrong time thinking about all the words of my best friend. Hearing my mother's name made me think long. Either you agree or not later if I say I want to marry my ustaz.

 

 

But, I'm sure you'll be surprised when you hear what I say later.

"Tomorrow anthrin go home, Sa," I said slowly to Salsa.

"Huh. Antrin home?" Salsa put on a shocked face as I told her a plea. "Why do you want to go home again?"

"You know, Mother. He agrees or not."

"Not going to agree. I'm sure!" salsa replied.

"You mean?"

"Eh. From the beginning, your mother did not like it. Especially since you got bad treatment, your mother doesn't like to talk about ustaz Aris."

"Yeah. At least I tried first to talk about everything the same Mom. Once he agreed," I hope.

"What can't happen, yes, if you call Mom over the phone. Don't have to go home? Your home is far away for mercy. If there was a plane to get there. I use a plane instead of a motorbike or a car. Where the streets are like that too. Hadehhh ..."

"Lebay is a person. Is West Lombok the same as North Lombok far away in your opinion?" I was upset by Salsa's words.

"Yes, far away. So far!"

"But we're not going through the island to my house, Sa. You don't have to be that. If you want to do it, just nganter. If not yes. Don't be long-winded."

"I'm not long-winded. But at least now there's a cape, Manda."

"You heard me, Sa. If you're talking about something like this with Mom over the phone, she's afraid it'll be a debate! You already know I don't like it when discussing Aris ustaz with his family. Cook yes I have to ask permission suddenly and talk about this serious thing over the phone."

 

 

I'm upset by all Salsa's words that beat\-tele. If he doesn't want to, at least he doesn't have to talk about this it keeps. I'm tired of it too.

 

I'm actually worried about talking about something like this to my mom. But I will try to persuade him to agree. My prayers are like that.

 

Don't forget to follow my social media. Let me know a new story I am going to publish soon. Stories that will make you curious.

 

 

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@Amy'e Umm

Amy'e Umm

@Amy'e Umm

Amy'e Umm